Misunderstood
I wanna scream. cry. kick. throw. hit. whatever.
Why am I like this. I hate the way I am. I take school too seriously, and since I'm so tired of it and don't have the energy to actually do anything though we have (too) much to do, I feel bad. I have to say hello to anxiety, anguish, sleepless nights and tears, and goodbye to motivation, leisure time and happiness. I'M SO TIRED OF EVERYTHING!
I had a so called developement talk with my teacher today, talking about me, if I liked school, my class, teachers, lessons and so on. I guess we were supposed to talk more about the subjects and how I was doing, but of course I forgot the papers I got two days before with all that on, so instead it felt like we only talked about me being stressed and that I had to do something about that. And that I had a very low self-confidence and I should do something about that too. THANK YOU - like I didn't know that! I think about it every day, and I've tried to do something about it for years, and on him it sounds like you could just wake up one day with a high self-confidence.
So my conclusion about this talk, is that I now just feel worse.
Also, I wonder what he thinks when I say I'm stressed. I realised this after. Beacause, sure, I do mean I have alot to do, but me being stressed also means me feeling almost ill, crying almost every night, and letting the anxiety taking over brain and body. I'm not sure if he really understands, and I wouldn't want to tell him, because that would feel like I was exposing myself to much.
Why am I like this. I hate the way I am. I take school too seriously, and since I'm so tired of it and don't have the energy to actually do anything though we have (too) much to do, I feel bad. I have to say hello to anxiety, anguish, sleepless nights and tears, and goodbye to motivation, leisure time and happiness. I'M SO TIRED OF EVERYTHING!
I had a so called developement talk with my teacher today, talking about me, if I liked school, my class, teachers, lessons and so on. I guess we were supposed to talk more about the subjects and how I was doing, but of course I forgot the papers I got two days before with all that on, so instead it felt like we only talked about me being stressed and that I had to do something about that. And that I had a very low self-confidence and I should do something about that too. THANK YOU - like I didn't know that! I think about it every day, and I've tried to do something about it for years, and on him it sounds like you could just wake up one day with a high self-confidence.
So my conclusion about this talk, is that I now just feel worse.
Also, I wonder what he thinks when I say I'm stressed. I realised this after. Beacause, sure, I do mean I have alot to do, but me being stressed also means me feeling almost ill, crying almost every night, and letting the anxiety taking over brain and body. I'm not sure if he really understands, and I wouldn't want to tell him, because that would feel like I was exposing myself to much.