downside of weightloss/ warning disgusting
As I have lost weight over the years there are some changes my body has gone through that have been less than pleasant. The upside is, if I can push through them they usually resolve themselves within a few week ( or couple of months). One of the big things is the loose sagging skin. I do not mind it so much on a vanity level because it is easily tucked into my clothes and put out of sight. So, it does not bother me too much; Other than my arms and I work on those a great deal building muscle. However, the loose skin on other parts of my body often becomes really sore and painful. It rubs against other skin constantly and gets huge sores that sometimes bleed. Every move I make is excruciating. The issue is worsened when I work out and sweat. It rubs more AND now has salty sweat in those open wounds. It is disgusting and embarrassing. My body is my own worst enemy. My left inner thigh is experiencing this right now. I have been through this multiple times as I have lost weight, each time affecting a different place on my body. Luckily it stops after awhile. That is the part I do not understand. How does it just stop? What can I do to help it not be so painful. It just started today and got more and more sore as the day has progressed. The good part is I have 2 off days to allow the sores to heal and the redness to go away. Hopefully, by Monday when I am back to the grind, the issue will have resolved itself.
A second downside is my menstrual cycle actually comes once a month now. I hate that. I likes it better when I rarely had one, sometimes I would go a year or two without one. Now, that I have lost weight I suffer the womans curse every month. It is so annoying and pointless. The bloating, the cramping, the loose stools, the bleeding, the emotions...the whole ball park just sucks. It is getting close to time and I expect the cramping to hit any day now. This is one that is not resolving itself and stopping. Instead it is getting more regular but lasting a shorter number of days than it used to.
Lastly, my digestive system goes through really screwy cycles as I lose weight. I go from having diarrhea to being constipated, rarely ever having a regular/ normal bowel movement. This side effect is super annoying. I guess I should be thankful it eventually gets out instead of just building up inside of me. After days of constipation I seem to just explode. Nasty AND annoying.
I hate my body. I am working hard to bring my body to a place where I will not hate it nearly as much. However, many of the steps along the way cause a great deal of discomfort and/ or pain and they can be really discouraging at times. There are moments when I feel like the path is just not worth the destination. Then I look at myself and know that I do not want to stay where I am. So, I press on.
My body is my worst enemy and my life is the battle ground.
I endure.
Now, I just pray that I heal and move past this stage by Monday because it is very painful and once Monday rolls around I will begin my working out like a crazy woman again. My body will not defeat me this time. My body will not steal my hopes and dreams. One day, my body will be my friend and not just a foe to overcome.
One day...
A second downside is my menstrual cycle actually comes once a month now. I hate that. I likes it better when I rarely had one, sometimes I would go a year or two without one. Now, that I have lost weight I suffer the womans curse every month. It is so annoying and pointless. The bloating, the cramping, the loose stools, the bleeding, the emotions...the whole ball park just sucks. It is getting close to time and I expect the cramping to hit any day now. This is one that is not resolving itself and stopping. Instead it is getting more regular but lasting a shorter number of days than it used to.
Lastly, my digestive system goes through really screwy cycles as I lose weight. I go from having diarrhea to being constipated, rarely ever having a regular/ normal bowel movement. This side effect is super annoying. I guess I should be thankful it eventually gets out instead of just building up inside of me. After days of constipation I seem to just explode. Nasty AND annoying.
I hate my body. I am working hard to bring my body to a place where I will not hate it nearly as much. However, many of the steps along the way cause a great deal of discomfort and/ or pain and they can be really discouraging at times. There are moments when I feel like the path is just not worth the destination. Then I look at myself and know that I do not want to stay where I am. So, I press on.
My body is my worst enemy and my life is the battle ground.
I endure.
Now, I just pray that I heal and move past this stage by Monday because it is very painful and once Monday rolls around I will begin my working out like a crazy woman again. My body will not defeat me this time. My body will not steal my hopes and dreams. One day, my body will be my friend and not just a foe to overcome.
One day...