I am a puppy slave.
Great, now that I've been doing this puppy thing for a few nights, I'm waking up automatically. Perfect. Oh yeah, Paul's chest was just violated by Brando. Apparently he smells like a puppy tit. And just to top off this early morning charade, there was a man-eating opossum snacking on our garbage when I took Otis and Ike out. Seriously, the thing was the size of my car. Otis thought it was there for him to play with, the opossum wasn't game. Everyone is okay though. Poor little Ike didn't even know what happened. Sometimes I think he's blind too, or maybe just retarded.