So pissed and sooo stressed.......
So Jaimin's had his 2 month doctor's appointment set up fer like a MONTH now and my MOM is the one that scheduled it, making sure that it was on the exact same day as my neice Dezi's so that they could go together and not haveta worry about gas or ne thang like that. WELL I guess now she might not be taking us because of the fact that she has counceling shit with Shelby in Muncie and she's taking Dezi but she's going straight from Lebanan ta Muncie. So she'll be gone ALL DAY!! I'm talking like from the appointments are at 10:45 and they wouldn't be gettin back until around 5-6!!! Yeah, I REALLY don't want my mom ta have Jaimin all day like that. I mean when we're over there and even when we LIVED there she would hold him for maybe 5 minutes TOP and only watch him if he was sleeping or if we were only gonna be gone fer like a half hour-an hour. And I mean she's takin him before ta see Shelby but that was during visitation not during counceling. And since Dezi is gettin shots too so she's gonna be a COMPLETE pain in the ass cuz she's ALWAYS like that after she has shots and Idk how Jaimin's gonna re-act because of the fact that the only shots that he's ever had were when he was just born. But BUT the WORST part about it is that she hasn't even freakin CALLED TO LET ME KNOW NE THANG ABOUT IT!! And her phone is shut off, kinna, she can make outgoing calls but not get ne incomming calls, so it's not as if I can just call and ask!!! I'm sooo pissed off. Cuz I mean, she could have at LEAST been responsible enough to call and let me know everythang! She's suppose ta be MY mom not me be hers! And everyone else that can take me are, working, or in school! And he hasta go becausea the shots.
And then John and my ONE YEAR anniversery is comming up THIS Sunday and you know what this Sunday just SO happenz ta be?!? Super Bowl Weekend! And My manajor already said that If we are scheduled that day we are NOT aloud to call in or ne thang like that because of needing people or somethang like that ( even though not everyone is working that day, so it's not like they couldn't just call someone in) and if we do call in or not show up we getta write up and fewer hours and guess who works ALL DAY?!? YEAH ME!! And I'm only working 3 days as it is so if I were ta call in or not show up they'd prolly fire me cuz I mean, what hours do I have ta cut?!? NONE! I mean I'm making LESS than 200$ this paycheck....less than 200$ for TWO WEEKS OF WORK!! Yeah thats how bad it is. I'm puttin in applications EVERYWHERE! And praying EXTREMLY hard that I can just getta new freakin job with more hours. I wanna be able ta get my own place and have nice things and start making payments on a car just like I was saying in my last entry but how in the hell am I suppose ta do all that with a baby and alla his expenses and only making 200$ every two weeks?!?
Right now life seems so impossible...and like it's never going to get better...I know I'm looking on the negative side of things but how can I not. Living here makes me sick, LITERALLY, it's GREAT that John's Granma is letting us stay here without charging us ne thang or ne thang like that...but I'm just so sick of it! I HATE it here, and I HATE having ta sleep on the floor, and be froze out every fuckin night because she's "too hot" and turns down the heat ta a couple degrees above what it is outside...well thats what it feels like ne ways.
Pray fer me and Jaimin and John PLEASE!!
Crys-Lyn Shahan
And then John and my ONE YEAR anniversery is comming up THIS Sunday and you know what this Sunday just SO happenz ta be?!? Super Bowl Weekend! And My manajor already said that If we are scheduled that day we are NOT aloud to call in or ne thang like that because of needing people or somethang like that ( even though not everyone is working that day, so it's not like they couldn't just call someone in) and if we do call in or not show up we getta write up and fewer hours and guess who works ALL DAY?!? YEAH ME!! And I'm only working 3 days as it is so if I were ta call in or not show up they'd prolly fire me cuz I mean, what hours do I have ta cut?!? NONE! I mean I'm making LESS than 200$ this paycheck....less than 200$ for TWO WEEKS OF WORK!! Yeah thats how bad it is. I'm puttin in applications EVERYWHERE! And praying EXTREMLY hard that I can just getta new freakin job with more hours. I wanna be able ta get my own place and have nice things and start making payments on a car just like I was saying in my last entry but how in the hell am I suppose ta do all that with a baby and alla his expenses and only making 200$ every two weeks?!?
Right now life seems so impossible...and like it's never going to get better...I know I'm looking on the negative side of things but how can I not. Living here makes me sick, LITERALLY, it's GREAT that John's Granma is letting us stay here without charging us ne thang or ne thang like that...but I'm just so sick of it! I HATE it here, and I HATE having ta sleep on the floor, and be froze out every fuckin night because she's "too hot" and turns down the heat ta a couple degrees above what it is outside...well thats what it feels like ne ways.
Pray fer me and Jaimin and John PLEASE!!
Crys-Lyn Shahan