(no subject)
This is it. This is the end. The end of my epic adventure, of my striking out into the great big world to make my own way. The end of my declaration of independence, of my breaking the boundaries of the northern hemisphere. Two months ago, I was sitting in Buffalo Airport, scared out of my mind. Two months ago, I was a naive little girl who had never traveled outside her own country (I dont count Canada as going to another country) Two months ago....was a long time ago. Yet it feels like it slipped right by, with all the fluidity and speed of a blink of an eye. Tomorrow I return to my family, to my friends, to my home. To the niche that I have carved for myself in these past 21 years, yet a niche that will not fit so comfortably as it did two months ago. Tomorrow I fly back to the rush, the pressure, the fighting, back to marriages and new beginnings, back to familiar places and comfortable accents.
Part of me looks forward to this. I have missed my family, my friends, and I'm excited to catch up on all that I've missed in the last two months. Another part of me dreads this. What if I become incredibly discontented with being at home, being back at Houghton? I have no job at school now....I'm not driving back and forth every weekend to work at Walgreen's. i've got my apartment the way I wanted, but entertaining costs money, and I like being able to just bake and whatnot without worrying about money. I suppose this is a why of God shutting one door and opening a hopefully better one, but sometimes i have trouble with the whole trust thing.
So many thoughts....they're starting to jumble together and just create general fuzz in my head. I didn't get much accomplished today, other than watching Chase for Dianne during music this morning. Other than that, just puttered around, pretending to pack, went for coffee at this great little French cafe, then came home and hung out with my family for the night.
This is the end of this adventure, but hopefully the beginning to a new one. The next one may not be as glamorous, or as impressive, but it will be one nonetheless.
THE END
Part of me looks forward to this. I have missed my family, my friends, and I'm excited to catch up on all that I've missed in the last two months. Another part of me dreads this. What if I become incredibly discontented with being at home, being back at Houghton? I have no job at school now....I'm not driving back and forth every weekend to work at Walgreen's. i've got my apartment the way I wanted, but entertaining costs money, and I like being able to just bake and whatnot without worrying about money. I suppose this is a why of God shutting one door and opening a hopefully better one, but sometimes i have trouble with the whole trust thing.
So many thoughts....they're starting to jumble together and just create general fuzz in my head. I didn't get much accomplished today, other than watching Chase for Dianne during music this morning. Other than that, just puttered around, pretending to pack, went for coffee at this great little French cafe, then came home and hung out with my family for the night.
This is the end of this adventure, but hopefully the beginning to a new one. The next one may not be as glamorous, or as impressive, but it will be one nonetheless.
THE END