finger prints on my bloody soul
I'm glad that I'm leaving soon...I'm going to be out of this state as quickly as possible I think I'm just going to take my ged and than go...it'll be much faster that way, I can leave the pain behind...and I don't think I will be back either...I wouild tell you where I'm going but it doesn't really matter if you know or not, no one can stop me from going. But it seems the more you talk the more I feel the need to leave. I feel unwelcome, unwanted and unloved here. And its sad that the only way I can tell anyone about my feelings is through this damn journal. Except steve, he still is the only one that I can truely talk to, thanks steve. I find myself again typing about random things now because I know if I get up from this computer I won't be getting up tomorrow, and please don't leave a comment like: oh everyone loves you, don't woory it'll pass, or you know I'm always there for you. I've heard them all so many times it makes me sick when I read them...if everyone who says they are there for me truely were than they wouldn't have to find out about it through my journal. Saturday is still on but I'm rethinking the guest list....and if you are still invited I'll tell you personally, and if I didn't tell you to come, well I'm afraid that means you aren't aloud there...I hope that people don't take that personally...its more than a couple people.