no one is honest in this world if they cant first be true to themselves

[supressed_dolor]

when we were younger a different anticipation used to fill our hearts with joy and excitement. the view of what was to come always was bright. being in the company of your family and friends was all your life depended on, all your life consisted of, all your life was based on. but soon that brilliance begins to decay, diminish and your outlook on the future turns to worry. its another stage of who you are that youre entering, another side to the coin with two faces. you look back on the days of childhood memories that glow like slowly smoldering embers in the fireplace and realize how fast its fading from contact. how far gone it seems to be. those days seem like they existed in a past life, because you feel like a totally different person. and thats what happens. people change. and above all, it appears that youve changed the most, because youre the only one looking in and out of yourself constantly. chiding away to self-analysis and introspection to try and find what makes you, you. the process is degrading and undermines any stability that ever could have existed had you not gotten lost in the enigmas of your mind. some things we're not meant to solve, some paths should be left untread. to seek the deepest of answers-the core behind your pretense-is to seek self-destruction, and once you embark upon the search, there's no turning back.



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it was your birthday on friday.
my bittersweet birthday wishes go out to you.