5&6 (Part 3)
Massu was far too embarrassed to form coherent sentences. It felt like anything he could possibly say or do would be ridiculed by the man who helped him home. He could hardly remember the ride to the hotel; only a couple of adverts that dotted the metal walls and the ghostly scream of the train as it passed through stations and tunnels. He also remembered the faint smell of cologne on Tegoshi’s shirt, and since the sweet scent was just as pungent as every other sensation on the train, he started to question his earlier statement.
Surely this guy isn’t just a figment of my imagination?
Nishikido had described the man perfectly; small, slight and dainty with fragile features. It all added up, except that Tegoshi, the ghost of Japan, had not disappeared from Masuda’s sight yet. From the corner of his eye, Massu glanced at the smaller man frequently to check whether he had dissipated into thin air or not. It never happened.
From meeting Tegoshi Yuya at the station and arriving at the hotel room, Tegoshi seemed to be a normal human being. Masuda was sceptical of entering his room with such a man as Tegoshi, but the hesitation was quickly killed off by another excruciating headache. He crumpled to the pavement just outside the hotel, but before he could hit the concrete surface Tegoshi managed to catch him.
“You’re really not well, are you?” Tegoshi grimaced as he picked Masuda up. “You’re lucky that I recognise you, otherwise I wouldn’t be helping you so much!”
Masuda groaned. He definitely didn’t feel lucky. He’d never experienced two headaches in one day, and he was sure that Tegoshi was to blame. What else was different from any other day? Despite the stinging pain he was under, it reassured Massu that the ‘ghost’ he’d encountered would have a cure for his frequent headaches.
Since Massu was focused intently on the pain in his head, Tegoshi had pulled him up to his door without him noticing. Massu dawdled over to the door and jabbed his room key into the lock. He glanced at Tegoshi from his shoulder and managed to pull a few thoughts together through the pain. This man has killed people. Is it right to let him into my room?
He sighed and pushed the heavy door open. Even though Tegoshi was a dangerous man, Massu was confident that he didn’t want to kill a man such as himself. He’d only broken the law once in his life, and unless drinking alcohol underage was punishable by death, he was pretty sure that he was safe. Still, out of fear, he looked at Tegoshi again as he held the door open and pursed his lips.
Tegoshi sighed and rolled his eyes. “Look, I know you’re wary of me, but you’ve got nothing to worry about. I won’t hurt you!”
Massu thought about it. He rolled his tongue around his mouth and pondered over the negatives and positives of letting such a man into his hotel room. Before he could say any of them out loud, Tegoshi pushed him inside and growled. “Ok fine. If you don’t go inside then I’ll hurt you! I’m not joking!”
The force of the push almost sent Massu onto his knees again, but thankfully he kept his balance. Tegoshi switched the lights on and roamed around the room as if it was his own. Slowly, Masuda crept towards the bed in the centre and plonked himself down on it. Tegoshi’s activity confused Massu, so he observed his movements while he rubbed his pained head. “Where the hell do you keep medicine? Do you even have medicine? If you get these migraines all the time then surely you have medicine?! Do I have to go out and get medicine because if I do…”
“Shhh.” Massu hushed quietly. He closed his eyes and put a finger to his lips. The hush was loud enough for Tegoshi to hear, so he stopped by the window and put his hands to his hips in anger. It wasn’t uncommon for Tegoshi to have a strop when he was out with his friends, but that night he was with a man he hardly knew. Even though the strops he pulled were normally comical, it was peculiar for Yuya to pull such an act with a stranger. Once he realised what he’d done he loosened his stance and tried to shake off his tantrum.
