Fic: Before There’s a Chance to Begin (5/5)
.previous
“Whoa!”
Chris was startled awake by the door being opened with a bang, the sounds of raucous laughter interrupting his peaceful slumber. A group of students were standing in the doorway with looks of surprise on their faces. However just as fast as the door had opened it was closed again. Chris could make out the sounds of giggles and, “Dude, is your roommate gay?” from a few of the people. Chris glanced over his shoulder to see Zach, still asleep, spooned up against Chris’s back.
Seeing Zach there all curled up and contented made his chest ache a little. He’d hurt Zach for a couple of months and he never wanted to do that to him again. “You awake?” he murmured.
Zach gave a slight hum. “After that dick came in, yeah.” His brown eyes were sleepy and his hair was flopping all over the pillow. Chris laid his head back down, trying not to lean in too close but finding it difficult in the twin bed.
“I think that was the first time I’ve actually seen your roommate...,” Chris mused.
Zach itched his head, pushing more hair onto his face. “Yeah, he’s kind of known for making the walk of shame. He has a girlfriend on another floor and... well...”
“Right.” Chris nodded in understanding and gave a loud yawn.
“Thanks,” Zach whispered, “for not leaving.”
Chris opened his eyes and looked at Zach. Zach had the tiniest smile and Chris couldn’t believe the thought of leaving hadn’t even crossed his mind. He was so grateful and happy and Chris wanted to kiss him so badly. There was no way he could leave Zach and he wished he hadn’t run away all those times before. Chris’s eyes locked on Zach’s pink cheeks and his gorgeous lips. Zach’s teeth tugged at his bottom lip and Chris had to look away. He didn’t want to scare Zach and ruin everything all over again. “I’m a little impressed myself,” Chris admitted. “I think your morning breath paralyzed me.”
“You’re one to talk,” Zach joked and scrunched his nose up, receiving a punch from Chris. Zach just smiled and closed his eyes like he was about to drift back to sleep at any instant.
Chris hesitated for a moment before murmuring, “I have to thank you too for last night...”
Zach placed a hand on Chris’s shoulder and Chris swallowed. “Let’s not think about that, okay? Unless you want to talk about it-”
“No,” Chris interrupted. “I mean, yeah, not right now at least. Just... thanks.”
Zach nodded and Chris pressed closer to Zach, arms wrapping around his body. Chris didn’t feel frightened like he had the night before or jittery. He felt comfortable and safe and he cuddled in closer before falling to sleep, nuzzled against Zach’s chest.
***
The semester went by too fast.
Exams seemed to come up before Chris had even considered studying for them and soon he found himself holed up in his room surrounded by stacks of open books with Zach sitting close by, his own pile of readings circling him. When they weren’t studying, they were arranging plans for returning home for the holidays. Zach and Chris spent hours trying to figure out bus routes for Zach to take back to Pittsburgh that didn’t leave at 2AM. But the thing that Zach spent most his time on was practising for his play. The big performance was coming up just after exams finished and it was obviously taking a toll on Zach, who was normally the most zen person Chris knew and was now having headaches from all the stress. Chris kept offering to help in any way he could but Zach kept shaking his head and telling Chris to keep studying.
“You don’t have to attend the rehearsals, Chris,” Zach comforted him. “Just come to the actual performance, okay?”
Chris could do that.
The play was a day after Chris’s last exam and it was also his last night on campus before he went home for the winter break. He took his seat in the almost-empty theatre save for the few seats that were taken by parents, professors and a few students who appeared to actually be into drama. At least that’s what Chris assumed as they took the front row and each talked about the “best interpretation of The Scottish play” that they had ever seen. When the curtain was pulled back, everyone in the theatre quieted down and a few parents took out their camcorders.
Zach didn’t get one of the lead roles he had been hoping for but instead had gotten a fairly big part, at least for a first year, as Antonio. It was obvious he had a passion for what he was doing while a few of the other actors looked about ready to call it quits and head home for winter break right in the middle of a scene. Zach did lose focus for one minute as he stood, behind the kid playing Sebastian, and his eyes wandered to where Chris was. Chris couldn’t help but grin even though he wasn’t sure Zach could even see him but when Zach’s lip quirked for a moment, Chris was pretty sure he had.
When the play ended Chris clapped enthusiastically with everyone else and left when the curtain fell, waiting for Zach outside. He stuck his hands in his pocket, it was chilly that December evening and it even looked as if it may actually snow. Thankfully Zach came out of the theatre just as Chris’s teeth began to chatter.
“Hey,” Zach said humbly, not allowing his obvious happiness to light up his face.
Chris punched him in the arm though which made Zach grin. “Dude, you were awesome!”
