love is the biggest liar

[sunkeneyed_girl]

i'm about to get on a train for 39 hours
39 hours with no one but myself
i'm not scared
i even want to go
but i wanted him to be there
i wanted that 'i'll be missing you' hug
and that kiss
that kiss that holds the wish that a week would pass like seconds
then to prepare for the cold return
with no blue eyes to devour me as i step back into those arms
no 'at last' hug
no 'don't ever go without me' kiss
must have been crazy to think it really belonged to me
that i would be allowed to experience stuff you only see in the movies
where love makes everything better