What about me?
Its so funny... I have ended quite a few poisonous relationships over the past two years of my life, and every single one of those people have insisted that I think everything is all about me. Initially, the intent of those words worked like a charm. I was very hurt. I would obsess over how utterly incorrect that statement was and baffled beyond reason at how anyone could make such a claim and genuinely mean it. The very idea that someone might truly believe such a thing would literally keep me awake at night, heart pounding, mind racing. Things that make no sense to me often create that result. And after all, I know few people who are more vocally appreciative of and loving toward their friends as I am. So it is with sincere relief that I finally realized that the subtext was really what that verbal fastball was all about. It was really their way of telling me how angry they were that it wasn't all about them.
I'm not about to start playing handball in my house of glass over here. Nosiree! I can recount many times when I have lobbed something hateful and hurtful at someone when they wanted no part of me any longer. Rejection can bring out the nastiest results in people and I am no exception. Of course, I haven't done something like that since I was in my twenties, but I am certain that I find my ways of retaliating, even when I plan to retain the status of being the bigger person (figuratively speaking of course). We are taught, throughout life, to react that way. Its not only natural, its widely accepted and expected. But it is a practice that I will never again employ.
I'm not about to start playing handball in my house of glass over here. Nosiree! I can recount many times when I have lobbed something hateful and hurtful at someone when they wanted no part of me any longer. Rejection can bring out the nastiest results in people and I am no exception. Of course, I haven't done something like that since I was in my twenties, but I am certain that I find my ways of retaliating, even when I plan to retain the status of being the bigger person (figuratively speaking of course). We are taught, throughout life, to react that way. Its not only natural, its widely accepted and expected. But it is a practice that I will never again employ.