001. FREEFALL
Title: Freefall
Start Date/End Date: 27 august i started it and didn't do so much~ and then today (29 august) i finished it~
Author: theeastsea //supergeneration
Pairing: Youngwoon/Jungsoo (implied Kangin/Sungmin)
Rating: angst, yeah D:
Word Count: 1712
Archive: here
Disclaimer: i don't own them T___T; i only own the story~
A/N: well... i don't really like kangteuk... but i liked what i wrote myself... ;_; i just.. ish. why can't i write happy endings >___>:
i hope you'll... like it~ and yes. this as also nothing to do with freefall.. but just.. enjoy it XD
“I HATE YOU!” the words clinging in your ears, never leaving you. You can still see him crying, you can still remember how he yelled at you, you can still remember how you tried to embrace him but he just pushed you away.
You’re laying on your bed. Sighing, you don’t know what to do. It’s a holiday and no work.
You look beside you in the bed, you feel like screaming, but it’s just 7 am on a Saturday, so you’re holding it in.
You can hear the phone ring, signal after signal, you want it to stop, to go away. But it keeps ringing. You’re slowly getting up from the big bed and slowly lift the phone. You can hear a happy voice clinging in your ears, you sigh, you’re too tired to even be happy. It’s been like this for a year.
“Hyuuu~ng~ What are you doing?~ Are you awake?~”
“Hello Sungmin” you sigh again, why does he never stop ringing?
“Aaah~ Hyuuung~ Don’t be so depressed~ Lets go out somewhere~”
“No thanks. It’s just 7am. And I’m to tired.” you can hear a big sigh in the phone
“Hyung. You should really get a life after---” you throw the phone on the floor. You look at it as it had some disease.
You can still hear the little voice talking on the phone. Begging you to come back. You shrug your whole body. And in some way, the little voice on the other side, just says goodbye and hangs up.
You know you’ve hurt him. Like this and many other times.
You slowly think back a year ago. That year. You can remember the first time you met him.
His smile, his laugh, his body. It’s like it was yesterday. But now he’s gone. Gone forever.
He won’t come back to you. Never.
You slowly remember that day, when he confessed. You smile to yourself. You collapse down on the floor and remember it. Oh, sweet memories.
flash back.
“Hyuuuuuuuuuuuung! Wait for me! Don’t run away!” you ran after him, you watched him run and laugh.
“Hyung! It’s not fun! What if you fall?!” and then, you don’t see him. You look around and you hear a hard laugh coming from the ground. There he is. Laughing. The way you liked it best.
You sit there beside him. You sit like that for a while, there’s a silence. And then you can feel two arms embrace you from the back. You jump up a little. It feels like those arms never would let go. You didn’t want them to either. You can feel his lips slowly kissing you on your neck. It feels good, you turn around, and by mistake your lips smacks together. But he doesn’t care, you can feel how he slowly separate his lips and how his tongue starts to play with yours. Your whole spin shiver. You can feel how his arms embracing you even harder, now you know, that he never would let go.
You can feel his hands go under your t-shirt, how he slowly-
You stop, you push him away blushing. At first you can se that he looks worried. But then he see that you were blushing he just laughs and hugs you again.
Then you hear those words. Those beautiful words.
“Youngwoon-ah~ I love you~” you can’t help but smile, you look him the eyes, you can see that he’s serious.
“I love you to” you can see how his lips forms to a smile, he kiss you again. You can see he’s happy.
end of flashback
You can feel a wet tear roll down on your cheeks. You don’t want to dry them. You want to cry.
It’s okay to cry.
But you haven’t heard that somebody has entered the room. Until you can feel two arms embrace you from behind. Exactly like that time. You want to believe it’s him. When you turn around you see a worried face looking at you.
You push yourself away from him. You don’t want to hurt him. But then he just smiles. He smiles for so long you wonder if he isn’t tired at smiling.
Your tears has stopped. But even though this little boy smiles, you can see tears run down on his cheeks.
You knew it, you knew it all along. He was hurt.
You can’t help it but put your arms around him, embrace him. Saying calming words in his ears.
You slowly starts to kiss him, on his neck, on his mouth. You embrace him harder, and deepens the kiss.
Your tongue playing with his. You can hear him moan. You feel all warm and bubbly inside.
