.i didn't know that we could break a silver lining.
Title: Sparks the Wildfire (part 3)
Author: Lexie (
suivreletoile)
Pairing/Character: Veronica, Lilly, Logan, Duncan (Veronica/Duncan, Veronica/Logan)
Word Count: 2,807
Rating: PG-13 for sex.
Spoilers: Season 1.
Warnings: There's some sex.
Prologue Part 1 Part 2
Summary: "My eyes were open, and while everything else was fuzzy, the image of his face below me as we struggled underwater was perfectly clear."
When Duncan and I dated in high school, I would sometimes imagine what our first time together would be like. It had been assumed we would lose our virginity to each other one day. We were the perfect couple and we were the talk of the school. It was one of those time warp things of high school. Just a matter of months felt like a lifetime. I couldn’t see a beginning or end of our relationship. We always were, and always would be. And one day he’d make love to me for the first time, and of course, all I knew about sex was from the movies or what Lilly had told me. So in my head, it was always a vague concept with images close to the lustful scenes I would see on T.V. It was always sweet and slow and under the sheets and the exacts weren’t very clear to me.
Of course our relationship ended before it could ever get that far, and my first time was with Troy Vandergraff, a bad boy who left my life as suddenly as he had entered it.
One thing I hadn’t been prepared for was the pain, and how awkward I felt around him right afterwards. I also didn’t expect to be so attached to him, so emotional in the days that followed. Lilly had always acted like it was no big deal. Sex was just a way to have fun, and there wasn’t much else to it. But I would go from elated to devastated and back again for days after sleeping with Troy, and by then, Lilly was a faint image in my life and my closest friend was a guy, so I kept it to myself and just assumed it meant I was crazy.
The awkwardness eased each time Troy and I had sex, but then his bad behaviour got him sent to boarding school, and I barely got to say goodbye. It wasn’t easier or harder than losing Duncan, it was just different. And it was the end of my sex life in high school. I wasn’t really interested in anybody else; I didn’t have the time. And I couldn’t afford to invest so much of myself. I figured I would have plenty of opportunities in college.
And after sleeping with Troy, I never thought about sex with Duncan again. Not until that night in June.
He’d been coming to the café for several days, dropping by after work to pick up something to drink or sit there with a book and cake.
“So is this just innocent stalking or should I break out my pepper spray sometime soon?” I joked as I came to clear the plate and mug on his table.
He looked up from his book and smiled at me. “You’re not the one who should be worrying, it’s the cake.”
I laughed. “In that case, your waist line should also be concerned.”
“I have an excellent metabolism,” he countered.
“Well it’s official then. I hate you,” I joked.
He chuckled and we both looked at each other for a moment. “You have a break any time soon?” He asked.
“I’m actually getting off work in about fifteen.”
“Well you should come join me when you’re done.”
I nodded. “Will do.” I turned around and walked back to the counter with a grin on my face.
It took us half an hour for us to finish our conversation about everything from college to late night T.V., and another four minutes for us to walk out to his car, where he took thirty seconds before leaning in to kiss me while I was pressed up against the passenger door. It took ten seconds for me to remember exactly how he liked to be kissed and another minute before we moved our makeout session into the inside of the car.
The intensity grew, and I could feel his hard-on rub against my thigh. I bucked against him and let a moan escape my lips. My hands were on his waist, he reached for my belt, and I trembled. If I hadn’t been so wrapped up in him, I would have remembered I was wearing my unattractive uniform, I reeked of coffee, and my hair desperately needed to be washed. But the desire I’d once had for him was rushing back to me and I could have sworn the heat between us was a fire.
“Not. Here,” I panted between kisses.
He nodded, and stopped momentarily to ask, “My place?”
I thought about this. Answering this question was basically agreeing to do what we were about to do. This wasn’t sudden, this was long overdue. I shook my head. “No, mine. Empty.”
He nodded again and climbed into the driver’s seat.
My bed wasn’t as big as his, but we didn’t really notice. It started out soft and gentle, then went back to rushed and eager. I could hear myself panting, and felt his hot breath on my skin.
When we finished, I lay entangled in his arms and he combed his fingers through my hair gently, our naked bodies lying on top of the sheets, feeling the cold breeze from the air conditioner.
Our second time around was less hasty and more calculated. I’d close my eyes and when I’d open them again, I’d see him over me and realise that even after all these years, to me, he was perfect.
In the end I had to tell him to go, out of fear my father would come home from work and find him in my bed. He promised to call me the next day.