“Thanks,” Zach said and Chris really wanted to hug him and tell him he did a spectacular job and allow Zach to tell him all about the experience while they curled up together.
Instead he shivered in the cold and said, “C’mon. I’ll buy you a cup of coffee.”
Zach laughed, “You get it for free.”
“Hush!” Chris joined in the laughter and resisted the urge to snuggle against Zach’s side in the cold. The campus coffee shop was pretty dead when they arrived there. Almost all the students had gone home for winter break except for one extremely disgruntled cashier who did not look amused at having to make a new pot of coffee half an hour before closing.
Zach chose a two person table and sipped at his coffee while he gave an in depth description of the play and all the drama behind the scenes while Chris listened and tried not to get excited about their legs touching under the table.
***
Chris returned back to the dorm room, face red from the cold, hands buried in his pockets and a stupid grin still plastered on his face when he thought about the way Zach’s shoulders had kept bumping into his when they had taken a walk after their coffee.
“Oh, man,” Chris stopped in the doorway when he sees John’s side of the room looking particularly clean and a suitcase in the centre of the room. “Are you going home tonight?”
“Yup,” John nodded from where he sat on his bed, texting on his phone. “I’m taking the bus tonight in order to miss the big rush tomorrow. How was Zach’s play?”
“He did great,” Chris couldn’t help a slight note of pride sliding into his voice.
John made a slight hum. “So how has everything gone with... things?”
Chris’s face turned red and he stammered, “Things... What things?”
“With Zach. I paid serious money for your new toy so I better get some dirt, Chris.”
Chris moved uncomfortably. “I made a move and he punched me in the face.”
“What?” John looked up from his phone with concern. “Tonight?”
“No! About a month or two ago...” Chris shrugged. “I haven’t tried anything since then.”
“Do you still ‘love’ him?”
Chris gave a face at the word. “I really like him, yeah.”
“And does he ‘really like’ you?”
Chris shrugged and looked at his feet, licking at his mouth. “I don’t know. He said he did once but I think I ruined it...” Chris sank down in his chair. “I don’t know...”
John paused a moment before saying. “Huh. Well I have to go catch my bus. See you in two weeks?”
“Yeah,” Chris gave a smile as John picked up his stuff. “See ya, man.”
“Yup, bye buddy. Hope Santa’s good to you this year.” Chris laughed as John pulled his suitcase through the door and, just as Chris turned to his laptop, he heard the door creak open a little more. “When’s Zach going home for break?”
“Uh, tomorrow afternoon,” Chris replied, confused. “Why?”
“Have a Happy New Year as well, eh!”
“Yeah, you too-” Before Chris could say anymore, John was out the door.
***
The insistent knocking was what woke Chris up that night.
He stayed in bed hoping that whoever was banging on his door would get tired of it and eventually move on to bother someone else. Almost all the students in the building had left home for the holidays so Chris wasn't overly surprised a drunk had decided tonight would be a good night to just go crazy in the residence. But why did it have to be Chris’s room? It was unfair. His eyes trailed to the bed side table where the clock looked too bright in the darkened room. It was fucking 2AM.
With a frustrated groan Chris swung his feet off the side of the mattress and took a second to calm his dizzy head. The rapping at the door was still as loud as ever and Chris stood on shaky legs to quiet it.
"Please, for the love of God, shut up!" Chris yawned out as he opened the door only to stop with a dumb expression on his face when he saw who was standing there. "Zach?"
Zach looked as if he had just finished running a marathon. There was a bit of sweat on his brow and his chest was heaving as if he were about to cough up a lung. His eyes widened with surprise as he stammered, "Y-you're okay...?"
"What?" Chris frowned. "What are you doing here?"
"I got a call," Zach said, pressing a hand to his temple and hunching over slightly from exhaustion. He panted in between every word as he spoke. "John said he had gotten a text from you saying there was an emergency.... but he's already home so I had to come see you. I ran..." Zach's voice trailed off and he looked embarrassed, an expression Chris had never seen on his face before.
“Why wouldn't I just phone 911 if I was in ‘big trouble’?" Chris laughed. “Or just phone you and not John?”
"I guess when I get an emergency phone call at 2 in the morning I just assume it’s true."
Zach's voice had an edge to it and Chris stopped laughing. Zach looked as if he might fall over but his eyes were full of relief. Running from Zach's residence to Chris's was not exactly a quick sprint and Chris slumped. "I'm sorry, man. I can’t believe John would be such an ass-hat."
Zach shook his head and turned his eyes to the ground. He gave a ragged exhale and moved his hand over his face. “N-nah...” He slouched and his hands reached out weakly to find Chris. He held on to the front of Chris’s t-shirt and his knuckles were white under his skin. “Give me a second... ‘kay?”
