My head...hurts...SO MUCH
My head..hurts so much, you have no idea. Well maybe you do, because you may have done similar things. Anyway.
I've been really depresed for a week. I got my tiny little heart broken by a boy. Smashed into a thousand pieces. And it may not even be that bad, if he had agreed to be my friend..But of course we know that is totally "against the law" for guys to be friends after they have been involved with someone or dating them. Which that comment is interesting in itself, in this situation because I didn't even know I was "Dating him" but I was told I was..aparently. But not really because we didn't do date type things. He never paid for me...and picked on me as much as he picked on his freinds..sometimes more. Anyway! Very obnoxiously complicated. Let's move on. So basically- he never wants to talk to me again. And I wrote this long e-mail, one night when i Learned too much info about him from his "ex friend" Goff. And found out that He, John, has lied to me..on Several occasions. And I can't stand lying more then anything. I lOath it. What does it get you? nothing. People feel the need to ly to me, so I won't flip out I guess- do you think I'll be ok ..when I DO find out. And I will..I always do. And just like the movies "it hurts so much more comming from someone else" only its worse then that..maybe because this is real life and not the movies. And then I kind of think, well what if he isn't lying as much Goff says he is- and Goff is trying to just turn me against him. Which is what I was warned about from John right before I was-forbidden to hang out with Goff, and realated to him- but why would I be forbidden from hanging out with him? And then found out that John himself has hung out with Them recently. So do they know things that John was hiding from me? uuuhhh Anyway..Uh shutup Amie..Uh I hate shutup. He used to say that to me a lot too. Anyway- So! I was really depressed. I love him a lot, and it makes me sick. But I don't want to be treated like that, so I stood up for myself, and he can't handle it, so he would rather have nothing to do with me- so Anyhoo-just thought I'd get you all caught up. Um- So I was really depressed, everything I do, I think about him, anything anyone says I can relate it back to a time with John, or something he said. How sick is that? So anyhoo- This Entry is for all you people, that have been just dying to hear the time that i get drunk. And I didn't think it would ever happen but, desprite times- desprite meaures..or Vunerable times.. And if you don't know me, I'm not like this. I don't usually even drink, and I have never gotten drunk. First and Last. Here is the story.
I was at my sisters. And She was tired of seeing me upset, so she wanted me to tell her the story, of the night I went out with he and his friends. Which are now partly kind of my friends, because they excepted me and had my back so quick, and then ganged up on John for being mean to me. And saying comments that were just..mean, and not funny. But how is suppose to know, when people laugh, and not funny jokes? This is how he knows.= He learns the hard way. Going down hard and boy was it hard. 3 of his close guy friends totally ganging up on him all at once for like 15 minutes straight. Ouch. So he stormed off, and said Fuck off. And walked to his truck to the oppisite side of the mall, by himself in 1 degree weather. And my sister flipped out at this story and said "What? How could you want that, if you ever dated him, you couldn't bring him here, because if Chris and Ryan (my brothers) ever picked on him for anything, and he stormed off to his truck, that would be the end. And you better believe I would have no problem going out to the truck and telling him he wasn't welcome to come back until he grew up" And she kept telling me to drink, the drink she made me. Which was rancid. It was supposed to be a long Island Ice tea- However, (comma) she didn't have regular rum, she only had 151 proof Black Rum. So she used that. And it was Nasty...nasty. Strong- woah. So, to "drown" the alcohole taste (?)I added this...I don't know what it was..Orange something er rather. It was pretty strong, but tasted like orange, and I was hoping to save the "tea" it didn't. Still nasty. So now my long Island has 151 proof black rum and a total of 7 shots. With a splash of Coke. So I have to finish it in a hour to show my "appreciation" for what Sara had done. SO, while i was drinking that, slowly and telling my story. Aparently..I wasn't intoxicated enough, well i wasn't I wasn't buzzed at all. So She was drinking a martini was like "you need more, here try this, do you want one of these" and was namming all this stuff, and I was like. No that gross..blabla. And after a while she was like "how bout a shot" and I was like..eh, "of what" so she gets excited and jumps up "thats what you need!" and I was like "I don't really like the taste of alcohole" and she was like "You can try an Apple shot" (Half Green Apple Shnapps and Green apple..rum?) anyway...they were pretty tasty. So every time I was like "oh John you to do that" or "he used to say that" she was like .."you need another shot". 