He did. And he took me out that weekend. It was then that we discovered that we wouldn’t be able to even feign the sort of relationship we once had.
The conversation throughout the night was awkward and sometimes forced. He was quieter than I had remembered, and I was far more forward than I had once been. I talked about France and Boston, and he talked about his internship at the Mayor’s office. He told me about the cutting of certain research grants in California, and I described the reading I saw of an obscure poet in Nice. And that was when we talked at all.
He’d reach to hold my hand, but he didn’t know I preferred to hold with my right hand, so I held his hand feeling awkward until I finally just let go.
He dropped me off at the end of the night and kissed me on the cheek. He didn’t say he’d call me later, for which I was grateful.
---
“Isn’t this a little backwards?” Lilly wondered loudly.
I pushed off the side of the pool and glided to the middle, paddling toward Lilly.
She treaded water with her big pink pool noodle and motioned towards the guys tanning with their eyes closed on the deck. “Aren’t WE supposed to be sun bathing at the side while they goof around in the pool?”
I contemplated this for a moment. “They’re pansies,” I grinned.
Duncan just ignored us, while Logan peaked open his right eye for a moment, and gave me the contemptuous look. Lilly and I both howled with laughter.
She paddled slowly around in the pool, making light splashes as her hands hit the water.
I closed my eyes and submerged myself under the water. I opened my eyes and could see Lilly’s body, and her dark blue bathing suit. At least, that’s what I assumed. She wasn’t clearly defined. While underwater, the lines were blurred, the colours faded and fuzzy, and distance was difficult to gage. But I knew she was there.
All of a sudden, there was the muffled sound of two giant crashes one right after another, and two more fuzzy forms were visible under the water. I quickly emerged from under the water and gasped for breath as I resurfaced. Duncan was splashing around as Lilly scowled at him for causing such a ruckus. Suddenly I felt arms embrace me from behind, holding onto me tightly.
I shrieked, and Logan chuckled into my ear.
“Let go of me!” I yelped.
He pushed me under the water again, but let go of me quickly and I flailed as I bounced back up to the top again.
“That was for calling us pansies!” he grinned.
Lilly and Duncan both laughed, and I leapt in Logan’s direction, pushing him and submerging us both below the surface this time.
My eyes were open, and while everything else was fuzzy, the image of his face below me as we struggled underwater was perfectly clear.
---
“So what’s the deal with you and my brother?”
“Gee, why does that sound familiar?”
“Because you can’t seem to stay away from Donut?” She fanned her hands in the air, trying to dry the nail polish on them.
I leaned back into my pillow, closing the bottle of Satin Red I’d just used on her nails. “How did you know, anyway?
“I didn’t,” she grinned. “I just guessed.”
I rolled my eyes. “Right.”
“Is this like... True love rekindling?”
“Did he tell you?” It seemed unlikely Duncan would discuss his sex life with his sister.
“... Or is it just for fun?” She looked at me suspiciously, as if the possibility of me sleeping with her brother were a mystery that needed to be solved.
I sighed. “Can we not talk about this?”
She shrugged and sprawled out on the foot of my bed. “So what the hell are you going to do with a degree in Journalism and French?”
“Well I was thinking about finding world peace and ending hunger.”
“Yeah? And AFTER you’re Miss America, what then?”
“I don’t know. Work as a journalist. Or a photojournalist. And maybe go back to France.” I thought about this for a moment. “What made you go into pre-med?”
“I didn’t. I thought I was signing up for fashion design.”
---
Even almost a month after I slept with Duncan, I couldn’t seem to get away from the concept of him and I together.
“So are you dating Duncan again?”
“How long have you been waiting to ask that, Mom?”
“It’s just that I called the apartment and your father said you were out with Duncan.”
“Just because we spend time together doesn’t mean-- god, are you still in high school?”
“There’s no need to take that tone, Veronica.” I was sure she found me as exhausting as I found her.
“How are you, Mom?” My voice became softer, but concerned.
“I’m your mother. I should be asking you that. And with everything that’s happ-”
“Mom!” Backup jumped from his spot at the foot of my bed, alarmed by my sudden and whiney tone.
I could hear her sigh through the phone, resigned. “I’m fine, sweetie. How’s your summer going?”
“It’s fine.”
“You miss Boston?”
“I miss France even more.”
The line went silent, and I heard some people talking in the background. It almost hurt, how strained our conversations had become. Mothers and daughters aren’t supposed to be like this, I told myself.