“I’m sorry.” Tegoshi giggled. “I guess that didn’t help your headache much…”
“It’s not really that.” Massu sighed. He flopped his whole body onto the soft mattress and stared at the ceiling as he spoke. “I’m used to the headaches. No medicine stops them. Doctors don’t understand why I get them. They’re a total mystery, just like you I guess…”
The sentence brought silence to the room. The distant sounds from the train station helped sooth Masuda’s nerves; it reminded him that he was in his room and away from the harsh activity of night time rush hour. He closed his eyes and waited for Tegoshi to respond, but he couldn’t care less whether he replied or not. Peace was gradually restoring in his brain and the screams were quieter than they had been before.
Tegoshi sat down on the chair next to the window and bit his lip.
“I think I’m a mystery to myself…” He sighed. “It might sound strange but I think my life is different from everyone else’s because of my accident…”
“Accident?” Massu repeated. He snapped his eyes open and frowned at the statement. Tegoshi perked up at the repeated word and cocked his head to the side.
“Yes. You see, I remember you from somewhere, but I have no idea where from. But a few years ago I was involved in a car accident and I can’t remember anything beyond that point in time. I can’t even remember what happened, but my boss saved me and told me the whole story.” Tegoshi stared out at the dazzling lights of Tokyo and his reflection that shimmered over the buildings. “He’s a good man; he saved me, let me live with him and gave me a job. The only problem is that he doesn’t want me to search for my lost memories. Apparently I’m better off without them, but I disagree. After all, we learn from our pasts, do we not?”
“I guess so.” Massu replied. He soaked in all the information that Tegoshi spoke of like a sponge. He didn’t want to leave a drop of fact to dry, so when Tegoshi said a sentence he scanned over it again so that it would stick into his brain.
“I think that before my accident I was a normal person; I might have had a family, I might have been a school student, I might have had a job and I might even have had a lover.” He scratched his head and pulled a face. “But now I’m different. Everyone says I’m a monster but I feel like I’m living on a cloud. I float around this city in a daze while everyone gets on with their own lives. When I started working for Koga it felt like I was in a dream world, and I even wondered whether I was actually alive. If I’d been in a horrible car crash then maybe I had died and gone to a weird world where killing another person was perfectly acceptable…”
Massu kept quiet. He waited for Tegoshi to continue, but it took a long time. He wanted to look at the smaller man to see if he was ok, but the idea of such an action scared him. Maybe Tegoshi didn’t want his support? Maybe it was safer to allow Tegoshi to spill as much as he wanted to and then let him leave. He felt like he was handling a frail butterfly; he desperately wanted to grab hold of it, but he had to be delicate to keep it alive.
“Do you understand that, despite murder being a terrible act, its great proof that we are alive? It’s the only thing that reminds me of where I am. Plus if Koga says that such a man deserves to die then I couldn’t possibly disagree. He is a clever man and I admire him for all that he has done for me. Do you know how I stay a mystery from the police? Well, I guess it’s a secret, but it’s such a crazy excuse that no one would believe it even if I went to the police and admitted my crimes!”
“You mean how you disappear into thin air?” Masuda asked. Tegoshi seemed to have brightened up, so he sat up and looked at him. His somewhat feminine features were lightly lit by the lights outside and coloured his face warmly. For some reason it pleased Masuda, and he was satisfied to simply stare at Yuya while he spoke.
“Yeah.” Tegoshi sighed happily. “To be honest, even I don’t understand it, but what I do know is that it’s science that only Koga understands. He really is amazing. I feel safe with him even if he does stop me from learning about my life.”
“If you feel safe with him, then why did you come to find me?” Massu asked quietly. He narrowed his eyes as he thought for a reasonable answer to his question, but he didn’t quite understand Tegoshi’s actions. “You approached me because you recognise me, but won’t Koga be angry about that?”
“He won’t find out.” Tegoshi smiled sweetly. “And even if he does, I’m prepared to face the consequences.”
“What are the consequences?” Masuda asked nervously. A man whose sole job was to order a murder would surely be ruthless with his punishments. Tegoshi smiled at Massu again and shrugged.
