spanish culture quiz
so tonight i watched this movie called jamon jamon that i believe epitomizes life in spain. plot summary: penelope cruz is like 14, gets knocked up, and now her boyfriend wants to marry her. so they go and sit in a car in the desert and he starts sucking on her boobs saying how they taste like tortilla. wonderful. then his mother hates yje pregnant teen, because her mom's a whore and slept with her husband. so they own an underwear factory, like every spanish working class family, and the mom coerces a man who is auditioning to be the package that models the underwear on a billboard. so this guy, naturally, strips naked and starts to bullfight. then he sleeps with the underwear mom while the son who is engaged to penelope cruz starts sleeping with her mom. follow so far? so the naked underwear model shows up at penelope cruz's house with a cut on his foot and he asks her if she has any olive oil to clean the wound. just what any good spaniard would do. so she cleans his foot, then he smacks her ass and she falls in love with him. now, the fiancee is heartbroken upon discovering that penelope cruz has fallen for underwear model raul, despite the fact that he is sleeping with penelope's mom, so he vows to kill raul. penelope cruz, now madly in love with raul (because he smells like garlic, no lie) and seeks the help of her fiancee's dad to keep jose luis from killing raul but the dad starts to make out with her. we never find out what happens there. cut to jose luis discovering his naked mom mid-thrust on an engorged raul on the floor of a ham factory. jose luis, enraged, grabs a leg of ham and literally fights to the death with raul using only legs of ham. after jose luis is killed by raul's leg of ham and raul is hit by the car of jose luis's father, but not killed, penelope's mom shows up on a motorcycle. she runs to the dead jose luis and embraces him, but tells his dad to take good care of penelope. so the movie ends as penelope's mom is embracing her daughter's dead fiancee whose mom is embracing the wounded man who killed her son while her husband stands next to her holding his pregnant almost future daughter in law whom he caught nailing the man whose nailing his wife who also happens to be the underwear model for the billboards advertising his brand of underwear. brilliant spanish cinema.