thoughts flow through my mind.

[sug4r]

As my school year wraps its self up, I have had alot of thoughts and memories flow through my mind.Most of the memories seem to come to me as hurtful and unenjoyable. I spent most of this year crying my heart out. I felt like a complete baby, this entire year. Sometimes you wish you didn't cry, but I find myself wondering why that is? Is it due to the fact that everyone stares, or the fact that everyone thinks your over exagerating, or is it because you don't want to be open or exposed? I do not really know. Mostly, I come to find it's more or so the fact that everyone is judging me. Why the hell do I care? I really do not know why. This year I have found that my heart is more caring and vurnerable than any part of myself. I realized I can never be who I was again, the summer before this year was the absolute best. Why did things have to change? That always lingers in my mind. With school, family, friends, love? I hate it. Life was more enjoyable as a sophmore in high school. I hated junior year. Despite the fact that I now work, I went to France, and I got my nipples pierced. I still hated this year. >.< I feel like I was a story in the making. I have so much to tell, and so little energy to tell. I sound like an irritating, complaining, brat, with nothing else to do at 12:46 in the morning than to complain and whine about how my year sucked. Rather, I am a girl who is misunderstood. If I had a label on my forehead that listed every hurtful, painful, detail of my
current state I could imagine peoples reaction coming to a shock. I love my family. My life that god has given me I just have great hatrid for the current situations I have been in.So as this school year wraps its self up, I still have thoughts and memories flowing through my mind.