BAH!
When I was a little less than five years old I was in the car with my parents and there was a homeless family on the side of the road. There was a little boy there and I asked my mom what they were doing and she explained to me that they were poor and didn't have food so they needed money. I got terribly upset and demanded answers. I waasn't able to grasp the concept of why that boy didn't have toys and things that I did. I was too young to understand, but was aware of something not being right with it.
I have never heard that story before today.
Feelings I like:
I like feeling in charge.
I like feeling like no one in the room can surprise me, or at least not in a negative way.
I like shocking people, its amusing to me.
I like feeling like I accomplished something for me.
I like when I am able to make people happy...it makes me feel useful and wanted.
Alone.
Feelings I don't like:
When I feel like things are just plain out of my hands.
When I hurt someone I care about, I guess its disappointment.
When Leslie says dumb stuff that really hurts, and doesn't think twice about it cuz she doesn't care.
^Like she just did.
When I feel old.
When I'm tired, not physically, just mentally, emotionally, when all my energy for the day had gone to putting on a face or being something for someone, whether it be a socialite or a shoulder to cry on.
Allowing myself to go numb.
Jealousy
Alone.
I will have to think more on the list later.
Some guy is hitting on me right now. Bah.
Here's a pretty cycle: Insecurity=bitterness=conflicted feelings=insecurity...and round we go.
Self destruction is highly disguisable.
Controller...Passive, manipulative
Controller...Agressive, mom.
Oh I listened to Keith Urban for the first time today...In a while that is. It makes me happy I can do that now...
I have never heard that story before today.
Feelings I like:
I like feeling in charge.
I like feeling like no one in the room can surprise me, or at least not in a negative way.
I like shocking people, its amusing to me.
I like feeling like I accomplished something for me.
I like when I am able to make people happy...it makes me feel useful and wanted.
Alone.
Feelings I don't like:
When I feel like things are just plain out of my hands.
When I hurt someone I care about, I guess its disappointment.
When Leslie says dumb stuff that really hurts, and doesn't think twice about it cuz she doesn't care.
^Like she just did.
When I feel old.
When I'm tired, not physically, just mentally, emotionally, when all my energy for the day had gone to putting on a face or being something for someone, whether it be a socialite or a shoulder to cry on.
Allowing myself to go numb.
Jealousy
Alone.
I will have to think more on the list later.
Some guy is hitting on me right now. Bah.
Here's a pretty cycle: Insecurity=bitterness=conflicted feelings=insecurity...and round we go.
Self destruction is highly disguisable.
Controller...Passive, manipulative
Controller...Agressive, mom.
Oh I listened to Keith Urban for the first time today...In a while that is. It makes me happy I can do that now...