(no subject)
Title: Eager Eyes
Pairing: Akame
Rating: NC-17
Genre: Angst, Smut
Beta: carboncastel
Disclaimer: Please just let them own each other already. I don’t.
Summary: Jin is a creep.
A/N: Birthday gift for haicah16 who has become such a good friend through Twitter. Also, the first chapter of Without You is How I Disappear is out, an NC-17 fic with pairings Akame, MaruDa, RyoDa, and other side pairings. Please check it out!
oOo
I’m coming out of my cage and I’ve been doing just fine.
Jin is a creep. He’s a creep for being here. For being here tonight, in this club that he doesn’t like at all, because they have none of the strong imported stuff that Jin drinks, or the tall, blonde women Jin prefers to watch dancing, or the raucous and agreeable company of his crew. But he is here.
He is here, a fedora low on his head, a shot in his hand waiting to be downed. Jin shrivels in his seat as a few familiar faces walk past him. He doesn’t want to be seen. Not here. Not now.
He shouldn’t be having this trouble at all.
Gotta be down because I want it all.
If he didn’t leave KAT-TUN, he probably wouldn’t have to explain to anyone why he happened to be in the same club as Kamenashi Kazuya right now. Or maybe he would have to, but any made up excuse would be more plausible.
Rather than the truth that he is intently watching Kamenashi sexy dance with some girl right now.
Okay, not some girl. She’s pretty. She’d actually pass Jin’s preference. She’s tall, slender arms and legs, slim waist. She had shoulder length brown hair and she laughs in a way that Jin only sees on women with class. Is this Kamenashi’s girlfriend?
He would know if he didn’t leave. And Jin mentally kicks himself for that thought. Are his dreams of becoming world-famous worth sacrificing just for inside scoop on Kamenashi’s lovelife?
It started out with a kiss. How did it end up like this?
Jin discreetly raises the fedora a bit, so that he could see better. Kamenashi is laughing along with the woman, and fuck do they look sweet, with Kamenashi’s hands on her hips as they continue to dance to the music.
The music turns into something mellow, and Jin’s insides churn as the woman puts her arms around Kamenashi’s nape. Kamenashi smiles. Kamenashi brushes his lips over her cheek.
Kamenashi laughs his innocent and, in Jin’s opinion, childish laugh as a man drifts beside them. A man with short brown hair who -
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
What’s Yamashita doing here?
It was only a kiss. It was only a kiss.
Well if Jin remained still long enough, he shouldn’t be noticed. But that kiss. But it was just on the cheek. Jin briefly revels in the fact that he had kissed Kamenashi on the lips. Once. And it was just for fun, on a dare. But it’s a memory Jin’s going to keep.
Jin swills his next shot around, his eyesight dark and fuzzy as the slow thuds of the sickly love song play on.
“Jin?”
Oh fuck.
Jin looks up. Not that he had a choice.
“Pi,” he greets his best friend noncommittally. Well, Yamashita is used to it.
“What are you doing here?” he sits down at Jin’s table, eyes train intently upon the lines on Jin’s tired face.
Jin grunts. Yamashita is used to Jin’s weird moments as well, so he understood this grunt to mean, “I don’t want to tell you so don’t bother asking again.”
“That girl,” Jin starts, cocking his head in Kamenashi’s direction again. “Who’s she?”
“The one Kame’s dancing with?”
Jin nods before taking a shot. Makes a face.
“She’s Donna.”
Now I’m falling asleep, and she’s calling a cab.
Jin stares at Yamashita for a bit, waiting. But the man says no more.
“And?”
“And what?”
“Are they - you know - ”
YamaPi raises his eyebrows as he tries to read Jin’s thoughts, and then he laughs.
“No, no.”
Jin takes another shot.
“They just met here,” Yamashita says, glancing back at Kamenashi and Donna who have stopped dancing and are now approaching the edge of the dance floor, talking. “But boy are they hitting it off good.”
“What’s her nationality?” Jin asks, trying to sound casual. Uninterested.
Yamashita shrugs.
“Don’t know. Her Japanese is perfect, though.”
While he’s having a smoke, and she’s taking a drag.
Just then, Kamenashi and the woman start walking, falling dangerously out of Jin’s line of sight. The soloist quickly gets up and claps Yamashita on the shoulder.
“Thanks.”
Jin almost runs into them at the exit, since there was a holdup with the people noisy and complaining, but he manages to fall back a couple of people behind, and soon they are moving again. They come out to the street and surprisingly, Kamenashi appears to be car-less tonight. Jin stands in silence a few lampposts down as the idol and his date wait for a cab.
Kamenashi lights a smoke.
Jin is revolted as he watches Donna put an arm around Kamenashi’s waist. She takes the cigarette off his lips and takes a drag, puffing the smoke away from dear Kamenashi’s face.
Fuck. It hurts.