But it was ok. I was dealing. Even without her and my dad, I was ok, because I wasn’t alone for the meantime. I had something I could immerse myself in, even though I knew it would be short-lived. It was another time warp; I could pretend the past and the future didn’t exist as long as I was wrapped up in the summer.
“Veronica?” My mother’s voice startled me out of my trance.
“Yeah?”
“I should probably let you go.”
“Yeah, I need to take Backup out.”
“Bye honey.”
“Bye Mom.”
I turned my phone off and hugged my pillow. She would be done with rehab in about two weeks, which meant I’d be able to go stay with her in Texas, away from Neptune, if I wanted. I was a twenty-year-old who just wanted her mommy. At the same time, I was quite enjoying my time warp. To leave would be returning to real life again.
---
“Does anybody care that this band is so five minutes ago?” Lilly moaned as we stood in line.
“Only you, Lilly. Only you.” Duncan replied dryly.
“Panic! At the Disco is a really stupid name.”
I turned to Lilly and retorted, “You have the same name as a flower. I don’t think you’re really in a position to criticise.”
The guys both chuckled lightly and Lilly shut up. I didn’t really care about seeing the show either way. I don’t think the guys did either. But it was an excuse to come out to L.A. instead of being in Neptune on a Friday night.
We made our way in, and it was already swimming with people. By the time the opening act started, the place was packed.
“I think I just saw a twelve year old!” Lilly announced loudly.
“Well that’s disturbing, seeing as they would have been like, nine when these guys came out,” Logan replied.
We all got drinks; we picked a spot far enough away that we wouldn’t be mobbed by crazy fans and close enough to see well. Of course, being only about five foot one, it was hard to see at all.
Logan leaned over and murmured, “You need me to give you a lift?”
I stuck my tongue out at him.
“I think we’ve lost Lilly.” Duncan motioned to his sister, who had drifted away and was talking to two guys who were definitely not twelve.
The headliners started to play and the crowd went crazy.
“You know, I can’t remember the last time I went to a concert,” Logan noted.
“Me either,” I agreed. “And I don’t even know any of the songs they’ve played so far.”
We looked at the crowd, then at each other, then laughed. We were by far more subdued than most of the people around us.
Duncan started to drift away from us as well, and I started to get bored.
“Come on, I’m sure we can still hear the bad music from outside, too,” Logan said tugging at my arm. I followed without hesitation.
We stumbled into the side alley, gasping for hot and muggy air.
“Fuck, since when do twelve-year-olds wear so much bad perfume?” Logan moaned.
“Fuck, why the hell is it so hot even at night?”
“It’s California, Ronnie, what did you expect? You grew up here, remember?”
“You’re not supposed to call me Ronnie, remember?”
“But it fits you so well,” he replied, looking me over. “By the way, why did you start dressing like, you know...” He motioned at my clothes, then pulled out a pack of cigarettes from his back pocket.
“What, you don’t like it?” I said in an exaggerated girly voice, as if I really cared, and then reached over to take a cigarette out of the pack before he closed it up again.
He raised his eyebrows. “You smoke, too?”
I shrugged. “Not really. Social smoker, you could say. Habit I picked up in France.”
“Impressive.”
“Yeah, I thought so.”
He held the lighter for me so I could light my cigarette, and then lit his own.
“So you work a lot, don’t you?”
I nodded, “Think I would get bored otherwise.” Pause. “What about you? How do you spend your time when you’re not relishing spending time with us?”
He hesitated, “I’ve been working at a publishing house part time, actually.”
“Really!?” I tried not to sound too surprised, but I probably wasn’t very successful.
He didn’t seem to mind. “Yeah, it doesn’t pay much, and it can be boring at times, but it’s better than nothing.”
“And what prompted this career move?”
“Well I study Mass Comm., so I guess it’s kind of related...”
“Do you enjoy it?” He nodded. “Well that’s great then, Logan,” I grinned. “It’s more than I can say about working at the café.”
I heard the band start playing a new song and gasped, “This is the only song of theirs I know and like!”
“You want to go back in?”
“Nope,” I said immediately. I finished my cigarette and started humming along to the song.
He finished his, and continued on to his second. “It’s strange. Even when you seem happy, singing or whatever, you still have that look on your face.”
I looked at him, confused, “What look?”
“You know, that look. Like you’re ready to run at any moment.”
My suitemate in sophomore year, Kelly, had told me something similar once. “Yeah...” Was the only answer I could come up with.
He looked at me as if waiting for further explanation, but I gave him none. “Is that why you went to France?”
“I went to France to get laid,” I joked half-heartedly.
