havent updated in forever
so i have such a stressful life & its so hard & aggravating i figured id start writing in here again to vent & hopefully get rid of some of the stress.
im not even sure where to begin, it seems like everything is going wrong pretty much.
I have a crappy car that i feel like i got tricked into buying & now i cant get another one because of a car accident from forever ago that wasnt even my fault or my car involved.
plus we live in a stupid apartment with jackass neighbors on both sides & its stressful, scary, & annoying to have to constantly deal with them
but we cant move because even though we were supposed to save up a bunch of money to do so, like half of it got spent on Seans piece of shit car that isnt even worth it plus it takes away the little bit of time we have to spend together not that he ever wants to spend it anywhere near me anyways.
I feel like im getting used & totally unloved by Sean and sometimes i dont even know why im still around & keep putting up with it cuz im constantly telling him how i feel & instead of being like normal people & try to change it & prove it he gets mad & then stays away longer.
sometimes i just feel like packing up his shit & putting it outside so he cna get it & get the hell outta my life... idk i cant explain it. he has no clue how bad it hurts to sit around everyday with a hectic life that HE chose & created & then feel like u dont mean shit to them anyways. its the most painful heartbreaking thing in the world & i go through it everyday.
just like this week, today is the only day ill get to spend with him was tonight after work & he couldnt even come home & spend 10 minutes with me he dropped the baby back off with me then was like okay bye im gonig to work on my engine.
i cant even put into words how completely miserable & horrible hes made me feel the past year or so.
how hard is it to show someone u love them & to try to spend time with them?? we used to be together every chance we got, now i ant even beg him to spend time with me because he still wont care enough to do it.
i mean i fuckin love the kid to death more than he'll ever know & to feel like hes just using that & doesnt give a fuck about me is so painful.
well i gotta go i got a kid to take care of since one of us has to do it & it definitely wont be him...
ehh....
im not even sure where to begin, it seems like everything is going wrong pretty much.
I have a crappy car that i feel like i got tricked into buying & now i cant get another one because of a car accident from forever ago that wasnt even my fault or my car involved.
plus we live in a stupid apartment with jackass neighbors on both sides & its stressful, scary, & annoying to have to constantly deal with them
but we cant move because even though we were supposed to save up a bunch of money to do so, like half of it got spent on Seans piece of shit car that isnt even worth it plus it takes away the little bit of time we have to spend together not that he ever wants to spend it anywhere near me anyways.
I feel like im getting used & totally unloved by Sean and sometimes i dont even know why im still around & keep putting up with it cuz im constantly telling him how i feel & instead of being like normal people & try to change it & prove it he gets mad & then stays away longer.
sometimes i just feel like packing up his shit & putting it outside so he cna get it & get the hell outta my life... idk i cant explain it. he has no clue how bad it hurts to sit around everyday with a hectic life that HE chose & created & then feel like u dont mean shit to them anyways. its the most painful heartbreaking thing in the world & i go through it everyday.
just like this week, today is the only day ill get to spend with him was tonight after work & he couldnt even come home & spend 10 minutes with me he dropped the baby back off with me then was like okay bye im gonig to work on my engine.
i cant even put into words how completely miserable & horrible hes made me feel the past year or so.
how hard is it to show someone u love them & to try to spend time with them?? we used to be together every chance we got, now i ant even beg him to spend time with me because he still wont care enough to do it.
i mean i fuckin love the kid to death more than he'll ever know & to feel like hes just using that & doesnt give a fuck about me is so painful.
well i gotta go i got a kid to take care of since one of us has to do it & it definitely wont be him...
ehh....