(no subject)
it's a little late. i hear crickets, we're moving, kathy is going to hate me, i feel like shit sometimes, cursive is on, i'm still a little inebriated, i saw alot of people tonight, i ate too much, drank too much, am too much, alot is going to change for me in a few days, i'm ready, but i'm scared and i don't know if i can make kathy love me anymore, i'm hoping for the best but don't always know what to do to make things better, sometimes i'm not sure where i belong, sometimes i think about having the opportunity to give my life to someone who needs and deserves it, and how quickly i would do it for someone. maybe i'll persue the fire fighting services when i'm ready, maybe i'm not sure how to feel anymore, if i even feel or if have i been numbed in some senses and don't know what good things feel like. i know how good it feels to crack my knuckles, how bad it is for me and don't know how to stop. i want to stop
time
time