Los Angeles
Today, I sat in my office thinking about my move to Los Angeles and how great it's going to be when I move to a place I've been wanting to be for such a long time. I turned down three opportunities to move to Los Angeles and I'm not about to let it go by again. I'm ready. I know a lot of people hate Los Angeles; but I'm a city boy--I could never imagine myself in any other place but a big city. I grew up in Houston my entire life and during the summers, I got a taste of small-town life when I went back to my hometown in upstate New York. But that was never for me. And although Boston has been great in helping me grow as a person, helping me confront challenges and be apart of different environments and communities, it's not the place I want to be in past graduation.
The other night when Andrew called, he told me he wanted to take a vacation with me to Los Angeles--something he had mentioned once before back in July before him and I fell apart. He's going on vacation in Tennessee sometime soon and I don't know how Los Angeles came up in the subject but he said that he had never gone and that "we should go." The first time he mentioned it back in July, I was all for it. And when he mentioned it again the other night, I couldn't quite give a reaction or come up with a thought. I'm not sure where I stand about his idea of him and I going to Los Angeles on a vacation. And going on a vacation together is a big thing. For me, for me to even considering hanging out with him locally is a big deal. Some things have to happen between him and I before we could ever talk about anything as extreme as taking a vacation together somewhere. He's trying to come back into my life and he's trying to reach out to me. Suggesting that him and I go on vacation together after everything that happened between us, is proof of such.
When I was in high school, I went to Los Angeles for Spring Break with Dylan, Trisha, Christopher, Leia and Matt. At the time, I had no idea that Dylan was gay. I merely thought he was a really cool straight guy who I had fun hanging out with because we had so much in common. It was his and Trisha's idea that I go to Los Angeles with them for a vacation. I snuck away while my mother was out of town on business. And I remember that I was so nervous my mother would find out, that at one point, I almost turned around and went back. But Dylan assured me that I would be fine.
When we got to Los Angeles, I had only been there once before--when I had met Armando. I knew my way around somewhat and since Dylan had lived there, so did he. We went shopping that Friday night, went to a club (yes, I got in--don't ask how) and towards the end of the night, we came home exhausted. I remember venturing into Dylan's room to borrow some lotion when he and I were chatting. I had always had a thing for him because for one, he was incredibly gorgeous and had a great personality. He was funny, charming, was very smart and was just a great guy. While we were watching a movie, I remember him laying on the bed on his stomach without a shirt watching the movie. I remember just sitting on the edge of the bed watching along with him. I think we were watching Final Destination. After drinking all night, I was pretty much spent. There came a point where Dylan made fun of me and I pushed him and he pushed me back and he scratched me. I got slightly annoyed and shrugged it off. I don't remember exactly what I said or what I did, but before I knew it, Dylan kissed me on the lips and told me I was way too cute for my own good.
When I said, "Omg, you must be really drunk to kiss me," he said, "Um, no, I'm not. I know what I did," and I said, "Um, dude, you're straight," and he said, "Um, when did I ever say I was straight? Who told you that? I thought you were such a hottie when I first met you." And before I knew it, I was making out with the man that I had lusted over for three months. There came a point where I was looking up at him from him kissing me and I said, "This so is not happening," and he said, "Believe it. It is." And at the age of 17, I had experienced, for the first time, what it felt like for someone to make love to me. And I remember the next day after Trisha found out, she said, "He's been digging you since that first time you and him hung out and you helped him with Daniel. I thought you knew he liked you."
I know that if I should move to Los Angeles, I could have two really awesome jobs--either in Student Affairs at a university or at Los Angeles International Airport with an airline or the airport itself. Either way, I'm slowly but surely going to make plans to move to Los Angeles within the next year and a half. My mother is all for it and my friends back in Houston are all for it. I am none too surprised that my Boston or New York friends aren't supportive but that's not something that I can really dwell on or focus on. I've made it a goal of mine to play a plan for my move, where I want to go with my career and the rest of my life. Not that I can really plan out of my life, but there's no harm in having goals and following through with them.
Meanwhile, I closed afterHours last night. Wednesday nights are always slow so it wasn't really that busy or that much of a big deal. It was as a date auction and all the proceeds went to help out with victims of Hurricane Katrina. I didn't really attention to what was going on because I wasn't really interested in anything or anyone going on. I chatted with a few people I knew, did what managers and supervisors do and closed up the club and went home. When I got home, I chatted with Canaan a little bit and headed to bed.
