And the feeling that it's all a lot of oysters, but no pearls.
I pulled out of my driveway tonight and managed to run two stop signs in the process. Got side-swipped with the idea of a police man pulling me over and asking for my license and registration. This is where it begins:
And then our eyes meet.
And my heart thumps in my chest.
And I get tingly all over as I hand him my information in the form of a plastic card.
Skip to thoughts of past lovers and I can only wonder: Just how many people have fallen in love with an officer of the law who pulled them over for doing something illegal? Good god, don't they have talk shows for this sort of thing?
Rewind to a commercial I saw once on TV that made me so happy I thought I could cry.
They're standing across the street from one another, he in his hotdog suit, and she in her Pepsi outfit. Somehow they see eachother from across the way and suddenly unite, just knowing they're meant for one another. Hotdogs and sodas are foods from the gods. Holding hands they walk down the street and into the sunset, and all I can think after seeing this is how much I'd love to meet the love of my life in a hotdog costume.
Lets recap: It seems as though this chapter in my life is coming to a close rather quickly with nothing more than a period to end the bullshit. A period, and nothing more. Nothing exciting, nothing to question, just the simplest of all punctuation to end another dull section in my life. A stupid fucking dot for a stupid fucking story.
The new page looks fresh and exciting, and I think I'm ready to write something unlike anything I've ever written before. I want to write about change and freedom and a new boy who allows my heart to jump in my throat whenever I'm around him. An unspeakable force continues to hold me back, and maybe it's really a hidden fear for what could possibly lie ahead?
This one time this boy and I sat on the side of my street in his truck, looking out the window. Unsure of what to say, but knowing full well what we wanted to do. He turned to me and said, "I'd like to kiss you now if that's alright." And that is exactly what he did. And I felt it all over because he touched my face with a soft hand and his lips were more than convincing. Afterwards we giggled like two kids who had just done something we weren't suppose to. He waited until I crossed the yard and unlocked the front door that night. Waited until I got in safely before he drove away. Waited til he got home to call me and tell me what a lovely time he had that evening.
That was my first dose of true happiness.
This other time, another boy proposed we go play outside in the pouring rain. And we danced in puddles and held out our hands to introduce the droplets of cold water to our innocent bodies. Cats and dogs fell around us, and that night we kissed in a manner that left me in a daze.
I remember it like it was yesterday.
Thus since our bodies have intertwined, collided, and struggled in the dark for something more than what was really there. Perhaps this could have been the beginning of something beautiful? Oh, I suppose we'll never know.
I have my favorite pages marked with post its, and you have yours locked in closets and buried under excess baggage. Covered up with memories and pictures and the idea of the perfect girl. I will never be that girl. And feelings for me will continue to clash; you're the oil, I'm the vinegar. We'll never, ever touch, no matter how hard I shake that fucking bottle. I've grown to accept this now, settling comfortably to the bottom where I will one day watch you fall apart.
If there's one thing I've learned in the last month it is this: You have to be an asshole to ever truly obtain what you want. Nice guys always finish last, don't you dare forget it.
The last sentence will read: I came, I saw, I was defeated.
And then our eyes meet.
And my heart thumps in my chest.
And I get tingly all over as I hand him my information in the form of a plastic card.
Skip to thoughts of past lovers and I can only wonder: Just how many people have fallen in love with an officer of the law who pulled them over for doing something illegal? Good god, don't they have talk shows for this sort of thing?
Rewind to a commercial I saw once on TV that made me so happy I thought I could cry.
They're standing across the street from one another, he in his hotdog suit, and she in her Pepsi outfit. Somehow they see eachother from across the way and suddenly unite, just knowing they're meant for one another. Hotdogs and sodas are foods from the gods. Holding hands they walk down the street and into the sunset, and all I can think after seeing this is how much I'd love to meet the love of my life in a hotdog costume.
Lets recap: It seems as though this chapter in my life is coming to a close rather quickly with nothing more than a period to end the bullshit. A period, and nothing more. Nothing exciting, nothing to question, just the simplest of all punctuation to end another dull section in my life. A stupid fucking dot for a stupid fucking story.
The new page looks fresh and exciting, and I think I'm ready to write something unlike anything I've ever written before. I want to write about change and freedom and a new boy who allows my heart to jump in my throat whenever I'm around him. An unspeakable force continues to hold me back, and maybe it's really a hidden fear for what could possibly lie ahead?
This one time this boy and I sat on the side of my street in his truck, looking out the window. Unsure of what to say, but knowing full well what we wanted to do. He turned to me and said, "I'd like to kiss you now if that's alright." And that is exactly what he did. And I felt it all over because he touched my face with a soft hand and his lips were more than convincing. Afterwards we giggled like two kids who had just done something we weren't suppose to. He waited until I crossed the yard and unlocked the front door that night. Waited until I got in safely before he drove away. Waited til he got home to call me and tell me what a lovely time he had that evening.
That was my first dose of true happiness.
This other time, another boy proposed we go play outside in the pouring rain. And we danced in puddles and held out our hands to introduce the droplets of cold water to our innocent bodies. Cats and dogs fell around us, and that night we kissed in a manner that left me in a daze.
I remember it like it was yesterday.
Thus since our bodies have intertwined, collided, and struggled in the dark for something more than what was really there. Perhaps this could have been the beginning of something beautiful? Oh, I suppose we'll never know.
I have my favorite pages marked with post its, and you have yours locked in closets and buried under excess baggage. Covered up with memories and pictures and the idea of the perfect girl. I will never be that girl. And feelings for me will continue to clash; you're the oil, I'm the vinegar. We'll never, ever touch, no matter how hard I shake that fucking bottle. I've grown to accept this now, settling comfortably to the bottom where I will one day watch you fall apart.
If there's one thing I've learned in the last month it is this: You have to be an asshole to ever truly obtain what you want. Nice guys always finish last, don't you dare forget it.
The last sentence will read: I came, I saw, I was defeated.