Searching for a best friend,
Requirements:
Someone who's smart, but not intimidating.
Funny and thinks my weird since of humor is hilarious.
Doesn't mind listening to me babble.
Always makes me happy.
Who wont talk about me behind my back.
Someone who will consider me there best friend and wont always be busy with five million other people.
Who wont exclude me from group activities.
Wont see me as two-faced.
Will understand my mood swings and just be there to help me through it.
Someone who's house I can run to when my parents are being stupid.
I want someone who will know me better than I know myself, and tell me when I'm being stupid but in the most loving way possible.
Someone who wants to be around me.
Please be female, I'm done with guys.
It seems like all the best friend jobs are taken around here.
I guess I missed when the applications were sent out.
Must've happened when I was moving around.
The person I try to say is my best friend really isn't, she's just a nice person to talk to.
Her and her lovely other friends are always together and are always having fun.
The "Wonder Crew" or whatever. In every one of their myspaces' they have a photo folder including their friends and what not.. and I consider them the "best" friends that I have..and..I'm always left in the dark. Always.
And apparently I'm two-faced.
I don't know.
I probably am.
I don't care.
At least I wont have anyone crying about me leaving.
To top it all off I don't even enjoy being in my own home.
I want to get out, and find some place where I don't need someone else to make me happy.
I'm really hoping the end of July gets here fast, thoughts that scare me are coming back to my head.
Making me really think that I'm no way cut out for this world, if I can't even make it in high school with a bunch of kids, how am I supposed to get a job and go to college and have a life and a family and all that? I know I sound depressing, but I am a depressed person. It's like Alex said, "You're either really happy, or you're really sad."
I try to be soo happy, because no one likes sad people.
I know I'm a bitch sometimes..and I'm sorry in advance, I have really bad mood swings. I swear they just hit randomly where I'm just all of a sudden pissed off and don't want anyone to talk to me.
I've given myself a really big headache, all over something stupid. But its not stupid to me..but it sounds stupid..
I asked my dad if he'd take me to Adam's to see Kodie, which is my kind of sort of boyfriend..but he isn't really. And he said he'd think about it, which is a lot better than what he normally does, which is go off into a rant about how Kodie never tries to see me and how he's tired of having to be my Taxi and blah blah blah.. So I was really excited and thought I would get to go.
My dad comes back after picking my mom up and I ask him if he'll take me and he says no, which shouldn't have been a surprise..but whatever. I got pissed off and brought out the plain and simple fact that whenever it involves me going to see Kodie they never want to take me. Ever. My mom said it's because it's her car and she doesn't have to.
So now..I just need to work on getting a job and finding some where to go..because my internal clock is telling me its time to go. I'm not going to have anymore episodes with raised fists.
I'm off to read more about Wicca, I think I might have found a religion thats right for me.
Night.
P.s. I'm serious about the whole best friend thing.
Someone who's smart, but not intimidating.
Funny and thinks my weird since of humor is hilarious.
Doesn't mind listening to me babble.
Always makes me happy.
Who wont talk about me behind my back.
Someone who will consider me there best friend and wont always be busy with five million other people.
Who wont exclude me from group activities.
Wont see me as two-faced.
Will understand my mood swings and just be there to help me through it.
Someone who's house I can run to when my parents are being stupid.
I want someone who will know me better than I know myself, and tell me when I'm being stupid but in the most loving way possible.
Someone who wants to be around me.
Please be female, I'm done with guys.
It seems like all the best friend jobs are taken around here.
I guess I missed when the applications were sent out.
Must've happened when I was moving around.
The person I try to say is my best friend really isn't, she's just a nice person to talk to.
Her and her lovely other friends are always together and are always having fun.
The "Wonder Crew" or whatever. In every one of their myspaces' they have a photo folder including their friends and what not.. and I consider them the "best" friends that I have..and..I'm always left in the dark. Always.
And apparently I'm two-faced.
I don't know.
I probably am.
I don't care.
At least I wont have anyone crying about me leaving.
To top it all off I don't even enjoy being in my own home.
I want to get out, and find some place where I don't need someone else to make me happy.
I'm really hoping the end of July gets here fast, thoughts that scare me are coming back to my head.
Making me really think that I'm no way cut out for this world, if I can't even make it in high school with a bunch of kids, how am I supposed to get a job and go to college and have a life and a family and all that? I know I sound depressing, but I am a depressed person. It's like Alex said, "You're either really happy, or you're really sad."
I try to be soo happy, because no one likes sad people.
I know I'm a bitch sometimes..and I'm sorry in advance, I have really bad mood swings. I swear they just hit randomly where I'm just all of a sudden pissed off and don't want anyone to talk to me.
I've given myself a really big headache, all over something stupid. But its not stupid to me..but it sounds stupid..
I asked my dad if he'd take me to Adam's to see Kodie, which is my kind of sort of boyfriend..but he isn't really. And he said he'd think about it, which is a lot better than what he normally does, which is go off into a rant about how Kodie never tries to see me and how he's tired of having to be my Taxi and blah blah blah.. So I was really excited and thought I would get to go.
My dad comes back after picking my mom up and I ask him if he'll take me and he says no, which shouldn't have been a surprise..but whatever. I got pissed off and brought out the plain and simple fact that whenever it involves me going to see Kodie they never want to take me. Ever. My mom said it's because it's her car and she doesn't have to.
So now..I just need to work on getting a job and finding some where to go..because my internal clock is telling me its time to go. I'm not going to have anymore episodes with raised fists.
I'm off to read more about Wicca, I think I might have found a religion thats right for me.
Night.
P.s. I'm serious about the whole best friend thing.