Count down to manhood
In the words of a young Anakin Skywalker, "Weeeeeell, not exactly..." You know, after Clone wars and Revenge of the Sith, The Phantom Menace really doesn't seem so bad. Oh wait no, it's still awful. This has a point. I think.
One of my many christmas gifts this year was a set of three Nintendo DS styluses made to look just like Obi-wan's, Luke's, and Darth Vader's light sabres. It was probably one of the most thoughtful gifts my mom has ever given me. I have also decided to focus on this fact rather than the fact that she bought me girl's pajamas even after I told her to stop pressuring me to wear girl's clothes.
Anyway to get to the real point of this entry, in 5 days almost exactly I'll be switching to the use of male pronouns and changing my name (not legally yet). I've been worrying about it for the last week, not my usual serious worry where I can't sleep or I get sick. Ok longer than a week, much longer. I've been having doubts sort of, not in the sense that I'm questioning what I'm doing, just whether or not I'm ready for it and whether or not my family is.
I spent a large part of the day today at my, uh for lack of a better term, extended step family gathering. It's always been one of the highlights of Christmas to me, mostly because I love spending time with my two queer step aunts. They are, after all, my queer welcoming committee as they like to call themselves. Unfortunately only one of them could be there so it wasn't quite the party it could have been but it was still great. Sidetracked! So when we were all leaving my brother got my sisters and I together for one big group hug and said "Three sister hug!". To my extremely pleasent surprise my sister was quicker on the draw than me and said "Only for a few more days!" a remark on my fast approaching pronoun change. To my even greater surprise, my brothers and sisters responded with enthusiasm. I didn't give my siblings enough credit. In that moment they reminded me that this isn't a time to worry, I won't have to awkwardly correct them when they make mistakes they'll correct each other with good nature and humor. They'll take it in stride, welcoming the change as a chance to truly get to know me.
I was worried about new years day. Now I'm excited. I can't wait for male pronouns.
One of my many christmas gifts this year was a set of three Nintendo DS styluses made to look just like Obi-wan's, Luke's, and Darth Vader's light sabres. It was probably one of the most thoughtful gifts my mom has ever given me. I have also decided to focus on this fact rather than the fact that she bought me girl's pajamas even after I told her to stop pressuring me to wear girl's clothes.
Anyway to get to the real point of this entry, in 5 days almost exactly I'll be switching to the use of male pronouns and changing my name (not legally yet). I've been worrying about it for the last week, not my usual serious worry where I can't sleep or I get sick. Ok longer than a week, much longer. I've been having doubts sort of, not in the sense that I'm questioning what I'm doing, just whether or not I'm ready for it and whether or not my family is.
I spent a large part of the day today at my, uh for lack of a better term, extended step family gathering. It's always been one of the highlights of Christmas to me, mostly because I love spending time with my two queer step aunts. They are, after all, my queer welcoming committee as they like to call themselves. Unfortunately only one of them could be there so it wasn't quite the party it could have been but it was still great. Sidetracked! So when we were all leaving my brother got my sisters and I together for one big group hug and said "Three sister hug!". To my extremely pleasent surprise my sister was quicker on the draw than me and said "Only for a few more days!" a remark on my fast approaching pronoun change. To my even greater surprise, my brothers and sisters responded with enthusiasm. I didn't give my siblings enough credit. In that moment they reminded me that this isn't a time to worry, I won't have to awkwardly correct them when they make mistakes they'll correct each other with good nature and humor. They'll take it in stride, welcoming the change as a chance to truly get to know me.
I was worried about new years day. Now I'm excited. I can't wait for male pronouns.