Potter Blood Feud excerpt by Broomstickflyer

Nov 07, 2011 07:14

hokay, how do I explain this. I went to the HMS STFU looking for more about PStibbons and ended up coming across this person. Now, I've since switched my stance on PStibbons, mainly because PStibbons is not actually a Harmonian. No... He's a Hermiophile. He's completely obsessed with Hermione to the point of not giving a shit about any other character if it doesn't deserve Hermione's notice. Therefore, his Hermione turns into The Bride from Kill Bill for his own amusement. He's very similar to Harmonians, though, in that he's completely batshit insane.

See, there's a big difference between your average H/Hr and a Harmonian. See, an H/Hr thinks Harry and Hermione were meant to be, or they just really like them together, and they don't like Ron because they don't think he deserves her, or, if they're more sane, think he's just not as suited to Hermione as Harry. You can Almost respect this lot if it weren't for the buckets of crazy they've had a long and stories history of in the past. They also complain and bitch a lot when their own smug, elitist attitude is tossed back at them by a group that has a right to be smug to them: namely anyone who saw the obvious. However, again, you can almost respect them because many of them are just enjoying their ship for whatever they can get from it.

Harmonians, however, broke away from the larger tent of the H/Hrs to build their own locked in compound complete with guard posts and barbed wire fencing on the perimeter to make certain no one strays from the cult of fantastic craziness they have. They broke away from the larger group because the larger group wasn't militant in their beliefs enough for this bunch. That is what we have. We have all that craziness from ages ago concentrated into this pool of complete absurdity that baffles me entirely and even pisses me off to the point that just one story from the point of view of these motherfuckers makes me unable to do anymore for several weeks. I'm not joking; I was quite done with PStibbons when I finally got all his bullshit together and he's not even a real Harmonian. Imagine the dumbest fucking person on the planet and then multiply them by a 100. That's how bad these people are. And that's how bad their bullshit will be no matter who you find to read. Unlike your average H/Hr the Harmonians fully believe that Harry and Hermione are the main protagonists of the greatest romance story ever created and that their love is so pure that it not only would have defeated Voldemort before Harry did in the seventh book, but also transcends sexuality entirely. They also fully believe that Ron and Ginny are not only evil, but their whole family are a bunch of evil people. Either that or they're all idiots. There are other things that one can associate with these bastards, but believe me you'll never want to deal with them. They all seem to have the reading comprehension level of a preschooler. Even kindergarteners have better reading comprehension than these assholes. Not only are they complete idiots and assholes, but they're elitist and bitch about how they're constantly persecuted by Harry/Ginny and Ron/Hermione shippers to the point that when the seventh book came out they immediately clammed up and the administrators of the FictionAlley forums told everyone to not boast about how they won. Given that we had been having to deal with these elitist, smug assholes for the better part of several fucking years without a single ounce of relief, I think you can imagine just why I think these cunts should be destroyed as quickly as possible.

So this is how we get to Broomstickflyer. Broomstickflyer is one of these Harmonians. Unlike PStibbons, they're not really Hermiophiles. They're tried and true Harmonians that fully believe the bullshit they shit out of their old, wrinkled asses. Broomstickflyer is a pair of grandparents that read their bullshit fanfictions to their grandchildren. I don't doubt that if they read this bullshit to their grandchildren that those grandchildren will grow up to be serial killers. Unfortunately for you all I couldn't find this fic for all I looked except the excerpt I found on the HMS STFU. The link on the HMS STFU was old, clearly, but these people have plenty of bullshit for you to vomit at.

Excerpt from "The Potter Blood Feud" by Broomstickflyer

seriously?, h/hr wtf?!, broomstickflyer, repeat offenders, evil!ron, that's fucking offensive!, look what i found!, canon rape, who the fuck writes this shit, who the fuck reads this shit seriously, evil!ginny

Previous post Next post
Up