i haven't been here in awhile....
i was diagnosed with lung disease about 17 months ago. i'm on the waiting list for a transplant.
i'm wondering if this is safe space where i can talk about the things i'm not allowed to talk about.
like, i'm dying and i feel like i am the only one even trying to accept that. not a giving up acceptance but an acceptance of having no real control. it helps me get through the bad days but then i can't say these things out loud and i'm plunged back into the misery of the unknown.
dying is stressful in so many ways and here i am not allowed to arrange things or let these feelings out.
i have to protect everyone and that leaves me to essentially die alone.
i'm wondering if this is safe space where i can talk about the things i'm not allowed to talk about.
like, i'm dying and i feel like i am the only one even trying to accept that. not a giving up acceptance but an acceptance of having no real control. it helps me get through the bad days but then i can't say these things out loud and i'm plunged back into the misery of the unknown.
dying is stressful in so many ways and here i am not allowed to arrange things or let these feelings out.
i have to protect everyone and that leaves me to essentially die alone.