~
Now they’re going to bed, and my stomach is sick.
Jin is a creep. He’s a creep for being here. For being here tonight, on Kamenashi’s lawn, hidden behind well-kept shrubs, watching the slow, leisurely sex that was taking place right before him. Okay, not right before him but in the living room of Kamenashi’s grandiose home, and Jin is stupid to have followed them across town just to watch them have sex. But he is here.
Kamenashi kisses the side of her neck, and she shivers at the touch, squeezing his shoulder gently. Encouragingly. The glass windows of Kamenashi’s living room are soundproof, but Jin is pretty sure that they were both moaning their hearts out.
Jin fishes his lighter from his jacket pocket as he sets a cigarette between his teeth.
And it’s all in my head.
What if he barges in? What if he suddenly enters and confesses to Kame? I mean - hey, they’re still fully clothed. Less awkward when he professes his undying love for his ex-bandmate.
And then Kame would gush and tell him, “Oh my god, me too! I’ve loved you all this time, too!” and they’d live happily ever after.
Or Kame would flip, tell him he’s insane, throw him out of the house, and go back to his splendid time with Donna.
Jin scratches at his elbow as a stray leaf brushes against him. He is so tempted to uproot this plant and smash the pot and -
But she’s touching his chest now.
“Get your hands off him.”
He sounds so gay, but hell, if he weren’t gay, why would he be hiding behind plants to watch the love of his life get it on with someone he met at the club? Jin mutters darkly as Donna slowly unbuttons Kamenashi’s black polo.
She runs a hand over the smooth skin of his neck, down to his shoulders, brushing away the fabric as she does so. Kamenashi smiles. He’s enjoying himself. She’s enjoying him.
He takes off her dress now.
And he’s enjoying her, too.
Kamenashi pulls her closer, places his hands around her back. Reaches for zipper of her little black dress. The sight - the sequence - the series of events. They send chills up Jin’s spine.
Jin watches Donna shiver.
Let me go.
They’re both naked now. In the goddamn living room.
Jin looks down at his spot. Five cigarette butts litter the floor. Some gardener’s going to wonder who the hell killed time here. Oh wait. There are six butts.
Jin didn’t see the sixth, his stupid hard on in the way. Well at least he still gets turned on by het sex. He isn’t so gay for Kamenashi to totally let that go.
I just can’t look, it’s killing me.
They’re on the sofa, and Jin couldn’t see much, except that Kamenashi is on top, his rather muscle-y arm gripping the edge of the seat as his sweaty shoulders move back and forth, back and forth.
Back and forth.
Kamenashi throws his head back, Jin sees a soundless cry of pleasure, just as white knuckles that ended with finely painted red nails grip the edge of the couch as well, tense and rather shaking.
Kamenashi looks back down, shows a mischievous smirk, and then a hopelessly enamored look crosses his face. Is he in love with this woman?
And taking control.
Jin snorts his disbelief, just as Kamenashi dips his head for a slow - excruciatingly slow - kiss as the two of them come. Jin could tell by the way Kamenashi’s arms tremble. By the way Donna’s hands move from the couch to Kamenashi’s shoulders, clutching and scratching at them like her life depended on it.
Jin snorts again, annoyed with what he just saw. With what he just witnessed. Oh. Wait. You don’t snort when there are tears in your eyes.
Jin sniffed.
~
Jealousy, turning saints into the sea, swimming through sick lullabies.
Jin is a creep. He’s a creep for being here. For being here tonight, in this empty street that reeks of dried piss, this filthy street with garbage littering every few meters or so, this bare street that reminds him of how much of a loser he is for not going home tonight with someone hot. Or someone pretty.
Or Kamenashi.
But he is here.
Choking on your alibis, but it’s just the price I pay.
Jin is a grown man. He knows what he’s feeling. He knows what he wants. He knows very well why his life’s a mess. Well, not so much his life. Fuck, his life is awesome. Anyone would die to be in his place, touring around the world and making his dreams come true one by one.
It’s more of his mind that is a mess. His stupid mind. His mind that doesn’t want to forget Kamenashi.
Jin kicks an empty beer can as he walks down the street.
Destiny is calling me. Open up my eager eyes.
Jin shrugs.
His eyes are dry now. To hell with Kamenashi. To hell with disappointment. Jin could do so much better. He could do so much more.
“Where’ve you been, dude?” Josh greets as Jin enters his apartment.
He now feels tired and lethargic.
“Some show,” Jin mumbles, collapsing on Josh’s couch.
It smells of beer and stale popcorn. Jin looks up as Josh comes back into the living room, beer cans fresh out of the fridge in his hands.
“I’ve got a new idea for a song.”
‘Cause I’m Mr. Brightside.
oOo
It’s so emo IDEK. Italicized lines are from the song Mr. Brightside by The Killers.
What’s Up with Akame blog is up! Visit the blog HERE!
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