Life has (REAL) Changed
I hold a promise.
Sept 30, 2012
I always "clean" my own mind.
After school, after terrible things happened, after things didn't work like I want,
I often did the "cleaning" again, and again.
Just like a cycle,
I thought it's natural. As a human being, it's hard to always "stable" and being a "goog-guy Greg" every time.
But I didn't want to be unstable like this time being.
I realized humans' life were not long.
Ya, really-really realized.
Really-really realized that:
"People was born on earth to suffer"
Okay, then remember the promise:
I will live my life to the fullest. Never wasting my time again. I will be stronger.
I want to meet you when I can smile not with fake smile.
Okay, I should bear the challenges patiently and continue study, graduate with the best.
YEAH. I BELIEVE, I CAN, AND I WILL DO IT!!!
I always angry because I can accept and think "why did I???" "why did.....?" etc.
But yea, I'm on the right track.
It's my own decision. my decision to live like this. Perhaps my condition now is not my decision, but the beginning was chosen by "myself".
To be "happy", perhaps we should "unhappy" at first. And someday if I keep on this right track, I will be happy, in originality,
I kept this kind of life like...a half? or less?
Why I should waste my time that "not long" and keep protest in the life I chose by myself?
AND THE RULE IS TO SUFFER FIRST?
I kept hurt people in my past, and didn't realize even not directly I broke other dreams?
Mom, bro, "sister"
Why?
Also, I damage part of my own life.
Because I'm being stubborn. Because I didn't really believe with my chosen kind of life.
I often frustrated and can't forgive myself. Bragging to many people. Damage further.
But I should believe the past was about the me that can't understand more about "the concept of suffering". And the me now is different. I SHOULD BELIEVE.
I can't brag them anymore.
I should keep the suffers alone and bear them.
And do the thing I should continue,
Be patience,
Pray,
Manage money, even I need that to relieved myself, and
Don't brag others.
"only" that. And at least I continue my chosen kind of life. The right track. Original happiness.
Perhaps the suffer is the result of my own fault in the past.
I should be gentle enough to face that.
And life is about suffering at the first.
Sept 30, 2012
I always "clean" my own mind.
After school, after terrible things happened, after things didn't work like I want,
I often did the "cleaning" again, and again.
Just like a cycle,
I thought it's natural. As a human being, it's hard to always "stable" and being a "goog-guy Greg" every time.
But I didn't want to be unstable like this time being.
I realized humans' life were not long.
Ya, really-really realized.
Really-really realized that:
"People was born on earth to suffer"
Okay, then remember the promise:
I will live my life to the fullest. Never wasting my time again. I will be stronger.
I want to meet you when I can smile not with fake smile.
Okay, I should bear the challenges patiently and continue study, graduate with the best.
YEAH. I BELIEVE, I CAN, AND I WILL DO IT!!!
I always angry because I can accept and think "why did I???" "why did.....?" etc.
But yea, I'm on the right track.
It's my own decision. my decision to live like this. Perhaps my condition now is not my decision, but the beginning was chosen by "myself".
To be "happy", perhaps we should "unhappy" at first. And someday if I keep on this right track, I will be happy, in originality,
I kept this kind of life like...a half? or less?
Why I should waste my time that "not long" and keep protest in the life I chose by myself?
AND THE RULE IS TO SUFFER FIRST?
I kept hurt people in my past, and didn't realize even not directly I broke other dreams?
Mom, bro, "sister"
Why?
Also, I damage part of my own life.
Because I'm being stubborn. Because I didn't really believe with my chosen kind of life.
I often frustrated and can't forgive myself. Bragging to many people. Damage further.
But I should believe the past was about the me that can't understand more about "the concept of suffering". And the me now is different. I SHOULD BELIEVE.
I can't brag them anymore.
I should keep the suffers alone and bear them.
And do the thing I should continue,
Be patience,
Pray,
Manage money, even I need that to relieved myself, and
Don't brag others.
"only" that. And at least I continue my chosen kind of life. The right track. Original happiness.
Perhaps the suffer is the result of my own fault in the past.
I should be gentle enough to face that.
And life is about suffering at the first.