And this is why I need a baseball bat
I was awoken at 4:30am last night by what I was certain was a robber/rapist/serial killer.
I heard a big crash coming from somewhere inside my apartment and immediately panicked. I jumped out of bed and locked my bedroom door and then tried to be as quiet as possible while I tried to think if there was anything in my bedroom or ensuite bathroom that I could use for a weapon. I couldn't think of anything other than my 5 inch platform sandals, and so elected to stay put and silently panic until I could be assured that I wasn't hearing anything other than maybe my rabbit knocking the water bottle off the side of his cage.
After a few mintues of silence I got the nerve to look under my door to see if I could see anyone in the hallway. As you can see from this handy diagram, I was at the far end of my apartment, meaning that my potential killer/robber had many places to hide and jump out at me from if I were to go down the hall.
(Totally not proportional or anything.)
After about ten minutes of silence, I decided to make it clear to any potential attackers that they had better leave now because there was someone home and ready to call the police. So I said, rather shakily, "I've called the police!" (I hadn't, actually.) When I told my mom about this she asked "Were you expecting a reply?" Well, of course not. But if the robber thought they were breaking into an empty home, at least this way they knew that someone was here and that they would be better off shoving off for greener pastures. I got no reply nor heard anything. It had been nearly twenty minutes now and I was beginning to feel certain than there was not a serial killer in my apartment.
I dug out my flashlight as it is rather heavy and could be used to bludgeon someone if necessary and hesitantly opened my bedroom door. I had left two lamps in my living room on for Alonso (can bunnies see in the dark?) so I wasn't looking into complete darkness. I turned on the hall light and crept forward. As I passed my spare room where I keep all my art stuff I turned on it's light and immediatly found the source of the earlier disturbance.
(As you have probably guessed by now, it was not a serial killer.)
It was a set of plastic drawers in which I keep art supplies. I had left too many drawers open and the weight of the supplies in the open drawers had caused the whole thing to topple over; knocking over a lamp and causing the lamp that sat on top of it to fall off onto the floor. All the drawers had fallen out and there were oil pastels everywhere.
I am going to buy a new organizational system because I never want to feel that terrified ever again.
Even thought I had verified that I wasn't going to be robbed/raped/murdered/all of the above, I still went through my entire apartment, at 5 am, checking every possible place someone could be hiding. Alonso just sat there and looked at me like "What the heck are you doing, you crazy human?"
I knew from the postion in the far corner of the room that there was no way someone had knocked over the drawers in their haste to rob me; and let's face it: there's nothing worth stealing in that room anyway.
It took another half-hour before I had calmed down enough to sleep.
I'm going to buy a baseball bat. Or a taser. Or a prop gun. I'm too scared to buy a real one, but I can pull a 'Home Alone' if I have to. Or mace. Mace would be good to have anyway. Or I'll just keep a skillet under my bed. Yeah, that sounds good.
This should be subtitled "I shouldn't write posts at 2am but heck with it it's spring break and it's only 1:21 central time and I can sleep until 11 tomorrow and still have time to shower and feed Alonso before I go rampage around Chattown with my best friends." So I'm at home in Chattavegas at the moment and I brought Alonso with me because I'll be here for almost a week and I can't leave him alone that long and also the 80 degree weather is killing my apartment's AC. So now he's in my bedroom with me and just sort of sitting there staring at me.
I don't get it. I give him plenty of toys and chewies and things to entertain himself with and yet he spends so much time just sitting there. And rocking a little.
I don't understand this rabbit.