Enchanted goes Jrock [ parody]
AUTHORS: huffy_chan&blindcottonlove
PAIRING/CHARACTERS: pretty much everybody :') The GazettE, Alice Nine, Kagrra,, Mana, Gackt...
RATING: PG for this chapter
GENRE: crack, AU, humor, romance
DISCLAIMER: The authors have no connections to the respective artists or movie makers; this story is completely fictional and no money is made out of it. Duh.
A/N: As the title says: this is a parody/humor/plain odd version of the movie Enchanted. The story's the same (or close enough), we just replaced Patrick Dempsey with... Ruki 8) Please, enjoy\,,/
SUMMARY: In a far-away forest there lives a young man called Uruha. His life is about to turn upside-down when he stumbles across a charming prince. Rarely, you see, a prince comes without a scheming step-motherfather in bargain...
Act. 1: In which Uruha is hangover-y and Hiroto likes climbing up to places
“Hnng…”
Uruha wrinkled his forehead. Someone else might've wrinkled his forehead in surprised confusion as hearing the odd noises but Uruha wrinkled his forehead in plain annoyance; unlike other people, Uruha knew where -or who- the noise originated from.
Rustle. Rustle.
Mice, who had recently started building a nest in the attic of his little house, weren't the reason behind the panting and rustling. Little birds playing in the trees nearby weren't responsible either for these uncomfortable sounds that had slowly deprived Uruha of his precious sleep.
Uruha tugged a blanket over his head.
Long, slender fingers grasped Uruha's bedroom's windowsill tightly. A brown, tousled mess of hair appeared behind the window. It was followed by big, keenly observing eyes, a snub nose and lastly, a widely smiling mouth. The creature peeking into the bedroom was, all in all, very adorable. Yet, however, the newcomer wasn't as adorable by his composure, as he quickly proved by losing balance and falling onto the floor with a loud and painful thump.
Uruha didn't see any of this, as he was still lurking under his sheets. He buried himself deeper under the blanket as he heard light steps approaching his bed.
“Hangover-y today, aren’t we?”
Uruha rolled onto his other side, answering the remark with icy ignorance.
"I came by yesterday. I would've wanted to play a little Scrabble with you. I had peanut butter ice cream and organically produced cider with me, even. But, you weren't at home. You ass."
“You are the one who is the ass here, Hiroto. You have to stop climbing up to my house when I’m not home. Actually, just stop doing it completely. “
“But I’m lonely…” Hiroto said and made himself comfortable at the bed foot, quickly forcing his way under the blanket.
“Whatever,” Uruha said with rolling eyes. “Shut up at least, I’m trying to sleep here.”
Hiroto nodded, watching his friend grunt and grumble as the blond man re-positioned himself comfortably.
“Did you have dreams last night?” Hiroto asked languidly, enticed by the warmth of the bed.
At first Uruha wasn't going to answer. He had never really understood why he was friends with Hiroto -the younger man was nosy, too curious for his own good and loved all the things Uruha passionately hated. Small talk just to produce sound to fulfill silence was one of these things.
“Maybe. I don’t remember,” eventually Uruha mumbled vaguely, his face to pillow.
“You so remember, you liar. So, what was it like?”
For a while Uruha pondered Hiroto’s question before answering it a bit hesitantly: “There were some... pink bunnies, I think, and I was wearing a wedding gown -don’t know why, though. Don't start giggling, you hear me," Uruha cast a warning look at his friend. Hiroto nodded solemnly, awaiting Uruha to continue. In his opinion, there was nothing to laugh about: he loved bunnies and Uruha would've looked nice wearing a skirt, such gorgeous legs he had.
Oblivious to Hiroto's thoughts, Uruha continued: "I was in the middle of a forest- with the bunnies, of course. Somehow I feel the bunnies were very essential in the dream- and then, suddenly, somebody started singing. Hiro, the voice... I've never heard anything like that." Uruha stared at a wall with empty, slightly drowsy eyes, trying to catch his fuzzy memories of the dream. "Saying it was beautiful would be an understatement. It was... beyond beautiful." He sighed. "I began to walk towards the voice, my heart racing faster and faster by minute. Then... I saw a man.” Uruha paused.
“And then what happened?” Hiroto asked, holding his breath.
“He was sitting on grass in the meadow that's in the forest. We've been there a couple of times, you remember the place, right? Okay." Uruha stretched his words. He had realized Hiroto was under his spell now, and there was nothing he liked more than teasing his simple friend. "All I can remember is that his face was strikingly handsome. Just when I was about to speak to him…” Uruha fell silent, emphasizing the upcoming turn in the plot, giving his excited friend a knowing look.
“And then what?” Hiroto was nearly squirming.
“And then… You came and woke me up,” Uruha ended cruelly.
Hiroto snorted, looking disappointed.
