An exercise in futility.
supercore23: I just feel bad for you. That you think everyone's out to get you. It may feel that way to you Heather, But it's not the truth. I hope you realize that someday.
hethecakes: i will never be good enough for any of you. i will always be flawed.
hethecakes: i'm going to go lie down now. this has taken a lot out of me.
supercore23: We love you Heather. We all do.
hethecakes: good night.
hethecakes signed off at 9:52:31 PM.
If you're still reading this journal thing I've been keeping for you, We do love you. Me, your mom, scott, phil, justin, your grandparents, everyone around you.
I can't speak for anyone else, but I know I never asked you to be perfect. I just wanted you to be Heather. The real Heather. The one that shone through the makeup and the clothes and the hair and whatever else you chose to try to hide yourself. To me, It didn't matter. You shone through like sun through heavy clouds. That brightness, accentuated by the darkness surrounding it, giving life and warmth and hope that one day the clouds would part and we would bask in a clean spring morning, fresh and vibrant.
Somehow, the clouds have closed in. A cacophony of thunder, bright flashes, and electricty in the air. One word enough to break open the skies and drown us all. But no storm lasts forever. Even the worst ones. Remember that.
The sun comes up and goes down, night follows day, but the sun never moves. We simply spin and spin, around and around, and wish it could be day just that little bit longer, so we could feel warmth, and light, and breathe in life from above.
"In good times, and bad."
Yes, These are the bad times. For you right now, Very bad times. I know you've lost hope in me, and in us, and others. But don't those faith in yourself. That light still shines in you. A light that bright can never be extinguished. That light can never die.
Your light lives in me and all those you've ever touched. You have given me reason to go on living at times when I thought it would just be easier to give it all up. But I remember the way you made me feel and the glow that surrounded you always. And I knew that as long as there was something as beautiful as you in this world, even if I couldn't have you, that meant that the world was a place worth living in.
This is the letter I always should have written you. I'm sorry that it comes so late. I hope you find what you are looking for someday. I didn't have the strength to fight for it. I hope you do.
hethecakes: i will never be good enough for any of you. i will always be flawed.
hethecakes: i'm going to go lie down now. this has taken a lot out of me.
supercore23: We love you Heather. We all do.
hethecakes: good night.
hethecakes signed off at 9:52:31 PM.
If you're still reading this journal thing I've been keeping for you, We do love you. Me, your mom, scott, phil, justin, your grandparents, everyone around you.
I can't speak for anyone else, but I know I never asked you to be perfect. I just wanted you to be Heather. The real Heather. The one that shone through the makeup and the clothes and the hair and whatever else you chose to try to hide yourself. To me, It didn't matter. You shone through like sun through heavy clouds. That brightness, accentuated by the darkness surrounding it, giving life and warmth and hope that one day the clouds would part and we would bask in a clean spring morning, fresh and vibrant.
Somehow, the clouds have closed in. A cacophony of thunder, bright flashes, and electricty in the air. One word enough to break open the skies and drown us all. But no storm lasts forever. Even the worst ones. Remember that.
The sun comes up and goes down, night follows day, but the sun never moves. We simply spin and spin, around and around, and wish it could be day just that little bit longer, so we could feel warmth, and light, and breathe in life from above.
"In good times, and bad."
Yes, These are the bad times. For you right now, Very bad times. I know you've lost hope in me, and in us, and others. But don't those faith in yourself. That light still shines in you. A light that bright can never be extinguished. That light can never die.
Your light lives in me and all those you've ever touched. You have given me reason to go on living at times when I thought it would just be easier to give it all up. But I remember the way you made me feel and the glow that surrounded you always. And I knew that as long as there was something as beautiful as you in this world, even if I couldn't have you, that meant that the world was a place worth living in.
This is the letter I always should have written you. I'm sorry that it comes so late. I hope you find what you are looking for someday. I didn't have the strength to fight for it. I hope you do.