7 Apple Shots later...I was pouring the 8th and, spun around to sing into the Green Shnapps bottle, naturally. I did a dramatic finish and dropped the bottle on the floor and it shattered. And Sara came running over and wanted to step in it and I was like "No Sara, no, no stepping in the glass that's bad" and mom was like "you have to clean that up! Meadow is going to step in it or something!" and so while I faught off Sara and told her she couldn't step in it, mom rushed around to find the broom and pan to clean it up. So we just used straight Apple ..Rum think it was. So..yeah. 9 Shots oF apple, we sang Paula Cole number 3- my favorite song. "Throwing Stones" we screamed it, on the mic and danced. The third time we sang it, we sang it for mom and we sang it really animated and danced and stuff. She liked it. We took Several Field sobriety tests throughout the evening, that when we knew we needed another shot. We walked the line- put a wooden pole on the floor and walked it, and yelled "no wall! can't touch the wall! heel to toe" and I walked it straight every time. We played, or attempted to play Air Hockey after that, and it was ..difficult. And Sara got a goal- that was like so obvious and i was upset for not blocking it, so I ..SLAMMED my head on the table, but it didn't hurt at all then, it was funny. So then, I sat down and mom started finishing our game of pool we started, and didn't do well at, very short game. I was winning so sara got pissed off and called for back up. So mom played on her own, I sat down, and sara brought over number 10, and I was like "I don't know" and she wasn't drinking one so I was like "I'm not doing it if you aren't doing it, that makes me look like an alcoholic, drinking by myself" and she was like "I can't do anymore..well lets see" and then she went over, and I guess..we finished the bottle. SO then she wanted me to sing the Evanesense song with Brian, I didn't want to get up, so sara, grabbed my hand,pulled, the chair fell over and she drug me across the carpet for like 6 feet. "There ya go!" so I sat up, and had to go pee really bad, and i walked up the stairs and knocked shit over so I was like "oh no, I think I'm drunk" I picked up the stuff, put it back on the shelf. I went to the bathroom and felt..I don't know..a little..not up to par. So I put my head between my knees (an old Track trick) to keep my head from spinning. And I was like "I'm not going to puke, I'll stay here all day, I don't give a fuck" So I starred at the designed Squares on the floor, everything was fine, I wasn't dizzy. Just starring..at the squares. So mom knocks on the door "Amie, are you ok?" -"Yeah I'm good" she returned a couple minutes later "Amie, how you doing?" "I'm good, just, starring at the squares, how long has it been?" "about 20 minutes" I didn't believe her. Anyway= Sara came in shortly..or maybe 15 minutes after that but my perception of time, was off, obviously. And I just starred at the squares, and was pushing them like buttons with my big toe. 1 2 3 4. Dark light Dark light.. Sara kneels down "you gotta get up, you can't stay there all night" "I'm good, This is working out" "do you want some water" "yeah, maybe with a little straw" so she laughs "with a little straw" mom laughs. She came back "I don't have any straws but you have to drink this so you have to pick your head up" and I barely picked it up enough to sip some water but had my eyes closed and started to feel spinning, so I put it back down. She tried to get me up several times "You can do it, come on i'll help, quick..quick Brian is comming he'll see your ass, quick get up" So I got up "quick" and pulled up my pants and I was done. I puked every shot up *minus the Ice tea* 9 times. not all at once. It went on for about 2 hours maybe. It didn't seem like that long, but I know it wasn't later then 10 when mom and phil left. And I decided to stay at Sara's because the rule was I couldn't puke in the van. So- Sara found me some PJs and tried to get me to put them on, but I just lay with my head on my arm, against the sink standing up, I was ok, if I didn't pick my head up, and every time she tried to get me to pick my head up to drink water, or do anything. Well you probably get the point.. I had two Pedilight Pops. I finallly got me PJs on after like the 6 or 7th time..ya know. And then my next opsticle was to get the couch. Meadow woke up, her usualy time 12am and Sara got her, she brought her down and Meadow rubbed my back with her tiny hand. As Sara says "say its ok B..It's ok" And she tried to get me to pick my head up and go to the couch..and yeah. So Then they left. I finally was able to walk a little, pick my head up after the 8 or 9th time, last time puking, and stubbled to the couch. Sara told me to just keep drinking water. And ya, I had dreams of puking. And puking blood. And I woke up at 3am having to go pee more then I ever have in my whole life, besides that time when I was in Mexico, snorkling and didn't go pee in the water because I thought everyone would be able to see me with their masks. And so I held it..for an hour, I was in pain. ANYHOO! Luc woke me up at 7, and I was afraid to sit up until around 8:30. And I wasn't that bad, a little random quizzyness. But not bad. Except my head..and its not even like a headache..Its..wow. My forehead. Deathly hurts. It took me a while to realize it was the Air Hockey table that did me in. so YEAH! There ya go! All you sick bastards that were dying for the day it would happen to me! And ya missed it, but not really, cuz you got that almost all full detail in writting! Thanks for Reading!