“Yosh…!” Uruha scrambled up. There seemed to be no chance whatsoever to continue slumbering, so he could get up as well. He was thirsty. A glass of water felt like a good idea.
“… Uruha? Why on Earth you are wearing a skirt?” Hiroto's puzzled question halted the other man before he got to the kitchen.
“Huh? I thought I was sleeping with my boxers on." Uruha gazed down and indeed, what Hiroto had said was true: instead of his normal sleepwear his eyes met a ruffled skirt gracing his lower body.
Uruha was too tired to care. He was a heavy drinker and this was not the first time something like this occurred. Actually, of the morning-after surprises this was definitely one of the nicest ones. At least he had woken up alone. When he thought about it, the skirt felt kind of nice, actually.
Hiroto was gaping at him. Uruha sighed. Maybe he himself didn't mind the odd outfit but Hiroto apparently did.
But, Uruha didin’t manage half a word of defense; right at that moment somebody barged in, crushing in the front door as doing so. Hiroto yelped and could only stare with enlarged eyes how the intruder stomped right to Uruha and with seeming ease, grabbed and threw the tall man onto his shoulder.
Before the stranger with ambiguous motives turned and stormed out of the room, kicking and screaming Uruha with him, Hiroto noticed two things; one, the man was indisputably shorter than his victim and yet he had just sweeped Uruha off his feet, and two, the kidnapper had the ugliest nose bandana ever -which was actually a pretty irrelevant remark but really, it was that ugly.
Hiroto snapped out of it and stormed after the men. The mysterious blonde kidnapper increased speed, heading towards the forest surrounding Uruha's home tree.
“Hiroto! Help me, you... You stupid ass!”
“But the writers of this retarded fic replaced the original script's squirrel with me!” Hiroto cried, trying to keep up with the kidnapper. "It's not my job to rescue you! And what do you expect me to do anyway? Look at those arms! That dude is frigging strong! He'd beat the hell out of me if I tried to do something!"
“I will feed you to squirrels after I've gotten rid of this man,” Uruha murmured with narrowed eyes.
"Just wait for the prince to come!" Hiroto had to give up; panting, he stopped and watched the men distancing. "There is always a prince to come at a desperate moment like this!" he hollered, hoping that Uruha would catch the last sentence.
Meanwhile, a few miles away, just as Hiroto had predicted, prince Miyavi’s ears pricked up. He listened to the rustling and screams that echoed from the forest. Satisfied, as the scene seemed dramatic enough for him to make his entry, he drew his sword and exclaimed: "It seems I have a lady in trouble to rescue!"
PAIRING/CHARACTERS: pretty much everybody :') The GazettE, Alice Nine, Kagrra,, Mana, Gackt...
RATING: PG for this chapter
GENRE: crack, AU, humor, romance
DISCLAIMER: The authors have no connections to the respective artists or movie makers; this story is completely fictional and no money is made out of it. Duh.
A/N: As the title says: this is a parody/humor/plain odd version of the movie Enchanted. The story's the same (or close enough), we just replaced Patrick Dempsey with... Ruki 8) Please, enjoy\,,/
SUMMARY: In a far-away forest there lives a young man called Uruha. His life is about to turn upside-down when he stumbles across a charming prince. Rarely, you see, a prince comes without a scheming step-motherfather in bargain...
Act. 1: In which Uruha is hangover-y and Hiroto likes climbing up to places
“Hnng…”
Uruha wrinkled his forehead. Someone else might've wrinkled his forehead in surprised confusion as hearing the odd noises but Uruha wrinkled his forehead in plain annoyance; unlike other people, Uruha knew where -or who- the noise originated from.
Rustle. Rustle.
Mice, who had recently started building a nest in the attic of his little house, weren't the reason behind the panting and rustling. Little birds playing in the trees nearby weren't responsible either for these uncomfortable sounds that had slowly deprived Uruha of his precious sleep.
Uruha tugged a blanket over his head.
Long, slender fingers grasped Uruha's bedroom's windowsill tightly. A brown, tousled mess of hair appeared behind the window. It was followed by big, keenly observing eyes, a snub nose and lastly, a widely smiling mouth. The creature peeking into the bedroom was, all in all, very adorable. Yet, however, the newcomer wasn't as adorable by his composure, as he quickly proved by losing balance and falling onto the floor with a loud and painful thump.
Uruha didn't see any of this, as he was still lurking under his sheets. He buried himself deeper under the blanket as he heard light steps approaching his bed.
“Hangover-y today, aren’t we?”
Uruha rolled onto his other side, answering the remark with icy ignorance.
"I came by yesterday. I would've wanted to play a little Scrabble with you. I had peanut butter ice cream and organically produced cider with me, even. But, you weren't at home. You ass."
“You are the one who is the ass here, Hiroto. You have to stop climbing up to my house when I’m not home. Actually, just stop doing it completely. “
“But I’m lonely…” Hiroto said and made himself comfortable at the bed foot, quickly forcing his way under the blanket.