Anyways, I'm off to bed. I watched the live version of Will and Grace and it was so fuckin' good. I alsp made my list of people who I want to come to my housewarming party when we finally have it. And I chatted with Dylan, Nicole and Canaan throughout the night. I have work in the morning from 10:30 to 6:30. I spent some time looking at apartments and neighborhoods I want to live in when I move. And I'm gonna do the same tomorrow.
This is what I want. And I'm going to work hard to make it happen.
Goodnight.
The other night when Andrew called, he told me he wanted to take a vacation with me to Los Angeles--something he had mentioned once before back in July before him and I fell apart. He's going on vacation in Tennessee sometime soon and I don't know how Los Angeles came up in the subject but he said that he had never gone and that "we should go." The first time he mentioned it back in July, I was all for it. And when he mentioned it again the other night, I couldn't quite give a reaction or come up with a thought. I'm not sure where I stand about his idea of him and I going to Los Angeles on a vacation. And going on a vacation together is a big thing. For me, for me to even considering hanging out with him locally is a big deal. Some things have to happen between him and I before we could ever talk about anything as extreme as taking a vacation together somewhere. He's trying to come back into my life and he's trying to reach out to me. Suggesting that him and I go on vacation together after everything that happened between us, is proof of such.
When I was in high school, I went to Los Angeles for Spring Break with Dylan, Trisha, Christopher, Leia and Matt. At the time, I had no idea that Dylan was gay. I merely thought he was a really cool straight guy who I had fun hanging out with because we had so much in common. It was his and Trisha's idea that I go to Los Angeles with them for a vacation. I snuck away while my mother was out of town on business. And I remember that I was so nervous my mother would find out, that at one point, I almost turned around and went back. But Dylan assured me that I would be fine.
When we got to Los Angeles, I had only been there once before--when I had met Armando. I knew my way around somewhat and since Dylan had lived there, so did he. We went shopping that Friday night, went to a club (yes, I got in--don't ask how) and towards the end of the night, we came home exhausted. I remember venturing into Dylan's room to borrow some lotion when he and I were chatting. I had always had a thing for him because for one, he was incredibly gorgeous and had a great personality. He was funny, charming, was very smart and was just a great guy. While we were watching a movie, I remember him laying on the bed on his stomach without a shirt watching the movie. I remember just sitting on the edge of the bed watching along with him. I think we were watching Final Destination. After drinking all night, I was pretty much spent. There came a point where Dylan made fun of me and I pushed him and he pushed me back and he scratched me. I got slightly annoyed and shrugged it off. I don't remember exactly what I said or what I did, but before I knew it, Dylan kissed me on the lips and told me I was way too cute for my own good.
When I said, "Omg, you must be really drunk to kiss me," he said, "Um, no, I'm not. I know what I did," and I said, "Um, dude, you're straight," and he said, "Um, when did I ever say I was straight? Who told you that? I thought you were such a hottie when I first met you." And before I knew it, I was making out with the man that I had lusted over for three months. There came a point where I was looking up at him from him kissing me and I said, "This so is not happening," and he said, "Believe it. It is." And at the age of 17, I had experienced, for the first time, what it felt like for someone to make love to me. And I remember the next day after Trisha found out, she said, "He's been digging you since that first time you and him hung out and you helped him with Daniel. I thought you knew he liked you."
I know that if I should move to Los Angeles, I could have two really awesome jobs--either in Student Affairs at a university or at Los Angeles International Airport with an airline or the airport itself. Either way, I'm slowly but surely going to make plans to move to Los Angeles within the next year and a half. My mother is all for it and my friends back in Houston are all for it. I am none too surprised that my Boston or New York friends aren't supportive but that's not something that I can really dwell on or focus on. I've made it a goal of mine to play a plan for my move, where I want to go with my career and the rest of my life. Not that I can really plan out of my life, but there's no harm in having goals and following through with them.
Meanwhile, I closed afterHours last night. Wednesday nights are always slow so it wasn't really that busy or that much of a big deal. It was as a date auction and all the proceeds went to help out with victims of Hurricane Katrina. I didn't really attention to what was going on because I wasn't really interested in anything or anyone going on. I chatted with a few people I knew, did what managers and supervisors do and closed up the club and went home. When I got home, I chatted with Canaan a little bit and headed to bed.
Anyways, I'm off to bed. I watched the live version of Will and Grace and it was so fuckin' good. I alsp made my list of people who I want to come to my housewarming party when we finally have it. And I chatted with Dylan, Nicole and Canaan throughout the night. I have work in the morning from 10:30 to 6:30. I spent some time looking at apartments and neighborhoods I want to live in when I move. And I'm gonna do the same tomorrow.
This is what I want. And I'm going to work hard to make it happen.
Goodnight.