Missed Connections - the encounter
Borders Cafe, Sunday 11/26 - m4m - 32
Reply to: *******
Date: 2005-11-28, 11:33AM CST
You were working the cafe counter and the eyes met whilst you were helping out a lady with her numerous questions about the bread and such. We caught each other staring quite often. I was the boy with the large headphones, desperately tuning out the drab holiday music. If you read CL, send me some email.. and next time around I'll be a bit more bold to say hi.. :)
I posted the above on Craigslist, and really never expected a response. Especially since I didn't mention the location in the Title of the post. I did enter a more specific location, but per Cl's format, was further down. I posted it, and made a few comments to backburner about it, seeing as he was an avid craigslister I had asked him what the probability that I'd get a hit. He didn't think it was too high, so I never gave it much thought and move on..
Then, December 2nd, I receive this email:
Hi
My friend at work got an e-mail from a friend of his about this posting, lol. So
yeah I was working the Cafe on the 11/26 (that was a Saturday). Sorry but I
don't think I remember you but definitely say hi next time you're around and you
see me. I'll be working tonight and all this weekend.
(name withheld to protect some privacy)
note: the below is being transcribed from a written journal, and aside from grammatical corrections, I am not changing the arrangement of said ideas or how I initially *wrote* this entry.
Well, apparently my "Missed Connections" post turned into "the joke of the store" according to said subject's co-worker. I stopped off at the aforementioned Borders today for some coffee and yes, to finally "meet" this person I wrote of in my MC. I asked him if he knew anyone by the name of "said person", well, because his name tag said another name, not his actual name. He asked, "Why do you want to know?" So I spilt the beans that it was me who made the CL post. He then finally said his name and I left it at that, despite the name tag saying otherwise. He also asked me who was working that particular Sunday, I said, "well, you and two girls.: At this point I felt totally weird and a bit humiliated that the whole thing (CL post) turned into a big joke at this place. I also felt a bit upset that I caused him a bit of embarrassment. It was not my intention for this whole thing to be a source of embarrassment or a joke.
Anyway, I shook his hand and told him it was nice to met and then walked away. I walked back to my table with fresh coffee, shaking a slight bit, feeling paranoid that he might think I was some crazy stalker and the store manager(s) would kick me out. What I left out of this is that also during the conversation I mentioned to him that I was just trying out the "Missed Connections" thing cause I had a feeling like it wouldn't work and wanted to prove it. - Perhaps dumb of me to say, but said it was.
In analyzing the whole situation, I think people don't trust these public means of getting in touch with someone that they perhaps saw one or a few times. They treat these means as a novelty and if it were to really pan out, how strange and odd and perhaps freaky! It is small part because people don't like other people stalking them when the person "stalking" might actually just be innocently shy and find it difficult to take the direct approach the first time, to say hi. The world is a small place, but with tools CL provides, like "Missed Connections" we can take this small place and make it as large or as small(er) as our minds would like it.
--After thoughts--
Reading some of the posts on "Missed Connections" reveals a lot about how people think/treat/deal with each other, in real & cyber life. In the "MC" posts specific to Chicagoland (haven't checked out any other cities yet) I've read some really sincere "I really wish we could meet" posts, to the "I'm a big stalker" posts and they mean it! Often many posts are repeated day after day. Other posts are simple monologues that read more like blogging posts you'd find here on LJ or other popular blog sites. I've also come across a few posts that were outright disturbing as they were a direct victim reaction to possible criminal activities (burglary, assaults/battery, etc) Then there are posts of the exact opposite of "Missed Connections", - the "Stay Away from me" ones..
So will I ever make a post again to "Missed Connections"? despite this experience, probably. I'm by nature a risk taker and without taking risks, life is not worth living. "Missed Connections" get ready, cause here I come.