(no subject)
For the past 2 hours I have been glued to my tv screen playing Katamari Damacy, this playstation game where you roll this ball and collect items along the way. Somewhat a mindless game, but extremely fun.
Anyways, I've been trying to get my mind off of some things. A few hours before I returned home, I've been upset, angry, confused, questionable, and foolish. This is perhaps the first time where both sides of the party have tasted bitter defeat over an arguement. Have you ever had such a heated and opinionated encounter that it's to a point you don't know what the problem is the first place?
Let me tell you..... it's the worst kind. Not only you try to figure out what you said in the first place, but once you lose your trace of thought... you start talking crap left and right and start using each other's words against each other.
I'm not playing the victim nor am I trying to start a fight.... I'm just extremely opinionated and can be very blunt. Perhaps this is not my best feature... I don't know. Then again, there are several features I'm not to proud of within me. What did I learn today? Well, I learned that something like this really puts a damper between a relationship. I tried resolving it, but it couldn't be done. I think he was trying to resolve it, but it couldn't be done. I tried apologizing, but he didn't want to hear it. I didn't know what else to say, but he didn't want to hear that either.
I lost today because I was foolish. I haven't eaten, didn't get see him off before he went to Washington, wasted my time, traffic was hell, missed my wednesday fellowship, emotions on crack.... I feel awkwardly angry, yet I'm trying to remain calm as possible. I guess the important thing is that I haven't given up. Although as easy as those imfamous three letter words can be, the other dreaded three letter words can be easier said. No, it's a threat or a sign of sarcasim...it is a fact.
There is 2 days, perhaps more in which I can think things through, I hope he does too.
Anyways, I've been trying to get my mind off of some things. A few hours before I returned home, I've been upset, angry, confused, questionable, and foolish. This is perhaps the first time where both sides of the party have tasted bitter defeat over an arguement. Have you ever had such a heated and opinionated encounter that it's to a point you don't know what the problem is the first place?
Let me tell you..... it's the worst kind. Not only you try to figure out what you said in the first place, but once you lose your trace of thought... you start talking crap left and right and start using each other's words against each other.
I'm not playing the victim nor am I trying to start a fight.... I'm just extremely opinionated and can be very blunt. Perhaps this is not my best feature... I don't know. Then again, there are several features I'm not to proud of within me. What did I learn today? Well, I learned that something like this really puts a damper between a relationship. I tried resolving it, but it couldn't be done. I think he was trying to resolve it, but it couldn't be done. I tried apologizing, but he didn't want to hear it. I didn't know what else to say, but he didn't want to hear that either.
I lost today because I was foolish. I haven't eaten, didn't get see him off before he went to Washington, wasted my time, traffic was hell, missed my wednesday fellowship, emotions on crack.... I feel awkwardly angry, yet I'm trying to remain calm as possible. I guess the important thing is that I haven't given up. Although as easy as those imfamous three letter words can be, the other dreaded three letter words can be easier said. No, it's a threat or a sign of sarcasim...it is a fact.
There is 2 days, perhaps more in which I can think things through, I hope he does too.