PRIVATE ENTRY; WARDED AGAINST ALL
Hello again, Sir Journal. I have a bit to get off of my chest. I would rather just vent it here than talk to Ginny or Harry or anyone else, because I really don't want to look anymore like some obsessive girl just looking for a reason to talk about Fred Weasley than I already do.
As I said before, we sort of talked today. More than we ever did before. And I've seen Freddie flirt with girls before, so I knew that's what he was doing. He'd never flirted with me before, or even really spared a second glance, so I was pretty excited about it, you know? Yeah, I know that he was bored out of his mind and probably just saw me as someone to talk to, and I'm a girl, so why not flirt? But still.
I feel sort of pathetic. How can I be so fascinated with the same boy for six years? A boy that never really paid any attention to me? Wouldn't I get bored or something? Is there still a chance I will? I'm beginning to doubt it.
I've been to his house before, I've eaten meals at his table, I've hung out with his family. His little sister is my best friend. So why would he really look at me, you know? I don't blame him, I guess.
It's not like I'm bitter at all or anything. I'm just confused, really. I want to know why I can't forget about him and go crazy over someone else.
He called me his favorite fangirl. And honestly, I'm happy to be his anything. Even if that's all there is. I can't be like this forever.
...Right?