(no subject)
Quite a roller coaster ride of a week. It's been almost exclusively horrible. A lot of little things have been getting under my skin and mutating into sheer intolerance. It's put me in a really bad mood, which has probably in turn made other people get into bad moods. Sometimes when I have problems it just seems like it would be better for everyone if I just stayed off the internet so that I don't spread my rage or bitching to other people that don't deserve it. That's probably what I'm going to do from now on, because my problems never seem to really go away and they just create or rekindle the problems of others.
I've been under a ton of stress about my grades. My parents really want me to get a 4.0, and it's quite possibly the most strenuous endeavor ever. This has made me worry about shit that never used to bother me, as well as amplify any other problems that come my way. This, in turn, has probably made me come off as an asshole to those around me (namely Enn), and I'm probably going to avoid the net entirely when I have something wrong. I just know I'll end up doing something to fuck up one of the few things I have right now to be thankful of.
On top of my problems, I worry about Enn and her problems. Everytime she's upset about something my heart skips a beat and I feel just as bad as she does. She's going to tell me not to worry about it, but guess what? That's not going to happen. I can't not worry about her... It's an impossibility. She's tried to hard to re-establish contact with someone she still cares about, and the person's not even acknowledging that she exists. The certain person I'm referring to is still on my Xbox Live friends list, and the certain person is going to get removed from both it and my LiveJournal friends list if he continues to ignore our addressing of him. Even if he tells us he wants nothing to do with us, that would still be better than completely neglecting to answer us at all. He's being extremely goddamn immature and egotistical about the whole situation; so much that he is incapable of realizing that if he could get his head out of the goddamn clouds for two seconds, he could see that we're all willing to forgive and forget, and just have fun together again. If he's not going to respond to us, I'm severing all ties with him, because there's no need for them. Unless, of course, he's spying on me, which is even more immature and laughable. Absolutely histerical.
So, what I'm getting at is, my stress is causing me to act differently on Live than I otherwise would. When I'm stressed out, I keep my microphone off so that I don't offend anybody by accident. It's not necessarily that I'm mad at whoever I'm with; in fact, it's likely that it's the exact opposite. My feelings get amplified by whatever Enn's are. The fact that she pretty much poured her emotions out to someone she's trying to re-establish contact with and it all fell on deaf ears, I think, is really bothering her. She says that she doesn't care anymore, but it keeps coming back up in discussion, so she obviously does. He's not even remotely acknowledging that she's doing anything, which is about the most asshole-like thing he could hope to achieve. If you're reading this, you know just who you are. Every tie with you is going to be severed by Monday unless you get off your goddamn high chair and actually talk to us like a human being. Consider yourself warned plx.
I've been under a ton of stress about my grades. My parents really want me to get a 4.0, and it's quite possibly the most strenuous endeavor ever. This has made me worry about shit that never used to bother me, as well as amplify any other problems that come my way. This, in turn, has probably made me come off as an asshole to those around me (namely Enn), and I'm probably going to avoid the net entirely when I have something wrong. I just know I'll end up doing something to fuck up one of the few things I have right now to be thankful of.
On top of my problems, I worry about Enn and her problems. Everytime she's upset about something my heart skips a beat and I feel just as bad as she does. She's going to tell me not to worry about it, but guess what? That's not going to happen. I can't not worry about her... It's an impossibility. She's tried to hard to re-establish contact with someone she still cares about, and the person's not even acknowledging that she exists. The certain person I'm referring to is still on my Xbox Live friends list, and the certain person is going to get removed from both it and my LiveJournal friends list if he continues to ignore our addressing of him. Even if he tells us he wants nothing to do with us, that would still be better than completely neglecting to answer us at all. He's being extremely goddamn immature and egotistical about the whole situation; so much that he is incapable of realizing that if he could get his head out of the goddamn clouds for two seconds, he could see that we're all willing to forgive and forget, and just have fun together again. If he's not going to respond to us, I'm severing all ties with him, because there's no need for them. Unless, of course, he's spying on me, which is even more immature and laughable. Absolutely histerical.
So, what I'm getting at is, my stress is causing me to act differently on Live than I otherwise would. When I'm stressed out, I keep my microphone off so that I don't offend anybody by accident. It's not necessarily that I'm mad at whoever I'm with; in fact, it's likely that it's the exact opposite. My feelings get amplified by whatever Enn's are. The fact that she pretty much poured her emotions out to someone she's trying to re-establish contact with and it all fell on deaf ears, I think, is really bothering her. She says that she doesn't care anymore, but it keeps coming back up in discussion, so she obviously does. He's not even remotely acknowledging that she's doing anything, which is about the most asshole-like thing he could hope to achieve. If you're reading this, you know just who you are. Every tie with you is going to be severed by Monday unless you get off your goddamn high chair and actually talk to us like a human being. Consider yourself warned plx.