Chris nodded and was surprised when he felt Zach's arms wrap around him. Not in a tight bear hug but more just needing to rest.
Needing to know that Chris was actually there
"Fuck, I thought... Something had happened.... I wouldn't see you again..." His voice was just barely audible but it made Chris shake and he moved to hold Zach tight.
Zach hugged back until his knees buckled and Chris couldn't take the weight, both of them falling to the floor in the doorway. Chris didn't care that they were under the fluorescent lights in the hallway and anyone could choose right then to walk in or that the security camera was pointing right at them. He wasn’t letting go of Zach. He didn't want to ever give this up; this feeling of being held and being held back and being needed.
He could feel Zach pressing his nose against his neck and there were heavy breaths. Chris felt everything melt from him. All the sadness, all the anger and just everything that had been building up over the past few months suddenly floated away. He would almost believe he was floating if it wasn't for Zach's weight keeping him firmly in place. Chris moved to press his nose, just a little, against Zach's chin, the stubble itching at his tender skin. They moved until their noses were pressing against each others, a sleepy movement, before Chris gently pressed his lips against Zach’s. He wasn’t slapped away this time and Zach instead kissed back, placing a soft kiss on Chris’s mouth before going in for more.
Chris felt a warmth quickly growing in his gut as his arms moved from around Zach’s side to start messing in his hair. Zach groaned into the kiss and nipped at Chris’s lip, shifting so that he could move in closer. Zach jumped back in surprise when he pressed his body against Chris’s and felt the bulge in Chris’s pyjama pants.
“You’re hard?” Zach blinked and Chris felt his face grow hot with embarrassment.
“I can’t believe you’re still surprised,” Chris scoffed. “I like you, Zach.”
Zach continued to look bewildered for a second before going in for a deep, toe-curling kiss and toppling Chris over in the process. They tangled their legs together and their hands pulled at each other’s clothing. Chris didn’t feel the fear of being dominated like he had with the guy at the party. He actually liked Zach’s strong body on top of him, the heavy weight of him enveloping Chris’s body in a wave of heat. Chris kept kissing him even though his body wanted more, hormones screaming to speed this up. He tried to ignore it though, even though he could feel Zach’s own needy hands and his hard dick.
Chris pulled back to give an experimental nip to Zach’s ears. Zach moaned and bit at his neck, hands sneaking down Chris’s back down to grip at his ass. Chris grunted at the sudden squeeze and he arched his back up off the ground. “D-do you..,” Chris stammered over his words before clearing his throat and nodding his head towards the bed.
Zach moved his hands back to Chris’s hips. “Are you sure about this?” he asked, not looking as if he wanted to back off in the least.
“Yeah...,” Chris said, eyeing Zach’s scruff. He moved his soft lips close to brush against the bristles and moved his mouth against Zach’s cheek, “Everything’s just... new.”
Zach moved to kiss him before they both stood up and moved to the bed. The covers were still thrown around from Chris rushing to the door earlier and the pillows were littering the floor. There was no hesitancy as Chris reached for Zach’s shirt, pulling it up over his head and then doing the same with his own. Chris could have looked at Zach forever if his dick wasn’t so hard right then. He kissed furiously as Zach played with the button on Chris’s pants, trying to work them off.
Chris reached his hand up to Zach’s chest and, when his hands didn’t feel the soft, squish of breasts but thick dark chest hair instead, he pulled back. His fingers played in it curiously and Zach stayed as still as he could as if he might spook Chris. When Chris tweaked a nipple and moved to touch his tongue to Zach’s Adams’ apple Zach figured it was okay to move.
Pants were flung away without Chris tripping awkwardly, which he was quite thankful about, and Zach gripped at Chris’s ass, pulling him closer so that he could easily feel Chris’s cock through his briefs. Chris’s breathing was a heavy pant by then and he released a strangled noise that he had been trying to hold back. “You’re a good boy, Chris,” Zach whispered in his ear.
Chris was about to say something about not wanting to be treated like a dog but Zach pushed his hips forward and all that came out was an incredibly loud moan. Zach pressed his nose into Chris’s hair, pressing kisses all over his head. Chris couldn’t help but think he was being marked., like Zach was putting a “NO GIRLS ALLOWED” sign up or a collar around Chris’s neck. And Chris didn’t care. He wanted to be with Zach and he gave a hard bite on Zach’s jaw as his own marking.
Zach brushed a hand against Chris’s bulge and Chris practically yelped at the contact. “Fuck,” Chris groaned and they began rutting against each other until Chris was panting into Zach’s mouth, licking at his lips. Zach pulled his briefs off and his dick sprung up, almost hitting his belly. Chris took off his own briefs and began touching himself. He was close.