“If you say so.”
Author: Lexie (
suivreletoile)
Pairing/Character: Veronica, Lilly, Logan, Duncan (Veronica/Duncan, Veronica/Logan)
Word Count: 2,807
Rating: PG-13 for sex.
Spoilers: Season 1.
Warnings: There's some sex.
Prologue Part 1 Part 2
Summary: "My eyes were open, and while everything else was fuzzy, the image of his face below me as we struggled underwater was perfectly clear."
When Duncan and I dated in high school, I would sometimes imagine what our first time together would be like. It had been assumed we would lose our virginity to each other one day. We were the perfect couple and we were the talk of the school. It was one of those time warp things of high school. Just a matter of months felt like a lifetime. I couldn’t see a beginning or end of our relationship. We always were, and always would be. And one day he’d make love to me for the first time, and of course, all I knew about sex was from the movies or what Lilly had told me. So in my head, it was always a vague concept with images close to the lustful scenes I would see on T.V. It was always sweet and slow and under the sheets and the exacts weren’t very clear to me.
Of course our relationship ended before it could ever get that far, and my first time was with Troy Vandergraff, a bad boy who left my life as suddenly as he had entered it.
One thing I hadn’t been prepared for was the pain, and how awkward I felt around him right afterwards. I also didn’t expect to be so attached to him, so emotional in the days that followed. Lilly had always acted like it was no big deal. Sex was just a way to have fun, and there wasn’t much else to it. But I would go from elated to devastated and back again for days after sleeping with Troy, and by then, Lilly was a faint image in my life and my closest friend was a guy, so I kept it to myself and just assumed it meant I was crazy.
The awkwardness eased each time Troy and I had sex, but then his bad behaviour got him sent to boarding school, and I barely got to say goodbye. It wasn’t easier or harder than losing Duncan, it was just different. And it was the end of my sex life in high school. I wasn’t really interested in anybody else; I didn’t have the time. And I couldn’t afford to invest so much of myself. I figured I would have plenty of opportunities in college.
And after sleeping with Troy, I never thought about sex with Duncan again. Not until that night in June.
He’d been coming to the café for several days, dropping by after work to pick up something to drink or sit there with a book and cake.
“So is this just innocent stalking or should I break out my pepper spray sometime soon?” I joked as I came to clear the plate and mug on his table.
He looked up from his book and smiled at me. “You’re not the one who should be worrying, it’s the cake.”
I laughed. “In that case, your waist line should also be concerned.”
“I have an excellent metabolism,” he countered.
“Well it’s official then. I hate you,” I joked.
He chuckled and we both looked at each other for a moment. “You have a break any time soon?” He asked.
“I’m actually getting off work in about fifteen.”
“Well you should come join me when you’re done.”
I nodded. “Will do.” I turned around and walked back to the counter with a grin on my face.
It took us half an hour for us to finish our conversation about everything from college to late night T.V., and another four minutes for us to walk out to his car, where he took thirty seconds before leaning in to kiss me while I was pressed up against the passenger door. It took ten seconds for me to remember exactly how he liked to be kissed and another minute before we moved our makeout session into the inside of the car.
The intensity grew, and I could feel his hard-on rub against my thigh. I bucked against him and let a moan escape my lips. My hands were on his waist, he reached for my belt, and I trembled. If I hadn’t been so wrapped up in him, I would have remembered I was wearing my unattractive uniform, I reeked of coffee, and my hair desperately needed to be washed. But the desire I’d once had for him was rushing back to me and I could have sworn the heat between us was a fire.
“Not. Here,” I panted between kisses.
He nodded, and stopped momentarily to ask, “My place?”
I thought about this. Answering this question was basically agreeing to do what we were about to do. This wasn’t sudden, this was long overdue. I shook my head. “No, mine. Empty.”
He nodded again and climbed into the driver’s seat.
My bed wasn’t as big as his, but we didn’t really notice. It started out soft and gentle, then went back to rushed and eager. I could hear myself panting, and felt his hot breath on my skin.
When we finished, I lay entangled in his arms and he combed his fingers through my hair gently, our naked bodies lying on top of the sheets, feeling the cold breeze from the air conditioner.
Our second time around was less hasty and more calculated. I’d close my eyes and when I’d open them again, I’d see him over me and realise that even after all these years, to me, he was perfect.
In the end I had to tell him to go, out of fear my father would come home from work and find him in my bed. He promised to call me the next day.
