Jul 17, 2005 21:31
I haven't written in a while; been slacking off lately. But I was listening to some music that I had and it inspired me to write this journal entry. Thanks to Ao (I think; he was tryin' to show me a screenie) for the Vanessa Mae song and thanks to Matt for inspiring me to look for Adagio again.
The songs ... when I was listening to them, they made me think a little about my friends, especially the people from which the songs came from. Matt didn't give me Adagio, so I guess you could call the people inspirators, in a sense. But, as I said, they made me think about my friends more in depth than normal and it makes me appreciate them more for who they are and how much support they've given me. I know you've probably heard me say this a million times before, but somehow, I think this time seems to be more important that those other million times that I've said it.
Now, I'm going to talk about some people that I've thought about. I'm not going to name them for reasons I don't feel like stating (though, I'm sure you'll be able to assume why), but you'll probably be able to figure out who these people are...
Person #1:
Ahh... there are so many things to say about him. I like him. A lot. And a lot more than I feel I should, but how can one help how they feel? I know he may not like me. I know he may never like me, but somehow, I feel we have a special connection. I don't know yet if he's someone I'd go out with; I don't want to break the bond we have already made as friends. Everytime I'm around him at school, he was like my caretaker. That's sorta what I feel now, even though I still like him. In Hawaii, I noticed that a lot. Like, when we first went to the International Marketplace, we all started in a group, but it ended up being him and I together. I felt awkward; I had never been here before and he had many more times. Well ... more like three or four, I think, but it was a lot more than me. He wanted me to follow him every place and he made me feel really comfortable being shy and awkward. And the day before we went home, he kinda protected me when we got separated from everyone else. XD And when we DID meet up with people, he let me take that embarrassing picture of himself. Now, he's a lot more open to me than he used to be, or at least a lot more than in 8th grade when I just knew him as my boyfriend's best friend. If he ever reads my journal, by chance, and he'll know who this is, I want to thank him for being my friend. I know he's already heard this from me once before, but I would like to emphasize this now.
Person #2:
This person is very special too. Even though I've talked to him, I have never seen his face, yet somehow, I also feel the same passion and liking as the other person, only I don't neccesarily see him as the caretaker person like the person before. He is a caretaker, in a sense, seeing how I am all the time via email. I feel so warm whenever his prescence is mentioned. Isn't it always that way when you feel a certain way about someone? It seems rather odd to like such a person who I hardly see, but everytime he sends me an email, I feel his presence. Quoting someone, they once said that when you read a letter from someone, you're feeling what they wrote (or typed, in this case) and how they wrote it, as if you were really with them when they did. I feel really close to him, in this way. I still miss him, though. When I miss people, I feel a sense of happiness, and also, a dread feeling that they are not here with me and that I long to me. With this person, I feel more of this when they aren't here. More happiness, yet more dread, which is why I cherish every word I hear from him. If he ever reads my journal, by chance, and he'll know who this is, I mean this with all my heart. The same holds true for the message I sent you earlier as well.
Person #3:
(Coming soon!!!).