It was like his hand was glued to his dick; he kept stroking it and Zach replaced it with his own in a fluid motion. Chris bit the inside of his cheek and couldn’t tear his eyes away from Zach’s hand. It was... strong. And firm. When Zach pressed a finger to the underside of Chris’s dick and a thumb to the slit he moaned loudly. “Fuck, Zach....” And his breathing came out fast as he came, his body shivering and his hips moving quickly in Zach’s hand.
He took his time to breathe and Zach jerked him all the way through his orgasm.
Chris fell forward and kissed Zach’s arms the best he could while he breathed hot and wet. He nuzzled against the thick hairs and tried to express how awesome the hand job was and how they should have done that sooner and everything he would be saying if his mouth was working properly.
It was then that he noticed Zach was still hard and he moved down towards it, pressing a saliva-wet kiss on the tip of his leaking cock.
“Chris!” Zach practically shouted. Chris laughed, hot breaths puffing onto Zach’s cock before he touched his tongue to the slit. Zach’s hips began bucking furiously and Chris had to wrap a hand around Zach’s dick to keep him still. Zach didn’t seem to mind though and sighed as Chris began to pump him, only putting his lips over the head in fear of Zach beginning another bout of thrusting as he got closer to climax.
Chris actually enjoyed giving Zach head. He thought for sure he would have been grossed out or whatever just by the thought of it. But when he saw Zach’s eyes, unfocused and watering, watching Chris bobbing his head up and down made him almost as aroused as if he were the one receiving the blow job. Well, not quite. But, fuck, it was a hot image.
Zach tipped his head back and his body tensed as he came. Cum landed on Chris’s face and in his hair. Once Zach’s body calmed down and he caught a look at Chris he quickly sat up, “Are you okay? Shit, I didn’t mean to-Geez, I’m sorry...”
Chris laughed as he grabbed a Kleenex and began to get the spunk out of his hair. Zach immediately began to help out, mumbling apologetically. It was the second time Chris had seen Zach so embarrassed and he couldn’t help but lean in for a kiss. Zach relaxed into his arms and they both lied down.
“Ugh I got spooge everywhere,” Chris yawned as he took more Kleenex to his tummy until Zach took it away from him and wrapped him into a tight hug. Chris ignored the wet spots that were still all over his comforter and closed his eyes; the early morning hour and the ‘excitement’ of the last twenty minutes finally hitting him hard.
“You okay?” Zach asked when Chris shook.
Chris nodded, barely able to do anything more. He sank against Zach’s chest and purred in pleasure. Zach was so warm and nice. Chris had passed coherency long ago and he could barely keep his eyes opened now. “I’m okay,” he murmured and Zach kissed his mouth. He pressed in closer, if he wasn’t so tired he would’ve gone for round two. The clock said it was almost 3AM and Chris could feel himself drifting to sleep. He wanted badly to touch Zach and speak dirty words into his ear instead of drooling onto his arm.
Both of them curled around each other, legs tangling and fingers twisting in hair.
“Geez, you know I imagined our first time being a little more than jerking each other off,” Chris laughed before yawning loudly.
“You were going to rock my world at 3AM?” Zach joked as he snuggled in close to Chris after throwing a stray Kleenex somewhere on the floor. Chris wanted to continue to joke but all he could manage to do was chuckle. Zach kissed his sweaty hair and Chris made quiet humming noises.
He didn’t even know why it mattered now but Chris couldn’t help but murmer, “I’m sorry...” and hold on to Zach tighter.
Zach pulled away and blinked before shaking his hand. “C’mon, Chris... I’m sorry too. I pushed you away even though....” He looked away and Chris pushed his mouth against his.
He didn’t want to talk anymore. They had talked enough over the past few months and each time words seemed to get lost in translation. But when they were like this-enjoying each other’s presence and just being honest and listening, everything seemed to fit.
The silence of the room finally seemed to match the mood Chris had been feeling all along. Since he had met Zach there had always been the comfort and the safety no matter where they were. And Chris was able to just revel in it and curl up closer to Zach without worrying about the consequences. He sighed against Zach’s mouth and knew everything was finally okay. All that stupid teen-angst, Dawson’s-Creek-drama-bullshit was gone and all that was left was the warmth and comfort that love had been holding back from him.
***
“Hey.”
Karl was more than a little surprised to see John standing in his doorway at ass o’clock in the morning. “Hey... What’s going on..?” he asked with a yawn. “I thought you were heading home tonight?”
“Nope, it was all a part of a devious plan! So, can I stay in your room? Mine’s preoccupied.” John gave a wink and Karl looked weary.
Closing the door a little, Karl shook his head. “This isn’t you getting advice for a friend again, is it?”
John laughed. “Nope. I think he’s finally sorted it all out.”
END
Back to part one // part two // part three // part four // art coming soon~!