HAPPY MOTHERFUCKING BIRTHDAY TO THE SELF-RIGHTEOUS 'ARTIST'
Holy fucking crap.
...holy mother..fucking shit. fucking shit
its amazing how you can go from sky high and then crash down in a few minutes.
..I need someone to talk to about feeling left behing and feeling like I've made a huge mistake but everyone's off celebrating the fact that they got into motherfucking Yale or Swarthmore or Barnard or whatever the fuck.
....oh my god.. what am I going to do..
Im going to be completely left behind.
I think I can do art for my life? I think I can just breathe, sweat, crap, bleed art for my whole life and live off of that? Be satisfied with that?
pretend I dont have a side of me that enjoys being with people that are concerned about fucking.. green awareness and international conflicts and .. oh my god. I am so fucked. up.
without having a side that is interested in research and all the shit that comes along with going to a real college?
and why the fuck the fuck.. do I feel so dirty about a 3 year old fucking mistake? how can a few snickering words on a glaring screen just make me want to convulse for the rest of my life?
And no one answers their phone.
Holy fucking shit. ..
I will be completely hallow for my birthday.
Im a fucked up whore and I want to vomit it all out until I just fall asleep for a few days and wake up in some desolate place.
...holy mother..fucking shit. fucking shit
its amazing how you can go from sky high and then crash down in a few minutes.
..I need someone to talk to about feeling left behing and feeling like I've made a huge mistake but everyone's off celebrating the fact that they got into motherfucking Yale or Swarthmore or Barnard or whatever the fuck.
....oh my god.. what am I going to do..
Im going to be completely left behind.
I think I can do art for my life? I think I can just breathe, sweat, crap, bleed art for my whole life and live off of that? Be satisfied with that?
pretend I dont have a side of me that enjoys being with people that are concerned about fucking.. green awareness and international conflicts and .. oh my god. I am so fucked. up.
without having a side that is interested in research and all the shit that comes along with going to a real college?
and why the fuck the fuck.. do I feel so dirty about a 3 year old fucking mistake? how can a few snickering words on a glaring screen just make me want to convulse for the rest of my life?
And no one answers their phone.
Holy fucking shit. ..
I will be completely hallow for my birthday.
Im a fucked up whore and I want to vomit it all out until I just fall asleep for a few days and wake up in some desolate place.