no apology because my urge is genuine
For some reason... the last few weeks have been extremely painful. I have this intense desire to erase all memories of you and I am not entirely sure why. For a couple of years "we" had been blocked from my mind and I never really thought of things that happened between us. I don't know if it is that I miss having someone around.... well actually I know I do miss that especially since it is all I hear about from several friends... but I don't miss how I felt at times during our relationship.
Last week... a post from your sister CRUSHED me. She posted pictures of two of my favorite places.. with her new boyfriend.. but they were obviously places that you showed her/told her about.. because well.. they were places you didn't know existed until I came along. And I still get along with your sister.. and it is nice to see her so happy... but it hurt.. because those things were US in a nutshell.. and they were things that I don't know if I can share them with anyone anymore. I was coming home to visit one of them next week as well.
It kills me that I hurt over you this long after.. because I really thought I had healed.. It wasn't even that terrible of a break-up... Maybe what gets me is that we are not in touch ever... and its like you are just out of reach. It has been way too long for me to not have gotten over it all. I feel like a big baby. It is difficult to explain... I don't sit around and long for you or even think about you...
I suppose it really is that I miss having someone to share my life with... and enjoy these things with. A heck of a lot.
Last week... a post from your sister CRUSHED me. She posted pictures of two of my favorite places.. with her new boyfriend.. but they were obviously places that you showed her/told her about.. because well.. they were places you didn't know existed until I came along. And I still get along with your sister.. and it is nice to see her so happy... but it hurt.. because those things were US in a nutshell.. and they were things that I don't know if I can share them with anyone anymore. I was coming home to visit one of them next week as well.
It kills me that I hurt over you this long after.. because I really thought I had healed.. It wasn't even that terrible of a break-up... Maybe what gets me is that we are not in touch ever... and its like you are just out of reach. It has been way too long for me to not have gotten over it all. I feel like a big baby. It is difficult to explain... I don't sit around and long for you or even think about you...
I suppose it really is that I miss having someone to share my life with... and enjoy these things with. A heck of a lot.