He did. And he took me out that weekend. It was then that we discovered that we wouldn’t be able to even feign the sort of relationship we once had.
The conversation throughout the night was awkward and sometimes forced. He was quieter than I had remembered, and I was far more forward than I had once been. I talked about France and Boston, and he talked about his internship at the Mayor’s office. He told me about the cutting of certain research grants in California, and I described the reading I saw of an obscure poet in Nice. And that was when we talked at all.
He’d reach to hold my hand, but he didn’t know I preferred to hold with my right hand, so I held his hand feeling awkward until I finally just let go.
He dropped me off at the end of the night and kissed me on the cheek. He didn’t say he’d call me later, for which I was grateful.
---
“Isn’t this a little backwards?” Lilly wondered loudly.
I pushed off the side of the pool and glided to the middle, paddling toward Lilly.
She treaded water with her big pink pool noodle and motioned towards the guys tanning with their eyes closed on the deck. “Aren’t WE supposed to be sun bathing at the side while they goof around in the pool?”
I contemplated this for a moment. “They’re pansies,” I grinned.
Duncan just ignored us, while Logan peaked open his right eye for a moment, and gave me the contemptuous look. Lilly and I both howled with laughter.
She paddled slowly around in the pool, making light splashes as her hands hit the water.
I closed my eyes and submerged myself under the water. I opened my eyes and could see Lilly’s body, and her dark blue bathing suit. At least, that’s what I assumed. She wasn’t clearly defined. While underwater, the lines were blurred, the colours faded and fuzzy, and distance was difficult to gage. But I knew she was there.
All of a sudden, there was the muffled sound of two giant crashes one right after another, and two more fuzzy forms were visible under the water. I quickly emerged from under the water and gasped for breath as I resurfaced. Duncan was splashing around as Lilly scowled at him for causing such a ruckus. Suddenly I felt arms embrace me from behind, holding onto me tightly.
I shrieked, and Logan chuckled into my ear.
“Let go of me!” I yelped.
He pushed me under the water again, but let go of me quickly and I flailed as I bounced back up to the top again.
“That was for calling us pansies!” he grinned.
Lilly and Duncan both laughed, and I leapt in Logan’s direction, pushing him and submerging us both below the surface this time.
My eyes were open, and while everything else was fuzzy, the image of his face below me as we struggled underwater was perfectly clear.
---
“So what’s the deal with you and my brother?”
“Gee, why does that sound familiar?”
“Because you can’t seem to stay away from Donut?” She fanned her hands in the air, trying to dry the nail polish on them.
I leaned back into my pillow, closing the bottle of Satin Red I’d just used on her nails. “How did you know, anyway?
“I didn’t,” she grinned. “I just guessed.”
I rolled my eyes. “Right.”
“Is this like... True love rekindling?”
“Did he tell you?” It seemed unlikely Duncan would discuss his sex life with his sister.
“... Or is it just for fun?” She looked at me suspiciously, as if the possibility of me sleeping with her brother were a mystery that needed to be solved.
I sighed. “Can we not talk about this?”
She shrugged and sprawled out on the foot of my bed. “So what the hell are you going to do with a degree in Journalism and French?”
“Well I was thinking about finding world peace and ending hunger.”
“Yeah? And AFTER you’re Miss America, what then?”
“I don’t know. Work as a journalist. Or a photojournalist. And maybe go back to France.” I thought about this for a moment. “What made you go into pre-med?”
“I didn’t. I thought I was signing up for fashion design.”
---
Even almost a month after I slept with Duncan, I couldn’t seem to get away from the concept of him and I together.
“So are you dating Duncan again?”
“How long have you been waiting to ask that, Mom?”
“It’s just that I called the apartment and your father said you were out with Duncan.”
“Just because we spend time together doesn’t mean-- god, are you still in high school?”
“There’s no need to take that tone, Veronica.” I was sure she found me as exhausting as I found her.
“How are you, Mom?” My voice became softer, but concerned.
“I’m your mother. I should be asking you that. And with everything that’s happ-”
“Mom!” Backup jumped from his spot at the foot of my bed, alarmed by my sudden and whiney tone.
I could hear her sigh through the phone, resigned. “I’m fine, sweetie. How’s your summer going?”
“It’s fine.”
“You miss Boston?”
“I miss France even more.”
The line went silent, and I heard some people talking in the background. It almost hurt, how strained our conversations had become. Mothers and daughters aren’t supposed to be like this, I told myself.
