Home for the Weekend.
Dear Livejournal,
I am going to use you this weekend to post things about me, as of late, to help in my emotional growth and development.
Today =
Bad Morning.
Asked to leave work.
Lazy afternoon.
Uplifting convo with Beckers.
Sitting here. Hi, How are you?
Basically, Jimmy and I got in a big ole...fight? and then he went home for the weekend. I'm exhausted with the particulars. I'm sick of the same conversation. I don't want to be a hassle. I don't want to serve a purpose.
My mom and I talked today when she got home (early) from work. She didn't make me mad or say anything I though completely ignorant and unreasonable. (completely) Alas, we aren't ever going to have that mother/homosexual son relationship. I'm not crying. I told her about plans to live with Jimmy during the year. She was supportive. She was supportive about college. That's all I needed from her. I want her to believe I can take care of myself and be safe and make good decisions, or least not... I don't know. That's so idealistic. Fail.
Lakeside Concert tonight. Fail, too. Tylenol PM afterwards...PASS.
I'm proud of myself for working two jobs. I'm proud of myself for taking care of myself for the most part. I'm proud of myself for practicing on a regular basis and I'm also glad that I have been excited about the french horn.
Becky suggested I keep a journal. Not in this format of course, but a real journal.
Fundamentally, I think a little faith is what is needed now. I want him to initiate moving forward. He wants me to initiate the further development. Neither wants to do it alone. Understandable. Petty-ness won out today in the discussion field. A fruitful tomorrow is anticipated.
Lo, how a rose (love) 'ere blooming. -> This is today's conclusion.
I am going to use you this weekend to post things about me, as of late, to help in my emotional growth and development.
Today =
Bad Morning.
Asked to leave work.
Lazy afternoon.
Uplifting convo with Beckers.
Sitting here. Hi, How are you?
Basically, Jimmy and I got in a big ole...fight? and then he went home for the weekend. I'm exhausted with the particulars. I'm sick of the same conversation. I don't want to be a hassle. I don't want to serve a purpose.
My mom and I talked today when she got home (early) from work. She didn't make me mad or say anything I though completely ignorant and unreasonable. (completely) Alas, we aren't ever going to have that mother/homosexual son relationship. I'm not crying. I told her about plans to live with Jimmy during the year. She was supportive. She was supportive about college. That's all I needed from her. I want her to believe I can take care of myself and be safe and make good decisions, or least not... I don't know. That's so idealistic. Fail.
Lakeside Concert tonight. Fail, too. Tylenol PM afterwards...PASS.
I'm proud of myself for working two jobs. I'm proud of myself for taking care of myself for the most part. I'm proud of myself for practicing on a regular basis and I'm also glad that I have been excited about the french horn.
Becky suggested I keep a journal. Not in this format of course, but a real journal.
Fundamentally, I think a little faith is what is needed now. I want him to initiate moving forward. He wants me to initiate the further development. Neither wants to do it alone. Understandable. Petty-ness won out today in the discussion field. A fruitful tomorrow is anticipated.
Lo, how a rose (love) 'ere blooming. -> This is today's conclusion.