“Whatever,” Uruha said with rolling eyes. “Shut up at least, I’m trying to sleep here.”
Hiroto nodded, watching his friend grunt and grumble as the blond man re-positioned himself comfortably.
“Did you have dreams last night?” Hiroto asked languidly, enticed by the warmth of the bed.
At first Uruha wasn't going to answer. He had never really understood why he was friends with Hiroto -the younger man was nosy, too curious for his own good and loved all the things Uruha passionately hated. Small talk just to produce sound to fulfill silence was one of these things.
“Maybe. I don’t remember,” eventually Uruha mumbled vaguely, his face to pillow.
“You so remember, you liar. So, what was it like?”
For a while Uruha pondered Hiroto’s question before answering it a bit hesitantly: “There were some... pink bunnies, I think, and I was wearing a wedding gown -don’t know why, though. Don't start giggling, you hear me," Uruha cast a warning look at his friend. Hiroto nodded solemnly, awaiting Uruha to continue. In his opinion, there was nothing to laugh about: he loved bunnies and Uruha would've looked nice wearing a skirt, such gorgeous legs he had.
Oblivious to Hiroto's thoughts, Uruha continued: "I was in the middle of a forest- with the bunnies, of course. Somehow I feel the bunnies were very essential in the dream- and then, suddenly, somebody started singing. Hiro, the voice... I've never heard anything like that." Uruha stared at a wall with empty, slightly drowsy eyes, trying to catch his fuzzy memories of the dream. "Saying it was beautiful would be an understatement. It was... beyond beautiful." He sighed. "I began to walk towards the voice, my heart racing faster and faster by minute. Then... I saw a man.” Uruha paused.
“And then what happened?” Hiroto asked, holding his breath.
“He was sitting on grass in the meadow that's in the forest. We've been there a couple of times, you remember the place, right? Okay." Uruha stretched his words. He had realized Hiroto was under his spell now, and there was nothing he liked more than teasing his simple friend. "All I can remember is that his face was strikingly handsome. Just when I was about to speak to him…” Uruha fell silent, emphasizing the upcoming turn in the plot, giving his excited friend a knowing look.
“And then what?” Hiroto was nearly squirming.
“And then… You came and woke me up,” Uruha ended cruelly.
Hiroto snorted, looking disappointed.
“Yosh…!” Uruha scrambled up. There seemed to be no chance whatsoever to continue slumbering, so he could get up as well. He was thirsty. A glass of water felt like a good idea.
“… Uruha? Why on Earth you are wearing a skirt?” Hiroto's puzzled question halted the other man before he got to the kitchen.
“Huh? I thought I was sleeping with my boxers on." Uruha gazed down and indeed, what Hiroto had said was true: instead of his normal sleepwear his eyes met a ruffled skirt gracing his lower body.
Uruha was too tired to care. He was a heavy drinker and this was not the first time something like this occurred. Actually, of the morning-after surprises this was definitely one of the nicest ones. At least he had woken up alone. When he thought about it, the skirt felt kind of nice, actually.
Hiroto was gaping at him. Uruha sighed. Maybe he himself didn't mind the odd outfit but Hiroto apparently did.
But, Uruha didin’t manage half a word of defense; right at that moment somebody barged in, crushing in the front door as doing so. Hiroto yelped and could only stare with enlarged eyes how the intruder stomped right to Uruha and with seeming ease, grabbed and threw the tall man onto his shoulder.
Before the stranger with ambiguous motives turned and stormed out of the room, kicking and screaming Uruha with him, Hiroto noticed two things; one, the man was indisputably shorter than his victim and yet he had just sweeped Uruha off his feet, and two, the kidnapper had the ugliest nose bandana ever -which was actually a pretty irrelevant remark but really, it was that ugly.
Hiroto snapped out of it and stormed after the men. The mysterious blonde kidnapper increased speed, heading towards the forest surrounding Uruha's home tree.
“Hiroto! Help me, you... You stupid ass!”
“But the writers of this retarded fic replaced the original script's squirrel with me!” Hiroto cried, trying to keep up with the kidnapper. "It's not my job to rescue you! And what do you expect me to do anyway? Look at those arms! That dude is frigging strong! He'd beat the hell out of me if I tried to do something!"
“I will feed you to squirrels after I've gotten rid of this man,” Uruha murmured with narrowed eyes.
"Just wait for the prince to come!" Hiroto had to give up; panting, he stopped and watched the men distancing. "There is always a prince to come at a desperate moment like this!" he hollered, hoping that Uruha would catch the last sentence.
Meanwhile, a few miles away, just as Hiroto had predicted, prince Miyavi’s ears pricked up. He listened to the rustling and screams that echoed from the forest. Satisfied, as the scene seemed dramatic enough for him to make his entry, he drew his sword and exclaimed: "It seems I have a lady in trouble to rescue!"