(no subject)
I recently ran across this, and while it wasn't meant to offend, I feel the need to clarify, at least, what I think of this. And so you know, my doing this was inspired by someone and something, but not in anyway directed at any one person.
And, for the 'top ten', my replies are in []'s.
Top Ten Signs You're a Fundamentalist Christian
10 - You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of yours.
[First off, every religion is pretty much like this. C'mon.
9 - You feel insulted and "dehumanized" when scientists say that people evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt.
[Evolution has never actually been proven true. It's just a widespread rumor that it's fact. Put it this way, if Evolution one day is proves impossible, where will people turn? Personally, I find it rather hard to believe the universe came to be, and has continued to exist and grow/evolve through a series of millions upon million 1 in 1,000,000,000 chances.]
8 - You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Triune God.
[We don't laugh at them. Besides, water/steam/ice= h2o, doesn't it? God/Son/Holy Spirt= God. Not that hard people.]
7 - Your face turns purple when you hear of the "atrocities" attributed to Allah, but you don't even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in "Exodus" and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in "Joshua" including women, children, and trees!
[Faces don't much turn purple unless there's a serious lack of oxygen.. in which then you're screwed, so more luck to you, yea of little faith. But you have to remember, back in the times that the Old Testement is written about, God interacted with people differently. He spoke with them, walked with them, and more or less gave ultimadoms.. give or take some spelling. So when He had people killed, it was because of a choice a human made.]
6 - You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky.
[Does it say the Holy Spirit impregnated her? sure you could word it that way. And Jesus was flesh and bone like you and I, but he was the Son of God, therefor was able to perform 'miracles'.]
5 - You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (few billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a few generations old.
[Because science is a tool of humans. Sure, it works to show us what we want, but is what it shows actually accurate to what the truth of the world really is, and not the truth we want to see?}
4 - You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs -- though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most "tolerant" and "loving."
[If someone believes and has accepted Christs Gift of Eternal Life, because He died for them on the cross, then they will go to Heaven. If not, then to hell they go. Rival sects or not, it's what they believe.
3 - While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in "tongues" may be all the evidence you need to "prove" Christianity.
[Because we deem people who roll around on floors speaking languages they never learned idiots. Yup, that's us... moron..]
2 - You define 0.01% as a "high success rate" when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God.
[God answers prayers according to His Will, and NOT to what WE want. OH oH I need to win the lottery! Oh I need this boy to be my boyfriend! Hah, fat chance. IF it's in His will, it will happen.
1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian.
[We KNOW all we need to in order to KNOW that we are Christian.]
If you have a problem with our Faith, then you have a problem. But no amount of "science says" or "it's been proven" or "you can't honestly believe"'s will change what we believe.
And, one things for certain:
When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not shouting "I'm clean livin."
I'm whispering "I was lost,"
Now I'm found and forgiven.
When I say..."I am a Christian"
I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble
and need CHRIST to be my guide.
When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak
and need HIS strength to carry on.
When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed
and need God to clean my mess.
When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not claiming to be perfect,
My flaws are far too visible
but, God believes I am worth it.
When I say... "I am a Christian"
I still feel the sting of pain,
I have my share of heartaches
So I call upon His name.
When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not holier than thou,
I'm just a simple sinner
who received God's good grace, somehow.
So when YOU call me a hypocrit, stop and look at yourself. You a bloody human being yourself. And Humans will NEVER be perfect. So get a clue, stop making foolish claims or accusations. Do something original for once, and ASK good questions that haven't been answered a hundred times before.
And, for the 'top ten', my replies are in []'s.
Top Ten Signs You're a Fundamentalist Christian
10 - You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of yours.
[First off, every religion is pretty much like this. C'mon.
9 - You feel insulted and "dehumanized" when scientists say that people evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt.
[Evolution has never actually been proven true. It's just a widespread rumor that it's fact. Put it this way, if Evolution one day is proves impossible, where will people turn? Personally, I find it rather hard to believe the universe came to be, and has continued to exist and grow/evolve through a series of millions upon million 1 in 1,000,000,000 chances.]
8 - You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Triune God.
[We don't laugh at them. Besides, water/steam/ice= h2o, doesn't it? God/Son/Holy Spirt= God. Not that hard people.]
7 - Your face turns purple when you hear of the "atrocities" attributed to Allah, but you don't even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in "Exodus" and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in "Joshua" including women, children, and trees!
[Faces don't much turn purple unless there's a serious lack of oxygen.. in which then you're screwed, so more luck to you, yea of little faith. But you have to remember, back in the times that the Old Testement is written about, God interacted with people differently. He spoke with them, walked with them, and more or less gave ultimadoms.. give or take some spelling. So when He had people killed, it was because of a choice a human made.]
6 - You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky.
[Does it say the Holy Spirit impregnated her? sure you could word it that way. And Jesus was flesh and bone like you and I, but he was the Son of God, therefor was able to perform 'miracles'.]
5 - You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (few billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a few generations old.
[Because science is a tool of humans. Sure, it works to show us what we want, but is what it shows actually accurate to what the truth of the world really is, and not the truth we want to see?}
4 - You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs -- though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most "tolerant" and "loving."
[If someone believes and has accepted Christs Gift of Eternal Life, because He died for them on the cross, then they will go to Heaven. If not, then to hell they go. Rival sects or not, it's what they believe.
3 - While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in "tongues" may be all the evidence you need to "prove" Christianity.
[Because we deem people who roll around on floors speaking languages they never learned idiots. Yup, that's us... moron..]
2 - You define 0.01% as a "high success rate" when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God.
[God answers prayers according to His Will, and NOT to what WE want. OH oH I need to win the lottery! Oh I need this boy to be my boyfriend! Hah, fat chance. IF it's in His will, it will happen.
1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian.
[We KNOW all we need to in order to KNOW that we are Christian.]
If you have a problem with our Faith, then you have a problem. But no amount of "science says" or "it's been proven" or "you can't honestly believe"'s will change what we believe.
And, one things for certain:
When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not shouting "I'm clean livin."
I'm whispering "I was lost,"
Now I'm found and forgiven.
When I say..."I am a Christian"
I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble
and need CHRIST to be my guide.
When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak
and need HIS strength to carry on.
When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed
and need God to clean my mess.
When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not claiming to be perfect,
My flaws are far too visible
but, God believes I am worth it.
When I say... "I am a Christian"
I still feel the sting of pain,
I have my share of heartaches
So I call upon His name.
When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not holier than thou,
I'm just a simple sinner
who received God's good grace, somehow.
So when YOU call me a hypocrit, stop and look at yourself. You a bloody human being yourself. And Humans will NEVER be perfect. So get a clue, stop making foolish claims or accusations. Do something original for once, and ASK good questions that haven't been answered a hundred times before.