and so it seems that it'll go like this

[sunlight_rocket]

i can't not talk about it.  talking about it makes it seem more real for me, and if i can talk and plan, well then i can honestly look forward to it.

am i still skeptical?  you bet.  but i'm very much a "i'll believe it when i see it" sort of girl, so there it is.

either way, i feel better about it and generally in higher spirits.

true, i've been in a slump lately, due largely to my dreading this upcoming semester, and largely to a painful longing to get to Eugene.  Jake's been way too patient with me, and i feel awful for putting him through all that.

i really don't deserve him.  he's been so wonderful in my life, and i will never know how or why he puts up with me, but he does.

as for me, i'd be completely lost without him.  i can't imagine what my life was like before Jake, but if i had to describe it i could only say it was like a shell--outwardly something but nothing inside, no substance.

so that's that.  semester, OK.  it's going to suck hard, i know that.  i can only hope that it'll be over with before i know it.

Euegene, yes it does exist.  and yes, we will get there.

Jake, nothing short of being my best friend and guiding light.

:)  very nice.

~Shaina