i feel so untouched

[summerjadie]

literally, i am sick to my stomach. i am in so much pain right now. i am still, in like-love-lust, whatever the fuck it is- with joshua and i am almost sure this feeling is never going away. we just talked or whatever, and he said he has never even thought twice about dating me. so yeah that should be a turn off? yet.. ? and logan's btiching at me to just stop talking to him? joshua is like my best friend.. stop talking to him is like.. hell. it hurts, more than i could've ever imagined-- remix. so after a week or so passing i finally understood what he really meant and its slowly turning me off from him. yeah, i still love him but i dont get that bubbly feeling. actually tonight i hate his guts. he thinks everyone is going to hand him everything and really its just not happening. at first i wanted him to go with me to sandusky but time away from him will prob be the best thing for me, and our friendship.. for real. speaking of i cant wait to move up there, it'll be so exciting-scary, sad-but exciting! :)

senioritissss. sigh