You wanted to do this, do something you haven’t done in a year. You slowly takes of his t-shirt and yours.
Then you slowly unbutton his pants as he kisses you. Something inside you tells you to stop. But your lust is taking over you.
Everything goes on. You unbutton your own pants too, he kisses you in the neck, slowly, letting his tongue play.
Then there he is, on the floor, half naked in front of you. You lifts him up, he’s still in his own world kissing you.
You lay him down on the bed. You look at him laying there for a while. Then you lay there on top of him. You don’t remember how, but both of you are naked. He looks at you with his eyes. His big shining eyes.
You feel your whole body just want to take him now and fast.
You start to kiss him, you kiss him slowly, playing with his tongue. You can feel his hands start to work. You moan, but deepens the kiss and you start to work with your hands. It feels good. You never want it to end.
You wake up alone in the bed. You can see his clothes are gone. You go up from bed, you can see a note on the table.
“I have work today hyung~ Sorry for not waking you up, but you were so cute sleeping~ There’s breakfast on the table~ ^^v"
You put down the note, you slowly remember your night. It was good. But you regret it. You walks to the kitchen, there you see some breakfast. You sit down and starts to eat.
When you’ve eaten up, you just walks away from the kitchen, without dishing.
You walked to the bathroom, jumped into the shower.
You can feel the water pouring down on you. Your can’t feel that tears are running down on your cheeks.
But then you collapse in the shower, you’re sitting there, feeling the water pour down on your body.
After one hour in the shower you walks to your room, you walks to your closet, you open one of the drawers and then you see the photo. The photo of you and him. You hold it in your hands, puts it against your heart, holding it tight. You would never let go. You put it away from a moment, you put on clothes, takes the photo and decide to go out and walk a little.
You slowly opens the door out. The sun is shining, you look at the people passing by.
flash back.
“Hyung… What are you doing?” you looks at him he just laughs
“I’m looking at people who are passing by~”
“Why?” you heard yourself inside your head, you sounded like a kid.
“Because I like it~”
You just looked at him, for a long time. Then you joined him looking at people.
end of flash back.
You understood now why he liked it, it made you calm.
You starts to walk, what you don’t see is that you’re walking to the cemetery. You slowly catches your breath and walks trough it.
flash back.
“I HATE YOU!” you look at the tears pouring down on his cheeks.
You just look at him. His eyes were red from all the crying. You wanted to embrace him, but he just pushed you away.
“Hyung.. I-”
“STOP IT!” you see him collapse on the floor crying, you run towards him and embrace him tight.
You whisper calming words in his ear. You want him to calm himself down.
“Why… Why Youngwoon,,,? Why?”
“I’m sorry… It was just one thing…”
“ONE THING?!” he looked at you with disappointed eyes.
You’ve hurt him. You want him to forgive you. You want to beg for forgiveness. But you can’t.
“Hyung… Calm down… It’ll never happen again… I promise…”
“But what the hell was with ‘Kangin‘? What the hell? He even calls you a DIFFERENT name! Don’t you get it?! He loves you! You knew it right?! That was why you did it with him?!”
“Hyung… Please, he doesn’t love me… And we have known each other since we were kids. It’s just a childhood name. Nothing more..”
“Why did you do it.. Why did you betray me… Am I not good enough..?” you shrug your head
“No hyung! You are more than enough!”
"Then why… did you do it? Why…”
“Hyung-”
“STOP HYUNG ME!” he brakes the embrace. He stands up looking down at you.
“Kim Youngwoon… I love you..” and then he ran away… forever.
Some days later on the news, there was news about a car crash. There was only one dead. You look at the person they are trying to take out from the car. You drops your glass you were holding in your hand. You look again, and then again. Your eyes are wide. You can feel the tears pouring down. The salt tears.
You looks at the name… Looks again… You have stopped breathing.
‘Park Jungsoo’
end of flash back.
You look at the grave in front of you. The name is running through your head. You’ve bought some flowers that you lay on the grave. The tears are pouring down. You sit down in front of the grave, you start to laugh.
“You know what hyung?” you laugh
“Yesterday I was with Sungmin… Do you remember him?”
You looks at the grave. The rain start to pour down. You just sit there.
“Hyung… I really miss you…” your tears mixes with the rain
“Hyung… Please come back… I can’t live without you… I’m all messed up..."