“It’s not pleasant, but nothing that I haven’t already faced before.” He shook his head and waved a hand to dismiss the question. “Anyway, he won’t find out about this meeting. Please, can’t you tell me anything about yourself?”
Massu’s eyes spaced out as he searched his weary brain for information. He’d focused so intently on Tegoshi Yuya that he’d almost forgotten about his own life. He hummed out loud for a few seconds until he found the best place to start from: the beginning.
“Well, ever since I was little I’ve enjoyed travelling. My mother and father are very rich, and they travel a lot too. Unfortunately I’ve never travelled with them; all they do is leave me here with a bundle of cash and explore the world by themselves. Every now and then they return to Japan to see how I am, remind me that they love me and then leave. It’s not much but it keeps me happy. Because of this I never leave Japan, but I travel all over the country and meet different people. People are interesting, don’t you think?” Tegoshi nodded seriously and let Massu continue. “I know lots of people, but I get restless and leave them behind. Despite knowing so many people I don’t tend to forget about anyone, which is why I don’t understand why I recognise you.”
“So you travel Japan, meet people and then move on?” Tegoshi pondered aloud, but Masuda felt the need to give the statement a nod of approval. “Isn’t that lonely? Don’t you want to settle down and find someone?”
Masuda shrugged.
“The thought kind of scares me.” He admitted. Tegoshi bit his lip and nodded slowly.
“Ah I see.” He responded. The way that he was sat reminded Massu of a psychiatrist, but since Tegoshi hardly knew Masuda it was slightly annoying. “It doesn’t sound like you’ve been given a good example of ‘commitment’ anyway…”
“What do you mean?” Masuda asked defensively. Maybe Tegoshi wasn’t aware, but he didn’t normally talk about his life to complete strangers. Recognisable or not, Tegoshi was still rather intrusive.
“Well your parents don’t stick around either.” Tegoshi explained, hardly affected by Masuda’s defence. “I’m just saying, you’re practically living the same lives!”
Massu shook the comment off and quickly changed the subject. It wasn’t an area he had touched on before, and he was pretty sure he didn’t want to start it with Tegoshi.
“Well what about you? How are you going to commit to someone if you lead such a dangerous life?” He asked quickly. Despite asking a rash question there was still a hint of uneasiness in Masuda’s tone. Tegoshi detected it and smiled. Massu may have asked the question as an attempt to counter act Tegoshi’s intrusion, but he found his paranoia cute.
“I only really care about Koga.” Tegoshi replied. “I don’t really understand my feelings, but I have dedicated my life to him.”
“That sounds…” Massu mumbled. It was hard to think of a word to describe such a frightening prospect, but when he found it he couldn’t help but say it out loud. “That sounds really restricted.”
Tegoshi scowled. It looked like he’d eaten something sour. Did Masuda’s opinion really upset him that much?
“Not at all!” Tegoshi snapped. “I owe him my life! Do you think I should just abandon him!?”
“Well… abandon isn’t the right word…” Masuda explained. “What I mean is that you shouldn’t dedicate everything to him…”
They stared at each other for what felt like forever. Tegoshi’s sour expression was beginning to bring a bad taste to Masuda’s mouth, so he glanced away from the penetrating glare and sighed. “I won’t go any further; I’d rather not get into your own personal affairs. We hardly know each other yet we’re talking so deeply.”
Tegoshi’s glare turned into a sleepy smile. The change brought confusion to Masuda’s mind, but he dismissed it and decided to be thankful that the other man was finally content with the conversation.
“You’re easy to talk to.” Tegoshi explained. “Even though we disagree, I want to know everything about you because I know you’re important in some way.”
Important? Massu had to disagree. From his earliest memory he couldn’t remember ever being important. He’d lived a mediocre life; pretty boring, pretty quiet and pretty lonely. Even though his parents would remind him that they loved him from time to time, he’d never been important enough for them to stay in Japan and prove that they cared. But Massu didn’t care anymore; being important wasn’t important anyway. He was happy to live a quiet life without any restrictions of relationships or family bonds.