Love ya all!
I've been really depresed for a week. I got my tiny little heart broken by a boy. Smashed into a thousand pieces. And it may not even be that bad, if he had agreed to be my friend..But of course we know that is totally "against the law" for guys to be friends after they have been involved with someone or dating them. Which that comment is interesting in itself, in this situation because I didn't even know I was "Dating him" but I was told I was..aparently. But not really because we didn't do date type things. He never paid for me...and picked on me as much as he picked on his freinds..sometimes more. Anyway! Very obnoxiously complicated. Let's move on. So basically- he never wants to talk to me again. And I wrote this long e-mail, one night when i Learned too much info about him from his "ex friend" Goff. And found out that He, John, has lied to me..on Several occasions. And I can't stand lying more then anything. I lOath it. What does it get you? nothing. People feel the need to ly to me, so I won't flip out I guess- do you think I'll be ok ..when I DO find out. And I will..I always do. And just like the movies "it hurts so much more comming from someone else" only its worse then that..maybe because this is real life and not the movies. And then I kind of think, well what if he isn't lying as much Goff says he is- and Goff is trying to just turn me against him. Which is what I was warned about from John right before I was-forbidden to hang out with Goff, and realated to him- but why would I be forbidden from hanging out with him? And then found out that John himself has hung out with Them recently. So do they know things that John was hiding from me? uuuhhh Anyway..Uh shutup Amie..Uh I hate shutup. He used to say that to me a lot too. Anyway- So! I was really depressed. I love him a lot, and it makes me sick. But I don't want to be treated like that, so I stood up for myself, and he can't handle it, so he would rather have nothing to do with me- so Anyhoo-just thought I'd get you all caught up. Um- So I was really depressed, everything I do, I think about him, anything anyone says I can relate it back to a time with John, or something he said. How sick is that? So anyhoo- This Entry is for all you people, that have been just dying to hear the time that i get drunk. And I didn't think it would ever happen but, desprite times- desprite meaures..or Vunerable times.. And if you don't know me, I'm not like this. I don't usually even drink, and I have never gotten drunk. First and Last. Here is the story.
I was at my sisters. And She was tired of seeing me upset, so she wanted me to tell her the story, of the night I went out with he and his friends. Which are now partly kind of my friends, because they excepted me and had my back so quick, and then ganged up on John for being mean to me. And saying comments that were just..mean, and not funny. But how is suppose to know, when people laugh, and not funny jokes? This is how he knows.= He learns the hard way. Going down hard and boy was it hard. 3 of his close guy friends totally ganging up on him all at once for like 15 minutes straight. Ouch. So he stormed off, and said Fuck off. And walked to his truck to the oppisite side of the mall, by himself in 1 degree weather. And my sister flipped out at this story and said "What? How could you want that, if you ever dated him, you couldn't bring him here, because if Chris and Ryan (my brothers) ever picked on him for anything, and he stormed off to his truck, that would be the end. And you better believe I would have no problem going out to the truck and telling him he wasn't welcome to come back until he grew up" And she kept telling me to drink, the drink she made me. Which was rancid. It was supposed to be a long Island Ice tea- However, (comma) she didn't have regular rum, she only had 151 proof Black Rum. So she used that. And it was Nasty...nasty. Strong- woah. So, to "drown" the alcohole taste (?)I added this...I don't know what it was..Orange something er rather. It was pretty strong, but tasted like orange, and I was hoping to save the "tea" it didn't. Still nasty. So now my long Island has 151 proof black rum and a total of 7 shots. With a splash of Coke. So I have to finish it in a hour to show my "appreciation" for what Sara had done. SO, while i was drinking that, slowly and telling my story. Aparently..I wasn't intoxicated enough, well i wasn't I wasn't buzzed at all. So She was drinking a martini was like "you need more, here try this, do you want one of these" and was namming all this stuff, and I was like. No that gross..blabla. And after a while she was like "how bout a shot" and I was like..eh, "of what" so she gets excited and jumps up "thats what you need!" and I was like "I don't really like the taste of alcohole" and she was like "You can try an Apple shot" (Half Green Apple Shnapps and Green apple..rum?) anyway...they were pretty tasty. So every time I was like "oh John you to do that" or "he used to say that" she was like .."you need another shot". 