Holiday bitterness
So here it comes. My holiday bitterness is starting to rear it's ugly head. All year long, I do fine with the kids and their visitation schedules and the sharing and then Thanksgiving and Christmas come along again and I find myself pissed off. I HATE having to share my kids during the Holidays. I am annoyed at trying to arrange everyone's schedules so that we can try to line up a time that my family of 5 can actually sit down and celebrate as a family. I don't like that there are 4 sets of grandparents and 2 sets of parents for each kid that are fighting to get a piece of MY kid for those coveted days. I always feel angry at the ex-husband this time of year, because I can't help feeling like it is his fault that I have to share. If he hadn't made the decisions that he did, I wouldn't be in this predicament. I would have my beautiful little girl for every blessed holiday and each and every weekend. And Sean's ex-wife....I can't help feeling pissed that she cancels her weekend visits so regularly that we don't even tell Garret he is going to see her until he is in the car on the way, for fear of disappointing him when she backs out. However, she acts like she is entitled to have him every single holiday just so she can make a big "show" of being such a great mom for her relatives. What about the other 360 days of the year when Garret needs a mom? Why am I the one who has to do all the hard work, but never gets to enjoy the kids on the fun days? I know in my heart that I have to share them, that everyone loves them and just wants to enjoy them too, but I can't help feeling bitter about it.