(no subject)
well. it's 2006, i'm back in eugene, already overwhelmed with homework on the first day of winter term. life has gone back to normal, i guess.
so to recap my christmas break: the first almost two weeks that i was home were very emotional. on the one hand, i was at home with my family and my friends and it was so awesome to hang out and be chill for just a little while, pretend that nobody had to go back to school or anything. it was really neat going to see the sprague concerts, and reconnecting with that little family i have in salem. but on the other hand, my grandmother passed away, and the grief from my grandpa's death came back to me, so i was bummed out. not to mention i learned every little thing wrong with me in about a week. but i got to escape, and i went to cabo with the family, and had an incredible time. it was perfect weather: sunny and hot, and the water was just beautiful. the lifestyle there is just so different from our's, and it was exciting to be in such a tropical place that just pulsed with excitement and vitality. and timeshare people. that got incredibly annoying. but it was by far the best family trip i've ever had, and probably the most exciting place i've ever been to. dad's "cabo!!" was repeated many times, with margaritas in hand, of course. it was incredibly awesome. the day after we returned to salem was awesome, i got to hang out with my three bffs, and we played pictionary and laughed a good deal. that was the best laughing i've ever done in my life. there was a little bump in the road after leaving kim's, but it all got worked out. so on monday, january 2, we flew to detroit, and arrived to the house at 6 in the morning january 3. let me tell you, that was such a bad flight day. we sat on the plane for two and a half hours in minneapolis waiting for them to get the weight of the luggage just right so we could fly and not crash. word of advice: never ever ever fly northwest. they have cheap tickets, but there are reasons why it's inexpensive. after sleeping for a while, we met with my aunt and uncle for a while, later that night dad and jeanne got in a huge gigantic screaming match that resulted in a tearful mom leading adam and me out on a walk, while bert (who was incrediby drunk) sat in the kitchen, downing more whiskey. we came back and i went into my room and burst into tears. but the next day, things were better, and that night, went to jack's with justin, pascha, gina, jayson, and jeanne and bert. it was of course a good time, the boys are just awesome. however, later we learned that jim (my dad's brother) decided not to come to the funeral, which put the more inebriated people over the edge, and now jeanne has decided to not let jim or his wife kathy receive anything of grandma's. friday, we went to greek town and had saganaki "opa!!" cheese, and i thought of kim the whole time we were there. then were locked out of the house, when we got in jeanne got more mad at dad and mom, and bert accused mom of stealing one of grandma's credit cards they had shipped back from califonia. bert had just placed the fedex envelope it came in on the table in a bunch of newspapers, and when he lost the envelope, he accused mom, in front of everybody, of stealing it. that was bad. but jeff (another cousin) and his wife lisa came, and my family of 4 and the 3 couples plus my cousin shara went to dinner at a little italian restaurant. the funeral was on saturday, it was a beautiful service and the wake was very nice, unfortunately i had a harder time dealing with the whole thing than i anticipated. but it's alright, everybody went out to dinner that night and said our goodbyes. then we got up at 5, eastern time, flew out at 9:15, had a horrible flight day (everything was so stressful, they'd change our gate without telling us, or board early and we'd be late, it was just awful) and arrived in salem at 5, spent 15 minutes packing everything for school in the car, and made it to eugene by 6:45. unpacked, spent some time with kim, nicole, and a couple dudes from upstairs, and then fell asleep at 11. the last day of christmas break.
i'm certainly reeling from it all. i have a hard time thinking about this past week, grandma's death hasn't sunk in, and all of the fights just wore me out. luckily, i think that we'll be in touch with most of my cousins, who are all i care about anyway. but it was just frustrating to have some members of the family be so psycho. and it's depressing, knowing that my grandparent's house, built by them in 1944, where they raised all three kids and then some of the grandkids, is just going to be sold. i spent some time in my dad's old room, not thinking anything in particular, just hoping that i wouldn't ever forget that moment. my childhood, as well as my father's, is gone as well. no more grandparents, no more holidays with family, no more detroit...everything's gone. so yes, i'm emotional, and stressed, and probably not thinking a whole lot right now. i suppose those who know me should expect that. and i'm still so shocked that i came back to have the one thing that i relied on completely fall apart.
i think i'm going to home this weekend, i left so much stuff at home, either i go get it, or mom brings it to me, and it'd be much more fun to go get it. although this has been a long update, i need to finish it with a really awesome song that pretty much sums everything up.
I never knew
I never knew that everything was falling through
That everyone I knew was waiting on a cue
To turn and run when all I needed was the truth
But that's how it's got to be
It's coming down to nothing more than apathy
I'd rather run the other way than stay and see
The smoke and who's still standing when it clears
Everyone knows I'm in
Over my head
With eight seconds left in overtime
She's on your mind
Let's rearrange
I wish you were a stranger I could disengage
Say that we agree and then never change
Soften a bit until we all just get along
But that's disregard
Find another friend and you discard
As you lose the argument in a cable car
Hanging above as the canyon comes between
Everyone knows I'm in
Over my head
With eight seconds left in overtime
She's on your mind
And suddenly I become a part of your past
I'm becoming the part that don't last
I'm losing you and its effortless
Without a sound we lose sight of the ground
In the throw around
Never thought that you wanted to bring it down
I won't let it go down till we torch it ourselves
Everyone knows I'm in
Over my head
With eight seconds left in overtime
She's on your mind