heres to you lovely

[supermonkeybean]

i never meant to let you down, mentally, physically, or educationally. the simplest things do take considerable thought for me, you're right, and i am suffocating. yes, but this is the way i HAVE to life, this is the way that i've learned to live. i am the product of my parents' teachings, where an action without thought is mental and social suicide. in this household i live in, i've gotten to know myself way better than i'd like to and i've had to deal with the intentional but not put downs handed out to me by the heckles of my family like candy. i dont feel sorry for me, in fact, i'm proud of the fact that i think more than any of my friends have to in their every day decisions. maybe one day, it'll make all the difference. or so i hope. i'm glad you hold nothing against me, and i will find my way to paradise. just as you'll find yours. i'll have none of this 'sadness' from you, its all bad. i do like you, and i definitely admire your train of thought. lifes all the better when you can find a way out of its bad times on your own. thank you for being there for me. for helping me learn even more about relationships, and for trying your best to understand me. i think there are ways in which my friends know more about whats better for me, but i also know what i want and what i want to get out of the time that i have. they can only know what i tell them of those things, so i'll just make these stupid mistakes and turn down all of life's perfections, because those are the mistakes that i'm bound to make. i WILL see you all the time lovely, you'll always be that by the way. because even as a friend, in essence, thats what you are, even if not romantically, just lovely.

meet me in rhode island. : ) and know that as i say farewell to this stage of us, i think solely of you and what you gave to me.

so much loves and laters,
angie