Life
Life has its ups and downs. We get sad, happy, angry, fucked up. At times we can hate ourselves so much that we don't even want to be alive. Alot of people feel that way at times, and at times we can be so content with our life that we are so happy to just be alive. "Tell me something I don't know", right? Well...why don't we embrace all the good times that we had in life. I guess its easier to remeber all the bad rather than the good. ITS SOOO EASY and Cheap to dwell on all the horrible things that life WILL brought us AND WILL CONTINUE to bring us. Some handle it better than the next person will. Some don't know how to handle it so they can hurt the people closest to them without knowing it at all. I know for me I have really hurt my best friends at times that I was down. Its such a quick escape to push away the ones WE LOVE and the ones WHO CARE about us the most because they are the ones that want to help us and maybe we don't want to be helped. We get so down in that selfish state of mind...where we think NO ONE knows what we are going through, no one cares, they are all ignorent, they are fake, its all a show, they are saying what they want us to hear, they have the perfect life with the perfect family. Yes, I have felt this way. But guess what. WE ARE NOT comparing scar's and pain and who hurts more. EVERYONE HURTS. Maybe Not at this very moment. But everyone will get there share.
I wish I would take the time to appreciate what I do have more other than what
I don't or what I wish I had. Its okay to dream and wish and hope. BUT thats not going to get you anyware. Anyone who knows me KNOWS I am a big talker and a dreamer. But at least I fucking get off my ass and make things happen. Yeah, I know i am not the most talented girl in the world, not the prettiest OR smartest. But at least I am doing something. Nothing will ever be handed to you...maybe a few lucky people in this world. BUT FUCK if you are reading this right now you are lucky...you are alive, have a computer, live in california where everyone wants to be.
I am not saying to stop feeling sorry for yourself I FEEL SORRY FOR MYSELF ALL THE TIME at least I admit it and realize it and pull my head out of my ass. Good things happen to people all the time EVERYDAY weather you choose to see it OR NOT.
As much as my friends piss me off and annoy me sometimes THEY BRING ME SO MUCH FUCKING HAPPINESS. I never laugh as much around anyone. I will embrace that happiness for the rest of my life. Even if they dont stick around.
Move on...start over...pull your head out of your ass and be happy BECAUSE YOU CAN.
Yep...alot on my mind.
I wish I would take the time to appreciate what I do have more other than what
I don't or what I wish I had. Its okay to dream and wish and hope. BUT thats not going to get you anyware. Anyone who knows me KNOWS I am a big talker and a dreamer. But at least I fucking get off my ass and make things happen. Yeah, I know i am not the most talented girl in the world, not the prettiest OR smartest. But at least I am doing something. Nothing will ever be handed to you...maybe a few lucky people in this world. BUT FUCK if you are reading this right now you are lucky...you are alive, have a computer, live in california where everyone wants to be.
I am not saying to stop feeling sorry for yourself I FEEL SORRY FOR MYSELF ALL THE TIME at least I admit it and realize it and pull my head out of my ass. Good things happen to people all the time EVERYDAY weather you choose to see it OR NOT.
As much as my friends piss me off and annoy me sometimes THEY BRING ME SO MUCH FUCKING HAPPINESS. I never laugh as much around anyone. I will embrace that happiness for the rest of my life. Even if they dont stick around.
Move on...start over...pull your head out of your ass and be happy BECAUSE YOU CAN.
Yep...alot on my mind.