7 Apple Shots later...I was pouring the 8th and, spun around to sing into the Green Shnapps bottle, naturally. I did a dramatic finish and dropped the bottle on the floor and it shattered. And Sara came running over and wanted to step in it and I was like "No Sara, no, no stepping in the glass that's bad" and mom was like "you have to clean that up! Meadow is going to step in it or something!" and so while I faught off Sara and told her she couldn't step in it, mom rushed around to find the broom and pan to clean it up. So we just used straight Apple ..Rum think it was. So..yeah. 9 Shots oF apple, we sang Paula Cole number 3- my favorite song. "Throwing Stones" we screamed it, on the mic and danced. The third time we sang it, we sang it for mom and we sang it really animated and danced and stuff. She liked it. We took Several Field sobriety tests throughout the evening, that when we knew we needed another shot. We walked the line- put a wooden pole on the floor and walked it, and yelled "no wall! can't touch the wall! heel to toe" and I walked it straight every time. We played, or attempted to play Air Hockey after that, and it was ..difficult. And Sara got a goal- that was like so obvious and i was upset for not blocking it, so I ..SLAMMED my head on the table, but it didn't hurt at all then, it was funny. So then, I sat down and mom started finishing our game of pool we started, and didn't do well at, very short game. I was winning so sara got pissed off and called for back up. So mom played on her own, I sat down, and sara brought over number 10, and I was like "I don't know" and she wasn't drinking one so I was like "I'm not doing it if you aren't doing it, that makes me look like an alcoholic, drinking by myself" and she was like "I can't do anymore..well lets see" and then she went over, and I guess..we finished the bottle. SO then she wanted me to sing the Evanesense song with Brian, I didn't want to get up, so sara, grabbed my hand,pulled, the chair fell over and she drug me across the carpet for like 6 feet. "There ya go!" so I sat up, and had to go pee really bad, and i walked up the stairs and knocked shit over so I was like "oh no, I think I'm drunk" I picked up the stuff, put it back on the shelf. I went to the bathroom and felt..I don't know..a little..not up to par. So I put my head between my knees (an old Track trick) to keep my head from spinning. And I was like "I'm not going to puke, I'll stay here all day, I don't give a fuck" So I starred at the designed Squares on the floor, everything was fine, I wasn't dizzy. Just starring..at the squares. So mom knocks on the door "Amie, are you ok?" -"Yeah I'm good" she returned a couple minutes later "Amie, how you doing?" "I'm good, just, starring at the squares, how long has it been?" "about 20 minutes" I didn't believe her. Anyway= Sara came in shortly..or maybe 15 minutes after that but my perception of time, was off, obviously. And I just starred at the squares, and was pushing them like buttons with my big toe. 1 2 3 4. Dark light Dark light.. Sara kneels down "you gotta get up, you can't stay there all night" "I'm good, This is working out" "do you want some water" "yeah, maybe with a little straw" so she laughs "with a little straw" mom laughs. She came back "I don't have any straws but you have to drink this so you have to pick your head up" and I barely picked it up enough to sip some water but had my eyes closed and started to feel spinning, so I put it back down. She tried to get me up several times "You can do it, come on i'll help, quick..quick Brian is comming he'll see your ass, quick get up" So I got up "quick" and pulled up my pants and I was done. I puked every shot up *minus the Ice tea* 9 times. not all at once. It went on for about 2 hours maybe. It didn't seem like that long, but I know it wasn't later then 10 when mom and phil left. And I decided to stay at Sara's because the rule was I couldn't puke in the van. So- Sara found me some PJs and tried to get me to put them on, but I just lay with my head on my arm, against the sink standing up, I was ok, if I didn't pick my head up, and every time she tried to get me to pick my head up to drink water, or do anything. Well you probably get the point.. I had two Pedilight Pops. I finallly got me PJs on after like the 6 or 7th time..ya know. And then my next opsticle was to get the couch. Meadow woke up, her usualy time 12am and Sara got her, she brought her down and Meadow rubbed my back with her tiny hand. As Sara says "say its ok B..It's ok" And she tried to get me to pick my head up and go to the couch..and yeah. So Then they left. I finally was able to walk a little, pick my head up after the 8 or 9th time, last time puking, and stubbled to the couch. Sara told me to just keep drinking water. And ya, I had dreams of puking. And puking blood. And I woke up at 3am having to go pee more then I ever have in my whole life, besides that time when I was in Mexico, snorkling and didn't go pee in the water because I thought everyone would be able to see me with their masks. And so I held it..for an hour, I was in pain. ANYHOO! Luc woke me up at 7, and I was afraid to sit up until around 8:30. And I wasn't that bad, a little random quizzyness. But not bad. Except my head..and its not even like a headache..Its..wow. My forehead. Deathly hurts. It took me a while to realize it was the Air Hockey table that did me in. so YEAH! There ya go! All you sick bastards that were dying for the day it would happen to me! And ya missed it, but not really, cuz you got that almost all full detail in writting! Thanks for Reading!
Love ya all!