Start Date/End Date: 27 august i started it and didn't do so much~ and then today (29 august) i finished it~
Author: theeastsea //supergeneration
Pairing: Youngwoon/Jungsoo (implied Kangin/Sungmin)
Rating: angst, yeah D:
Word Count: 1712
Archive: here
Disclaimer: i don't own them T___T; i only own the story~
A/N: well... i don't really like kangteuk... but i liked what i wrote myself... ;_; i just.. ish. why can't i write happy endings >___>:
i hope you'll... like it~ and yes. this as also nothing to do with freefall.. but just.. enjoy it XD
“I HATE YOU!” the words clinging in your ears, never leaving you. You can still see him crying, you can still remember how he yelled at you, you can still remember how you tried to embrace him but he just pushed you away.
You’re laying on your bed. Sighing, you don’t know what to do. It’s a holiday and no work.
You look beside you in the bed, you feel like screaming, but it’s just 7 am on a Saturday, so you’re holding it in.
You can hear the phone ring, signal after signal, you want it to stop, to go away. But it keeps ringing. You’re slowly getting up from the big bed and slowly lift the phone. You can hear a happy voice clinging in your ears, you sigh, you’re too tired to even be happy. It’s been like this for a year.
“Hyuuu~ng~ What are you doing?~ Are you awake?~”
“Hello Sungmin” you sigh again, why does he never stop ringing?
“Aaah~ Hyuuung~ Don’t be so depressed~ Lets go out somewhere~”
“No thanks. It’s just 7am. And I’m to tired.” you can hear a big sigh in the phone
“Hyung. You should really get a life after---” you throw the phone on the floor. You look at it as it had some disease.
You can still hear the little voice talking on the phone. Begging you to come back. You shrug your whole body. And in some way, the little voice on the other side, just says goodbye and hangs up.
You know you’ve hurt him. Like this and many other times.
You slowly think back a year ago. That year. You can remember the first time you met him.
His smile, his laugh, his body. It’s like it was yesterday. But now he’s gone. Gone forever.
He won’t come back to you. Never.
You slowly remember that day, when he confessed. You smile to yourself. You collapse down on the floor and remember it. Oh, sweet memories.
flash back.
“Hyuuuuuuuuuuuung! Wait for me! Don’t run away!” you ran after him, you watched him run and laugh.
“Hyung! It’s not fun! What if you fall?!” and then, you don’t see him. You look around and you hear a hard laugh coming from the ground. There he is. Laughing. The way you liked it best.
You sit there beside him. You sit like that for a while, there’s a silence. And then you can feel two arms embrace you from the back. You jump up a little. It feels like those arms never would let go. You didn’t want them to either. You can feel his lips slowly kissing you on your neck. It feels good, you turn around, and by mistake your lips smacks together. But he doesn’t care, you can feel how he slowly separate his lips and how his tongue starts to play with yours. Your whole spin shiver. You can feel how his arms embracing you even harder, now you know, that he never would let go.
You can feel his hands go under your t-shirt, how he slowly-
You stop, you push him away blushing. At first you can se that he looks worried. But then he see that you were blushing he just laughs and hugs you again.
Then you hear those words. Those beautiful words.
“Youngwoon-ah~ I love you~” you can’t help but smile, you look him the eyes, you can see that he’s serious.
“I love you to” you can see how his lips forms to a smile, he kiss you again. You can see he’s happy.
end of flashback
You can feel a wet tear roll down on your cheeks. You don’t want to dry them. You want to cry.
It’s okay to cry.
But you haven’t heard that somebody has entered the room. Until you can feel two arms embrace you from behind. Exactly like that time. You want to believe it’s him. When you turn around you see a worried face looking at you.
You push yourself away from him. You don’t want to hurt him. But then he just smiles. He smiles for so long you wonder if he isn’t tired at smiling.
Your tears has stopped. But even though this little boy smiles, you can see tears run down on his cheeks.
You knew it, you knew it all along. He was hurt.
You can’t help it but put your arms around him, embrace him. Saying calming words in his ears.
You slowly starts to kiss him, on his neck, on his mouth. You embrace him harder, and deepens the kiss.
Your tongue playing with his. You can hear him moan. You feel all warm and bubbly inside.