Tegoshi found himself staring dozily at Massu as the other man thought to himself with a disgruntled scowl. After a while of blank staring he snapped out of his daze and realised that his mind had been completely empty for a long time. What was so special about Masuda Takahisa? He’d hoped that there would be something in Masuda’s past that would spark an idea in his mind, but nothing was recognisable at all.
“Anyway, Masuda.” Tegoshi announced as he stood himself up from his chair. “It would be best if I left; Koga will be wondering where I am.” He walked over to the door but suddenly stopped in the middle of the room. “Oh, and is your head feeling any better?”
Massu nodded and glanced up at Tegoshi from where he was sat on the bed.
“It doesn’t seem like anyone has an explanation for these headaches.” Massu sighed. “I thought that you might be linked to them but… you’re very different to how I thought you would be.”
“I’m sorry to disappoint.” Tegoshi mumbled. A slight smirk appeared at the side of his mouth, which proved to Massu that the smaller man wasn’t being too serious. “I want to meet you again somehow, but it seems too risky with…”
“You mean when your boss is watching what you do?” Massu asked. Tegoshi nodded and Massu sighed at the response. Who would have thought that the famous murderer of Japan would ask for his company despite the consequences?
“I’m sorry.” Tegoshi apologised. “I know how weird this must be for you; spending time with a person like me. Maybe you’re scared of me. If you don’t want me to approach you anymore, just tell me and I’ll stop.”
Silence. Massu didn’t know what to say. His endeavour to find Tegoshi Yuya and learn his story had become a little bit too successful for his own liking. He had sat in his own hotel room with a murderer, a status that could easily be approved by Masuda, and talked over both their lives as if they were childhood friends desperate to catch up with each others’ stories.
But how could he say no? He could feel the faint link just as easily as Tegoshi could. Something was missing, a bond maybe, and even though Massu had spent his whole life running away from such responsibilities he couldn’t help but be pulled into the mystery like a scrap of metal being pulled into a magnetic field.
“I’ll take that as a no.” Tegoshi interrupted Massu’s thoughts and walked off to the door. Massu snapped out of his daydream and jumped to his feet.
“If you come to find me, wouldn’t it be easier to make a date?” Massu asked nervously. Tegoshi came to a sudden halt and span round to face Massu. He had a sinister grin on his face, one that Massu didn’t quiet appreciate but was definitely meant to cause humour and not fear.
“Date?” Tegoshi repeated. He pulled a face and moaned a little. “It’s hard to think of anything right now but… don’t worry about it. I’ll find you. I’m good at this stuff.”
With that Tegoshi opened the door and waved. “Nice to meet you Masuda Takahisa. Try not to be so nervous next time!”
The door slammed shut and Massu slumped back onto the bed. Did that meeting really happen? He wiped his forehead and mumbled to himself like a madman. Tegoshi wasn’t as threatening as he thought he would be, but evidently the fact that they seemed to recognise each other had saved Massu from any violent behaviour.
He rushed towards the window and watched the entrance of the hotel. Any minute now Tegoshi would walk through the exit and wander off into the shadows. No one knew what kind of man had stayed in the hotel, but something told Massu that it really didn’t matter. There was more to Tegoshi than what the newspapers wrote.
After ten minutes, Tegoshi still hadn’t left the hotel. Massu frowned. Surely it would take Tegoshi a few minutes to leave the building? Ater 15 minutes he still hadn’t seen him, and even after 20 minutes there was no sign of Tegoshi. There’s no other way out of here. Massu thought to himself. He must still be in the building.
He left his room and took the elevator to the reception area. When he left the small box elevator his eyes widened at what he found at the office. Police had swamped the area and the receptionist was sat on a chair while being questioned by a couple of officers. Massu slid away to the corridor that led to the ground floor rooms and hid behind the walls.