But it was ok. I was dealing. Even without her and my dad, I was ok, because I wasn’t alone for the meantime. I had something I could immerse myself in, even though I knew it would be short-lived. It was another time warp; I could pretend the past and the future didn’t exist as long as I was wrapped up in the summer.
“Veronica?” My mother’s voice startled me out of my trance.
“Yeah?”
“I should probably let you go.”
“Yeah, I need to take Backup out.”
“Bye honey.”
“Bye Mom.”
I turned my phone off and hugged my pillow. She would be done with rehab in about two weeks, which meant I’d be able to go stay with her in Texas, away from Neptune, if I wanted. I was a twenty-year-old who just wanted her mommy. At the same time, I was quite enjoying my time warp. To leave would be returning to real life again.
---
“Does anybody care that this band is so five minutes ago?” Lilly moaned as we stood in line.
“Only you, Lilly. Only you.” Duncan replied dryly.
“Panic! At the Disco is a really stupid name.”
I turned to Lilly and retorted, “You have the same name as a flower. I don’t think you’re really in a position to criticise.”
The guys both chuckled lightly and Lilly shut up. I didn’t really care about seeing the show either way. I don’t think the guys did either. But it was an excuse to come out to L.A. instead of being in Neptune on a Friday night.
We made our way in, and it was already swimming with people. By the time the opening act started, the place was packed.
“I think I just saw a twelve year old!” Lilly announced loudly.
“Well that’s disturbing, seeing as they would have been like, nine when these guys came out,” Logan replied.
We all got drinks; we picked a spot far enough away that we wouldn’t be mobbed by crazy fans and close enough to see well. Of course, being only about five foot one, it was hard to see at all.
Logan leaned over and murmured, “You need me to give you a lift?”
I stuck my tongue out at him.
“I think we’ve lost Lilly.” Duncan motioned to his sister, who had drifted away and was talking to two guys who were definitely not twelve.
The headliners started to play and the crowd went crazy.
“You know, I can’t remember the last time I went to a concert,” Logan noted.
“Me either,” I agreed. “And I don’t even know any of the songs they’ve played so far.”
We looked at the crowd, then at each other, then laughed. We were by far more subdued than most of the people around us.
Duncan started to drift away from us as well, and I started to get bored.
“Come on, I’m sure we can still hear the bad music from outside, too,” Logan said tugging at my arm. I followed without hesitation.
We stumbled into the side alley, gasping for hot and muggy air.
“Fuck, since when do twelve-year-olds wear so much bad perfume?” Logan moaned.
“Fuck, why the hell is it so hot even at night?”
“It’s California, Ronnie, what did you expect? You grew up here, remember?”
“You’re not supposed to call me Ronnie, remember?”
“But it fits you so well,” he replied, looking me over. “By the way, why did you start dressing like, you know...” He motioned at my clothes, then pulled out a pack of cigarettes from his back pocket.
“What, you don’t like it?” I said in an exaggerated girly voice, as if I really cared, and then reached over to take a cigarette out of the pack before he closed it up again.
He raised his eyebrows. “You smoke, too?”
I shrugged. “Not really. Social smoker, you could say. Habit I picked up in France.”
“Impressive.”
“Yeah, I thought so.”
He held the lighter for me so I could light my cigarette, and then lit his own.
“So you work a lot, don’t you?”
I nodded, “Think I would get bored otherwise.” Pause. “What about you? How do you spend your time when you’re not relishing spending time with us?”
He hesitated, “I’ve been working at a publishing house part time, actually.”
“Really!?” I tried not to sound too surprised, but I probably wasn’t very successful.
He didn’t seem to mind. “Yeah, it doesn’t pay much, and it can be boring at times, but it’s better than nothing.”
“And what prompted this career move?”
“Well I study Mass Comm., so I guess it’s kind of related...”
“Do you enjoy it?” He nodded. “Well that’s great then, Logan,” I grinned. “It’s more than I can say about working at the café.”
I heard the band start playing a new song and gasped, “This is the only song of theirs I know and like!”
“You want to go back in?”
“Nope,” I said immediately. I finished my cigarette and started humming along to the song.
He finished his, and continued on to his second. “It’s strange. Even when you seem happy, singing or whatever, you still have that look on your face.”
I looked at him, confused, “What look?”
“You know, that look. Like you’re ready to run at any moment.”
My suitemate in sophomore year, Kelly, had told me something similar once. “Yeah...” Was the only answer I could come up with.
He looked at me as if waiting for further explanation, but I gave him none. “Is that why you went to France?”
“I went to France to get laid,” I joked half-heartedly.
“If you say so.”