I don't miss you but I miss who you used to be
So..
I don't care if anyone hates me, I know alot of people do and that's cool. But if you hate me, have an effing reason and remain consistent. "Liz I'm sorry"... 5 minutes later... "You are a cunt". Yeah, that is cool. Grow up.
It's too bad I didn't get arrested because then I would still be friends with the biggest lamehead I know. Sorry you took the blame on your own. Hopefully soon you'll realize that it is you you are mad at, not me. I didn't do an effing thing.
Take it out on me, do it. Because every insult I have heard from you I don't forget. Even if you wanted to be friends now I wouldn't. You're an immature spoiled brat and you're really not worth it.
So I've been thinking alot lately.
I know what I want.
I'm incapable of achieving it though.
It's funny that my wish on 11:11 has been the same since my senior year in high school.
It'll prolly always be the same thing.
Because I'll never be -----.
I'll never have ------.
I'll always be not quite good enough for whatever part I'm trying to fulfill.
But if I did get my wish, I prolly won't be any happier. Obviously for a little I will be but I'll have to come to the realization that life is not a fairy tale, nothing will ever be perfect, there is no such thing as love, and people change and die.
What I want now may be the same exact wish as 2 years ago, but I've changed since then and so has everyone else. I have a feeling that I've convinced myself otherwise and if things actually happened as I wish, the outcome just wouldn't quite be the same as it would have been 2 years ago, see?
This is how it's sposed to happen for the most part: I care about someone and that person cares about me. Period. It's not difficult, but it's obviously too much to ask.
I think if I had one consistent person who cared about me always through eveerything and I had always been there for that person too, I'd be a much better person and I'd have a reason to smile.
I'm losing alot of weight. Nothing ever looks appetizing anymore. My boobs are getting smaller. You can see my ribs, it's gross. I'm going to go eat.
I don't care if anyone hates me, I know alot of people do and that's cool. But if you hate me, have an effing reason and remain consistent. "Liz I'm sorry"... 5 minutes later... "You are a cunt". Yeah, that is cool. Grow up.
It's too bad I didn't get arrested because then I would still be friends with the biggest lamehead I know. Sorry you took the blame on your own. Hopefully soon you'll realize that it is you you are mad at, not me. I didn't do an effing thing.
Take it out on me, do it. Because every insult I have heard from you I don't forget. Even if you wanted to be friends now I wouldn't. You're an immature spoiled brat and you're really not worth it.
So I've been thinking alot lately.
I know what I want.
I'm incapable of achieving it though.
It's funny that my wish on 11:11 has been the same since my senior year in high school.
It'll prolly always be the same thing.
Because I'll never be -----.
I'll never have ------.
I'll always be not quite good enough for whatever part I'm trying to fulfill.
But if I did get my wish, I prolly won't be any happier. Obviously for a little I will be but I'll have to come to the realization that life is not a fairy tale, nothing will ever be perfect, there is no such thing as love, and people change and die.
What I want now may be the same exact wish as 2 years ago, but I've changed since then and so has everyone else. I have a feeling that I've convinced myself otherwise and if things actually happened as I wish, the outcome just wouldn't quite be the same as it would have been 2 years ago, see?
This is how it's sposed to happen for the most part: I care about someone and that person cares about me. Period. It's not difficult, but it's obviously too much to ask.
I think if I had one consistent person who cared about me always through eveerything and I had always been there for that person too, I'd be a much better person and I'd have a reason to smile.
I'm losing alot of weight. Nothing ever looks appetizing anymore. My boobs are getting smaller. You can see my ribs, it's gross. I'm going to go eat.