“I don’t know anything else.” The receptionist explained desperately. “Just as the man was about to leave he disappeared into thin air! I’m sure it will be on the security cameras!”
Massu slapped a hand to his mouth. Tegoshi had told him about the ability to disappear, but he’d quite happily confessed to Massu that it was Koga’s trick, not his own.
“We’ll check the tape as soon as we can.” One of the officers replied calmly. “Could you tell me which room he was staying in?”
“I think he came in with someone else…” The receptionist mumbled to herself. “I can’t remember who it was but it should be on the camera as well. I will check for you.”
Massu rushed towards the elevator again. Luckily, no one had noticed the activity by the elevator, but once he had pressed the button for his floor he was adamant that he would take the stairs out of the hotel and leave as quietly as possible. Hopefully he could get away before anyone realised that Tegoshi had been to his room.
He shut his eyes and leant against the wall. There was no use; he was definitely going to be found out by the police. Could he even make it out of the hotel? He guessed there was no other option than to be as fast as possible and place his bet. If he managed to get out he would run as far away as possible.
Who knew that one conversation would get him into so much trouble.
~*~
Disappearing from the hotel reception was just like stepping into a new room. Tegoshi hardly noticed where he was until a wall stopped him from walking any further, and when he noticed who’s dark room he had found himself in he felt sick crawl up his throat.
A small part of him wondered if he had any time to run away from the flat, but realistically he knew that it was far too late for that. Just as he expected, a hand grabbed his shirt and dragged him backwards.
“You thought I wouldn’t notice that you’d gone to find that man?” Koga boomed. He pulled Tegoshi around so that they faced each other, but Tegoshi kept his head down in fear. He’d glanced at Koga’s scowl; deep red, intense and so furious that the deep lines on his brow looked like they would burn into his skin. “My decision to keep an eye on you after you talked to me in the park was a good one after all. You went against what I said and searched for him!”
“H-he’s not a bad person…” Tegoshi attempted to reason. “He can’t possibly…”
Smack. Koga punched Tegoshi and kicked him in the stomach. The attack pushed Tegoshi to the floor and the pain caused him to curl up and whine.
“You’ll listen to Masuda, but you won’t listen to me!” Koga shouted. He gave Tegoshi another kick and knelt to the floor. “He will give you anything; any bullshit story he’s made up on a whim! You were lucky he gave you his real name!” He hissed so evilly that it gave Tegoshi the shivers and almost defeated his pain. “I told you that Masuda is a man that you’re better off forgetting, but if you don’t care about your own safety then your punishment will be quite enjoyable.”
Koga grabbed Tegoshi’s arm and dragged him along the apartment towards the opposite door to his bedroom. Tegoshi tried to scramble away but he was far too weak; the blows to his body hardly changed the fact that Koga had complete power over him.
The room he entered was completely empty apart from a small hatch in the blank white wall to the right. He yanked it open and threw Tegoshi inside the dark, miniscule, box-like closet. Tegoshi hit his back on the back wall and clawed his way back towards Koga.
“Koga please!” Tegoshi cried. “I-I know you’re angry, but why can’t you tell me about my life?! What’s so bad about Masuda?!”
“While you’re in here…” Koga started, his face just as blank as it would normally be in a casual conversation. “think about this: Whatever punishment I will ever throw at you, it will never be as bad as what Masuda did to you before your accident.”
Tegoshi backed off. Was that true? He hit the sides of the closet like box and felt his lip tremble. Koga knew exactly what Tegoshi was scared of, but being locked in a tiny pitch black space was something that Tegoshi presumed everyone would be terrified of.
“H-how long do I have to be in here?” He asked as he voice broke in terror.
“I’ll decide that later.” Koga growled. “If you see Masuda again, I swear, the punishment will get worse.”
Once Koga disappeared from the entrance Tegoshi took a quick look at the last few ounces of light he’d see for a while. A few seconds later, the door slammed shut and left him alone with complete darkness and his tears.
Slam.
.