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Apr 06, 2008 10:41

God, its been so long. I have free time for once or else I would not be typing this. I would love to write a complete entry on the changes in my life that have occured and all the thoughts that stream into my mind every night for the past 3 months that have kept me restless through the night, but I dont have THAT much free time.
My life has dramatically changed from even last year to this year. More dramatically from 21-25 to right now at 27. Twenty-seven! Yes, I am 27 now. I'm in my upper 20's. And I FEEL like it. My voice seems to have become more womanly, my behavior, my disposition, and demeanor, or it seems to me. Everyone should ask themselves at least once in their adulthood when did you feel like you became a woman or a man. Ive asked myself many of times and have never gave it much thought and probably because I was not at that time feeling like a woman. At the ripe age of 27 I can now say I FEEL like a woman.
I have reflected on alot of my youth and can not believe the things I did or how I have acted. This is just a minor example; For instance, on my 27th birthday I went to Napa Valley. I have never had so much fun. And what did I do? I wasn't always talking, I didnt drink till I vomite, I didnt have 20 friends with me, and I didnt need anyone to 'hold my hand' ,figuratively speaking, as I went and did whatever I wanted to do. When I was 21 my idea wouldnt have been to go to Wine Country w/ 3 friends. It would have and was to get everyone and anyone I knew to go to some bar and drink till I puked. Now, I pose the question to myself, "How is THAT any fun?" But it's all a part of growth. I do NOT regret how I've spent my younger years partying. Besides, the past is the past and can't be changed. Would I have done things differently if I knew what I know now? Why, yes! I honestly could have BEEN a Court Reporter by the age of 20 making $65k a year and living a different life, but that's ok. It is ok because I am doing it NOW. In this moment I am taking the actions necessary to get to where I would like to be.
So I spent my 27th birthday in complete peace and relaxation. Splurging $340 on myself for 4 hours in the resort spa- ALL BY MYSELF. 50 min tension massage, 50 minute European Facial, 50 Wine seed extract scrub and mud wrap with a massage, and all this while in the wineries caves! I was even served lunch with a large glass of Cabernet Sauvigion. *Not a fave btw.*
It was nothing short of wonderful!

Im not going to delve deeper into these new epiphanies in my life but I'd like to acknowledge the fact that change is GOOD. And I firmly stand by my belief that letting go of certain people and friends and lifestyles can be beneficial to ones own well-being. If you continue to act in a certain way, you will continue to get the same results. Change is goood. People dont just change. They change if the truely WANT to.

These are all the books I have been reading and I believe help guide me in the way of finding myself and coming to this self-exploratory, enlightening, and transcendent way of thinking. I highly recommend all these books. Even just for the sake of entertainment. It is all in the readers hands if they choose to understand fully what they are reading.

"Blink" Malcolm Gladwell
"The Ultimate Secrets of Total Self-Confidence" Dr. Robert Anthony
"The Attractor Factor" Joe Vitale
"The Alchemist" Paulo Coelho
"How to be happy, dammit. A cynic's guide to spiritual happiness" Karen Salmansohn
"A New Earth" Eckhart Tolle
"Eat Pray Love" Elizabeth Gilbert
"The Celestine Prophecy" James Redfield
"Secrets of the Millionaire Mind. Mastering the Inner Game of Wealth" T. Harv Eker
"Conversations with God an uncommon dialogue" Book 1 Neale Donald Walsch
"The Dharma Bums" Jack Kerouac
"The Game" Neil Strauss
"The Art of Seduction" Robert Greene
"How to Think like Leonardo da Vinci" Michael J. Gelb
"Focus on the good stuff" Mike Robbins
"The Secret" Rhonda Byrne
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