You wanted to do this, do something you haven’t done in a year. You slowly takes of his t-shirt and yours.
Then you slowly unbutton his pants as he kisses you. Something inside you tells you to stop. But your lust is taking over you.
Everything goes on. You unbutton your own pants too, he kisses you in the neck, slowly, letting his tongue play.
Then there he is, on the floor, half naked in front of you. You lifts him up, he’s still in his own world kissing you.
You lay him down on the bed. You look at him laying there for a while. Then you lay there on top of him. You don’t remember how, but both of you are naked. He looks at you with his eyes. His big shining eyes.
You feel your whole body just want to take him now and fast.
You start to kiss him, you kiss him slowly, playing with his tongue. You can feel his hands start to work. You moan, but deepens the kiss and you start to work with your hands. It feels good. You never want it to end.
You wake up alone in the bed. You can see his clothes are gone. You go up from bed, you can see a note on the table.
“I have work today hyung~ Sorry for not waking you up, but you were so cute sleeping~ There’s breakfast on the table~ ^^v"
You put down the note, you slowly remember your night. It was good. But you regret it. You walks to the kitchen, there you see some breakfast. You sit down and starts to eat.
When you’ve eaten up, you just walks away from the kitchen, without dishing.
You walked to the bathroom, jumped into the shower.
You can feel the water pouring down on you. Your can’t feel that tears are running down on your cheeks.
But then you collapse in the shower, you’re sitting there, feeling the water pour down on your body.
After one hour in the shower you walks to your room, you walks to your closet, you open one of the drawers and then you see the photo. The photo of you and him. You hold it in your hands, puts it against your heart, holding it tight. You would never let go. You put it away from a moment, you put on clothes, takes the photo and decide to go out and walk a little.
You slowly opens the door out. The sun is shining, you look at the people passing by.
flash back.
“Hyung… What are you doing?” you looks at him he just laughs
“I’m looking at people who are passing by~”
“Why?” you heard yourself inside your head, you sounded like a kid.
“Because I like it~”
You just looked at him, for a long time. Then you joined him looking at people.
end of flash back.
You understood now why he liked it, it made you calm.
You starts to walk, what you don’t see is that you’re walking to the cemetery. You slowly catches your breath and walks trough it.
flash back.
“I HATE YOU!” you look at the tears pouring down on his cheeks.
You just look at him. His eyes were red from all the crying. You wanted to embrace him, but he just pushed you away.
“Hyung.. I-”
“STOP IT!” you see him collapse on the floor crying, you run towards him and embrace him tight.
You whisper calming words in his ear. You want him to calm himself down.
“Why… Why Youngwoon,,,? Why?”
“I’m sorry… It was just one thing…”
“ONE THING?!” he looked at you with disappointed eyes.
You’ve hurt him. You want him to forgive you. You want to beg for forgiveness. But you can’t.
“Hyung… Calm down… It’ll never happen again… I promise…”
“But what the hell was with ‘Kangin‘? What the hell? He even calls you a DIFFERENT name! Don’t you get it?! He loves you! You knew it right?! That was why you did it with him?!”
“Hyung… Please, he doesn’t love me… And we have known each other since we were kids. It’s just a childhood name. Nothing more..”
“Why did you do it.. Why did you betray me… Am I not good enough..?” you shrug your head
“No hyung! You are more than enough!”
"Then why… did you do it? Why…”
“Hyung-”
“STOP HYUNG ME!” he brakes the embrace. He stands up looking down at you.
“Kim Youngwoon… I love you..” and then he ran away… forever.
Some days later on the news, there was news about a car crash. There was only one dead. You look at the person they are trying to take out from the car. You drops your glass you were holding in your hand. You look again, and then again. Your eyes are wide. You can feel the tears pouring down. The salt tears.
You looks at the name… Looks again… You have stopped breathing.
‘Park Jungsoo’
end of flash back.
You look at the grave in front of you. The name is running through your head. You’ve bought some flowers that you lay on the grave. The tears are pouring down. You sit down in front of the grave, you start to laugh.
“You know what hyung?” you laugh
“Yesterday I was with Sungmin… Do you remember him?”
You looks at the grave. The rain start to pour down. You just sit there.
“Hyung… I really miss you…” your tears mixes with the rain
“Hyung… Please come back… I can’t live without you… I’m all messed up..."