I Can't SLEEP So I Am Venting
Lately, sleeping has been the hardest thing to do in my life.
On average I don't fall asleep until 2 in the morn.
I am not asleep for long either.
I get up in the middle of the night because of nightmares.
I shouldn't be having nightmares at my age.
But I have, 10 nights in a row.
It really sucks.
I really wish I had someone to keep me company at night.
Emily and Max aren't doing so good lately.
My mother was supposed to, but she fell asleep in her own bed.
I want my Joshy.
I want world to freeze for him and I to just catch up on our sleep.
We both need it really bad.
Ever since my bunnies have passed I haven't been my complete self.
I admit it, I have been iritable, sad, and just down.
I just miss them so much.
I can't think of them without crying.
Which means headache.
Summer school starts Monday.
I won't have to worry about rides to and fro.
Turns out a bus comes to pick me up and drop me off.
That luxury only lasts until July 20th but school is until August.
So....I need to get a fake liscence and drive.
I really could use my friends around.
I miss all of us together.
I know that has affected me too.
Ever since Carter's b-day things aren't at their best.
Without friends I am just not myself, I really am not.
Of course I still can't get over the fact that I gained fucking 40 pounds in a year.
I wan't to loose it but I don't have the money or time to do much.
I would like to exercise more, I have never been physically fit.
My iron is super low so I need tons of vitamins.
I have tried a certain diet/energy pill that just helped not gain wait for the 3 weeks I was on it.
So now I am trying to stay away from sweets and taking vitamins(when I remember them).
I am house sitting for Cherri starting at 9am.
I will only be there for a night.
I plan on going to Prarie Days.
Josh will be gone until 3 in the morning.
Sunday I will be going to see the movie CLICK.
I love Adam Sandler but David Hasselhoff is in it - weird.
Josh's b-day is coming up July 7th.
The big 2-0.
He is picking out his present because I want it to be perfect.
It is a brand new bed set for his comfy queen bed.
Right now his bedding doesn't match - typical guy.
It was hard picking what I was going to get for him.
Planning a birthday party for Ashley is hard to do.
It seems like I am the most willing to do anything.
I just wish I had the money to do it all.
Food money needs to appear in our hands quickly.
There will be atleast 12 people there, which is quite alot of hungry people to feed.
On average I don't fall asleep until 2 in the morn.
I am not asleep for long either.
I get up in the middle of the night because of nightmares.
I shouldn't be having nightmares at my age.
But I have, 10 nights in a row.
It really sucks.
I really wish I had someone to keep me company at night.
Emily and Max aren't doing so good lately.
My mother was supposed to, but she fell asleep in her own bed.
I want my Joshy.
I want world to freeze for him and I to just catch up on our sleep.
We both need it really bad.
Ever since my bunnies have passed I haven't been my complete self.
I admit it, I have been iritable, sad, and just down.
I just miss them so much.
I can't think of them without crying.
Which means headache.
Summer school starts Monday.
I won't have to worry about rides to and fro.
Turns out a bus comes to pick me up and drop me off.
That luxury only lasts until July 20th but school is until August.
So....I need to get a fake liscence and drive.
I really could use my friends around.
I miss all of us together.
I know that has affected me too.
Ever since Carter's b-day things aren't at their best.
Without friends I am just not myself, I really am not.
Of course I still can't get over the fact that I gained fucking 40 pounds in a year.
I wan't to loose it but I don't have the money or time to do much.
I would like to exercise more, I have never been physically fit.
My iron is super low so I need tons of vitamins.
I have tried a certain diet/energy pill that just helped not gain wait for the 3 weeks I was on it.
So now I am trying to stay away from sweets and taking vitamins(when I remember them).
I am house sitting for Cherri starting at 9am.
I will only be there for a night.
I plan on going to Prarie Days.
Josh will be gone until 3 in the morning.
Sunday I will be going to see the movie CLICK.
I love Adam Sandler but David Hasselhoff is in it - weird.
Josh's b-day is coming up July 7th.
The big 2-0.
He is picking out his present because I want it to be perfect.
It is a brand new bed set for his comfy queen bed.
Right now his bedding doesn't match - typical guy.
It was hard picking what I was going to get for him.
Planning a birthday party for Ashley is hard to do.
It seems like I am the most willing to do anything.
I just wish I had the money to do it all.
Food money needs to appear in our hands quickly.
There will be atleast 12 people there, which is quite alot of hungry people to feed.