Jun 19, 2006 11:16
Did anyone else while away their stuvac instead of re-reading your readers and generally studying (as the stu* in stuvac stands for study)?
On the 30th, one shall be heading northwards with friend and car. Thank God for a much needed holiday. God is in capital letters because I was watching Bruce almighty, and if God IS, I repeat, IS Morgan Freeman I’d watch out. You know what they say about Morgan Freeman.
Staying up to watch the game last night, not regretful of staying up as I would have been if it was any other normal school day where I have to wake up at 8am to go to school. No, today I got up at 9. WooHoo.
I know I’m in very bad physical condition at the moment considering I refuse to do any exercise. No really, I went bowling the day before, and my wrists and lower back and knees and fingers and feet still hurt from picking up that damn ball. And all I got from two games was one strike and ten spares. Oh yeah, and I can not play any sports that requires me to run or kick above hip height. Whinge Whinge Whinge.
So I purchases a cable, the same day as my stint in bowling, which I really think I could go professional in, from Dick Smith Electronics ( www.dse.com.au ) and it cost me 14 bucks. As I hand over my cash I just wanted to say, “Fucking Fuckers, Fucking rip my fucking 14 bucks out of my fucking hands, just for a fucking cable, for fuck’s sake!)
But I didn’t, I just sort of grunted and made my way out of the store without breaking anyone, I mean thing. But in retrospect, this cable has been a great investment. It allows me to connect laptop to stereo and play music loudly. And I’ll admit, Gwen Stefani’s song, “Cool” has been there a couple of times. That CD I burnt from Thania, the friend we were playing bowling with.
I just banged my fucking knee on the fucking desk and realised an injury from that bowling I had not realised I had yet. So anyway, this bowling thing was actually Thania’s sister’s birthyday thingo, which I sort of crashed. And one of Thania’s sister’s friend looks like Lindsay Lohan… And throughout the evening we called her Lindsay Lohan. But she was fatter than Lindsay Lohan.
So I get in the car knowing full well I had left my usb in the house. But that really has nothing to do with nothing, But that Japan v Australia game ir probably the only other soccer match I’ve watched in my life. I’ve noticed I’ve become more patriotic in the past few days. I’ve started saying things like “Sophie Delizio’s a little TROOPER” or “Mate”. Well I haven’t said mate, but the words mateship and SIMPSON’S DONKEYS pop up in my head quite a fair bit. MAYBE I’M JUST TAKING THE PISS. Wait a second …. Isn’t “taking the piss” an Australian colloquialism? I think I’m going to eat my citizenship paper and spew it up, like Lindsay Lohan.
But Lohan’s an Irish name isn’t it? Well if I ever work at a pub or drive through liquor place in Ireland, I’m going to change my damn name to Sunny Lohan just to fit in with the theme. I’ll be able to say: You can’t swing a cat in here. (in reference to the size of a room) or She’s got a burst mattress. (Referring to a man or woman’s hairy bikini line, that is visible around the sides of their swimmers).
That brings me to a little story about the MS HANNIFORD’S PERMED AND STRAIGHTENED PUBIC HAIR. These stories always start at swimming carnivals in year nine don’t they. Basically my friend Priya saw Ms Hanniford’s burst mattress. Hanniford was a bitch, Oh I think she was just sitting around in her bathing costume and had idly spread-eagled her limbs whilst sitting down, etching her pubic hair on Priya’s cornea.
The End