Full House says it best
So working with a girl who is addicted to Full House has its perks. I won't complain. It leaves with me either a whole hour of do whatever I want time cuz she won't move or hey watch a cute show. pretty funny this show. literally our day revolves around it. if we go in the pool we have to go at either eleven cuz we need to be back in by noon or go at one cuz you know gotta watch full house. can't miss a single show.
so in today's episode jesse and becky were in a fight. it was about doing things that only the other person liked and jesse not doing anything becky liked (like horse back riding). anyway it hit home because this was the first argument me and steve ever had. but no I did not want to go horseback riding. and no it was not a fight for us because in my mind that means raised voices, mean things and days not talking. and we haven't succomed to that.. yet. anyway so jesse and becky had a full out fight about this and ended up realizing that they can be there own people and to do things because they wanted to not because they felt they had to but they also realized that a fight is about understanding the other person better.
and that my friend is very wise. so for a good month now.. my months start the fourteenth when dealing with the boy, we've been arguing, more and more. and I finally was like dude what is wrong with us. we were happy for so long. and things come up after awhile that's fine but seriously yesterday it was to the point where I was seriously doubting things, us, the future, our relationship. and that was simply not a good feeling. now I won't get into all the gruesome details of what we argue about cuz you've all been there or you don't want to hear about it.
but its funny cuz in a way we do get to know eachother better and I see her point.
except it also worries me. and here's why. I am always the one with the problem. Steve does something that upsets me, says something, reacts in some way and then I have to bring it up, only after he realizes I'm mad and then coaxes it out of me cuz I hate actually telling him. but its always me with the problem. and he's always like no its okay, I'd rather know, if we discuss it we can make it work, I can change or whatever and that is why we are going to last cuz you tell me stuff. (I told him yesterday that sometimes he can be very rude which apparently no girl has ever told him and he's like see that's why we are going to make it.. haha okay)When I probe him for something, anything, that bothers him about me he's got nothing (except that I wont' make him deli sandwhiches when we are together but that is like me asking him to hang out with clowns for a day so its simply not comparable ) He says that he has been in enough relationships and has realized to let little things slide and that if something comes up he just accepts it at me.
so this makes me feel awful. when he tells me this its suppossed to be to be nice but then I'm like great so I'm not accepting, I'm making you change, I'm bothered by things you do and you got nothing. and that makes me feel bad. if something bothered him, something I could work on, or even something that he could talk to me about, be upset at me for (he doesn't like the way I handle things when I get upset cuz I wait too long to tell him but that's ironic or something cuz the only thing that even slightly bothers him is when I'm already upset)
So I asked him if there was something wrong with me. Do I nitpick. Should I accept things? He said to birng up things that bother him. but I don't know if I should. and obviously I dont' all the time... but am I not accepting. or is it a girl thing. or what. like I just don't know. he said to ask a girl in a relationship so I'll do you one better and put it out there for debate and thought. yes you. thanks
and just to let you know, yesterday went fine, we are good and seriously after we talk I think it brings us closer because I only get upset because I care and when I don't tell him right away he gets all scared and worried which shows he cares and we talk about it and discuss and that just makes it so much better. so we had a good day, seeing as what we started with, him arriving with out calling (happens often since the house line is often busy) with me balling my eyes out. woops. so its all good, maybe even better.
okay let me know.
have a good week.
and see you all soon.
so in today's episode jesse and becky were in a fight. it was about doing things that only the other person liked and jesse not doing anything becky liked (like horse back riding). anyway it hit home because this was the first argument me and steve ever had. but no I did not want to go horseback riding. and no it was not a fight for us because in my mind that means raised voices, mean things and days not talking. and we haven't succomed to that.. yet. anyway so jesse and becky had a full out fight about this and ended up realizing that they can be there own people and to do things because they wanted to not because they felt they had to but they also realized that a fight is about understanding the other person better.
and that my friend is very wise. so for a good month now.. my months start the fourteenth when dealing with the boy, we've been arguing, more and more. and I finally was like dude what is wrong with us. we were happy for so long. and things come up after awhile that's fine but seriously yesterday it was to the point where I was seriously doubting things, us, the future, our relationship. and that was simply not a good feeling. now I won't get into all the gruesome details of what we argue about cuz you've all been there or you don't want to hear about it.
but its funny cuz in a way we do get to know eachother better and I see her point.
except it also worries me. and here's why. I am always the one with the problem. Steve does something that upsets me, says something, reacts in some way and then I have to bring it up, only after he realizes I'm mad and then coaxes it out of me cuz I hate actually telling him. but its always me with the problem. and he's always like no its okay, I'd rather know, if we discuss it we can make it work, I can change or whatever and that is why we are going to last cuz you tell me stuff. (I told him yesterday that sometimes he can be very rude which apparently no girl has ever told him and he's like see that's why we are going to make it.. haha okay)When I probe him for something, anything, that bothers him about me he's got nothing (except that I wont' make him deli sandwhiches when we are together but that is like me asking him to hang out with clowns for a day so its simply not comparable ) He says that he has been in enough relationships and has realized to let little things slide and that if something comes up he just accepts it at me.
so this makes me feel awful. when he tells me this its suppossed to be to be nice but then I'm like great so I'm not accepting, I'm making you change, I'm bothered by things you do and you got nothing. and that makes me feel bad. if something bothered him, something I could work on, or even something that he could talk to me about, be upset at me for (he doesn't like the way I handle things when I get upset cuz I wait too long to tell him but that's ironic or something cuz the only thing that even slightly bothers him is when I'm already upset)
So I asked him if there was something wrong with me. Do I nitpick. Should I accept things? He said to birng up things that bother him. but I don't know if I should. and obviously I dont' all the time... but am I not accepting. or is it a girl thing. or what. like I just don't know. he said to ask a girl in a relationship so I'll do you one better and put it out there for debate and thought. yes you. thanks
and just to let you know, yesterday went fine, we are good and seriously after we talk I think it brings us closer because I only get upset because I care and when I don't tell him right away he gets all scared and worried which shows he cares and we talk about it and discuss and that just makes it so much better. so we had a good day, seeing as what we started with, him arriving with out calling (happens often since the house line is often busy) with me balling my eyes out. woops. so its all good, maybe even better.
okay let me know.
have a good week.
and see you all soon.